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Interwebzombie

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Interwebzombie

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 18 July 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 394
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Interwebzombie's page activity

Visits<b>annamaria55555</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 10:59am<b>Tezoma</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 4:16pm<b>WeiXinLun</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 4:49pm<b>ParrotSoup</b> - the 04/11/2013 at 5:29pm<b>Rob4614</b> - the 04/11/2013 at 1:46am

Interwebzombie's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of Interwebzombie's badges

Interwebzombie's favorite FMLs

Today, I was driving down the road when I got to a red light. I looked over and saw a hot chick in a convertible so I spoke to my window thinking she couldn't hear me "Hey girl, I may have a tiny dick but I make up for it in speed and stamina." She looked over. I forgot about the sunroof. FML

#239452
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8220) - you deserved it (78378)

On 03/08/2009 at 12:36am - intimacy - by Smash_Mouth - United States (Florida)

Today, I was in spanish class, having a debate about the death penalty. When I went to make a point, I meant to say "La pena de muerte", which means "The death penalty". I said, "La pene de muerte". Turns out that means, "The penis of death". FML

#206263
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26542) - you deserved it (41523)

On 03/04/2009 at 12:42pm - misc - by Señor Guapo (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my mother was re-enrolling me in school so she was required to fill out some paper work. Later, she asks me, "What does Caucasian mean?". I ask, "Why?". Apparently she didn't recognize the word so she checked "other" and wrote in "white". FML

#192383
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46061) - you deserved it (4886)

On 03/03/2009 at 12:37am - misc - by buryuntime (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's place with grumbling stomach pains. I left him in bed to go have explosive diarreah in the bathroom next to his room. When I was done, I came back to bed and snuggled in next to his sleeping form and he rolled over to whisper, "I heard everthing." FML

#185544
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72651) - you deserved it (15762)

On 03/02/2009 at 4:51pm - love - by ohmygoodness (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my dad woke me up at 6 told me to take a shower and drove me to school only to say "just kidding, happy snowday!" FML

#183630
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83489) - you deserved it (12245)

On 03/02/2009 at 2:01pm - misc - by EPICfml. (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I wore out the highest heels I had but was nervous about falling because I am such a klutz. I got through the night without any injuries, so I changed into the sneakers I had brought with me to walk home. I tripped right outside my house in my sneakers and broke my ankle. FML

#153309
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51046) - you deserved it (5332)

On 02/27/2009 at 3:23pm - misc - by klutz - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, an extremely large lady came into the dry cleaners where I work. She puts what I assume is a blanket on the counter to be dry cleaned. I said, "So just the one blanket then?" She replied, "Those are my pants, not a blanket." She was a size 56. FML

Today, I decided to practice putting a condom on with my mouth. Then my roommate walked in on me using my mouth to roll a condom onto a banana. FML

#138318
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14162) - you deserved it (68376)

On 02/25/2009 at 10:01pm - intimacy - by banana (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my guy friend and I were in his dorm room watching a movie when he started kissing me. Things heated up so we moved things over to his bed. He was on me when a hand shoots down from his top bunk. His roommate had been up there the whole time and he wanted a high-five. So they high-fived. FML

#125499
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82048) - you deserved it (20431)

On 02/24/2009 at 6:32pm - intimacy - by Menareidiots (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was pissing in a urinal and I had the urge to sneeze. Unable to hold it, I sneezed and hit my head on a metal beam supporting the urinal. In complete disarray, I had to step back from the urinal while pissing and managed to spray the floor, the wall, and the person next to me. FML

#125156
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56678) - you deserved it (6778)

On 02/24/2009 at 5:57pm - misc - by iliketurtles (man) - United States (California)

Today, I stayed home, sick in bed. I had been sleeping on my arms. I got up quickly to grab the phone. My numb left arm rocketed and punched me in the (now cut) lip, which threw me off balance, making me smash my (now bloody) nose off of the headboard. It was a telemarketer. FML

#123831
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48660) - you deserved it (5466)

On 02/24/2009 at 3:34pm - health - by Sick (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I asked my dad if he could fix my bed. It had been squeaking for some time. He shook his head no. He then continued with, "Your bed is a security system and as far as I can tell, you haven't gotten any in weeks". FML

#122895
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44209) - you deserved it (4573)

On 02/24/2009 at 1:13pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Florida)

Today, I jokingly told my mom that I was having sex with my Professor. Her response was, "As long as you're getting A's, honey!" FML

#93640
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28329) - you deserved it (48050)

On 02/21/2009 at 12:36am - intimacy - by acincollege (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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