About Incognito23 : Hi(: My name is Isabella.. I'm not sure exactly what to say here or what, if anything, you are hoping to find out, so I'm just going to say that if you are in the mood to talk, I'm all for it. I like talking to new people. So message me if you like(: If not, have a nice day.
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Incognito23's favorite FMLs
Today, my psychopathic ex-girlfriend spray-painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van, knowing damn well I have to park it in front of an elementary school on a daily basis to pick up my daughter. FML
by cjw / 03/05/2013 at 7:07pm / United States / Kids
Today, while riding the train home, I noticed a man who kept looking at me. Annoyed, I told him to be less obvious and to stop staring. He promptly responded, "Bitch, I'm gay, and even I can tell no one would want to look at you." FML
by assoutofuandme / 02/14/2013 at 2:39am / United States (California) / Transportation
Today, I got married on Skyrim. To an elf. While in real life, my love life is floundering like a half-dead carp in the surf on a hot day. So much so in fact that I actually draw a measure of comfort from being married to an elf. FML
by mr_loveless / 02/11/2013 at 2:19am / United States / Love
by dab1230 / 02/06/2013 at 7:26pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 02/05/2013 at 1:40am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
Today, while trucking, I got stuck in traffic on a congested highway. After 15 minutes of mind-numbing boredom, I glanced down at the car beside me, only to witness the driver changing her tampon and flicking the old one onto the highway. I can't unsee this. FML
by thoughtidseenitall / 02/01/2013 at 8:01pm / United States (Colorado) / Transportation
Today, I took my new girlfriend to meet my grandmother. We were drinking coffee when my gran leaned to one side and let out a huge fart. Proud of herself, she added, "That one didn't pay his rent on time!" Coffee came out of my girlfriend's nose. FML
by jay ze punk / 01/29/2013 at 2:56pm / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Love
by ohfuckwaffles / 01/29/2013 at 12:28am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
Today, on my shift as a nurse, I asked a pregnant woman what she would name her child. She said she saw the name "Chlamydia" on a billboard and decided to name her daughter that, saying it was "beautiful." I informed her that it was an STD, and she replied, "Oh, well no one knows that!" FML
by andy / 01/27/2013 at 11:36pm / United States (California) / Kids
Today, the police arrived at my door, telling me my child had been caught vandalizing. A boy who looked about 15 hugged me and said, "Hey, mum". I'm only 26 years old and had never seen this boy in my life. FML
by Female / 01/22/2013 at 6:16pm / Australia (Victoria) / Kids
by AnonCat / 01/20/2013 at 8:47pm / Canada (Alberta) / Animals
by Claire / 01/19/2013 at 8:51am / United States (Maryland) / Love
Today, as usual, my cat was sleeping on my stomach. I couldn't fall asleep so I delicately picked him up and put him down next to me. He got up, hopped back onto me, gave me a slap and then went back to sleep on my stomach. I didn't dare move all night. FML
by Anonymous / 01/18/2013 at 5:50am / United States / Intimacy
by walkingdictionary / 01/17/2013 at 9:31pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
- Today, my boyfriend whispered to me, “I’m so tired of these fucking mosquitos.” When I asked why he… Today, I live in Romania and my walls are particularly thin. After enduring my neighbor’s parties,… Today, I’m on a mission in Africa. My company driver is so old, deaf and half blind that I have to…