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JBXX155

Offline (the 08/17/2014 at 3:13pm) | Search for a member

JBXX155

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JBXX155's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend sent me an online money transfer. After forgetting the password and locking myself out of my account, I had to phone up the bank and have it reset. I was prompted to answer the security question, which was "What, what?" I had to say "In the butt." to get my money. FML

#16661334
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12661) - you deserved it (57939)

On 06/14/2011 at 1:57pm - money - by notinthebutt (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I found out that as a supervisor, if you reprimand a female worker and end the conversation with "Now get back to making sandwiches." your boss will consider it sexism and suspend you. I work at Subway. FML

#16589228
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50358) - you deserved it (7821)

On 06/10/2011 at 1:01am - work - by MakeMeASandwich (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my aunt gave my cat aspirin because when she touched his nose he had a 'fever'. I came home to a dead cat. FML

#16495613
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54941) - you deserved it (3737)

On 06/04/2011 at 7:22am - animals - by Clumsyblonde22 - United States

Today, I gave my husband an ultimatum: either he could have sex with me or play Minecraft. Needless to say, he spent the rest of the evening playing Minecraft. FML

#16467610
389 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35918) - you deserved it (13103)

On 06/02/2011 at 12:52pm - intimacy - by minecraftwilldie - United States (Illinois)

Today, I finally told the girl I've been after for more than a year that I'm attracted to her. Her response? A slight hug with a pat on the back as she said "There, there." FML

#16382753
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33090) - you deserved it (4173)

On 05/28/2011 at 2:54am - love - by fedemere - United States (Florida)

Today, I witnessed the miracle of life. More specifically, my cat giving birth on my bed at four in the morning. FML

#16359645
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35624) - you deserved it (7029)

On 05/26/2011 at 5:03pm - animals - by KittenTime (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I found out that whenever I send my son to his room, he goes on his iPod and buys the most expensive apps he can find. So far I've been charged $600. FML

#16332593
315 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21025) - you deserved it (48078)

On 05/24/2011 at 8:02pm - kids - by StupidApple -

Today, it was raining heavily. I saw a large puddle by the edge of the road near with a passing lady. Thinking it would be funny to splash her, I swerved to hit the puddle. The puddle was deeper than I thought. I lost control of the car, spun out, and hit two parked cars. FML

#16276951
503 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12240) - you deserved it (222251)

On 05/21/2011 at 2:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Utah)

Today, I woke up face-down in my grandfather's driveway, soaking wet with no pants, glitter in my hair, and holding an empty Skippy peanut butter jar. No one will tell me what happened. FML

#16258570
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32945) - you deserved it (20263)

On 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm - misc - by Devon (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I woke up so pissed off that I yelled at my cereal. FML

#16128268
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33654) - you deserved it (14864)

On 05/11/2011 at 10:33am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was told that I am an incredibly boring person and that it's no wonder I have no friends. I think they're right; last night I dreamt about a nail file. FML

#16064729
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28726) - you deserved it (6553)

On 05/06/2011 at 3:25am - misc - by goinginsane -

Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML

#15922476
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49279) - you deserved it (5789)

On 04/25/2011 at 5:39pm - misc - by Mike -

Today, at work, I spent half an hour trying to convince an elderly customer that no, I wasn't a messenger sent by the devil to take her soul to hell. FML

#15857597
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33576) - you deserved it (3217)

On 04/20/2011 at 10:15am - work - by rawr -

Today, I went for a job interview. I was asked if I wanted a drink. I have no idea why, but I replied "a bottle of milk please." FML

#15855605
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19156) - you deserved it (29576)

On 04/20/2011 at 4:10am - work - by bham boy -

Today, my cat took a shit in my toaster. FML

#15852262
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49893) - you deserved it (8081)

On 04/19/2011 at 10:21pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States



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