About ImDaMommy : Kayla Jere' OUT!
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ImDaMommy's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 05/11/2012 at 3:30pm / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Kids
by Anonymous / 11/16/2011 at 9:24pm / United States (Texas) / Transportation
Today, I was using the toilet and decided to check out some FMLs. One made me laugh out loud as my room-mate was passing by the bathroom. He now tells everyone my penis is so small it makes even me laugh every time I see it. FML
by Anonymous / 10/06/2011 at 12:17pm / Canada / Intimacy
Today, my family came to see me in my first acting role in Romeo and Juliet. It all went reasonably well for the first half hour or so, after which my seemingly shitfaced aunt started heckling and saying "that's what she said" after every line, before eventually being thrown out by security. FML
by Mandy / 09/16/2011 at 8:25pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work
by InAnAwkwardSituation / 08/25/2011 at 1:26am / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 01/15/2011 at 8:34pm / United States (Maryland) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 12/04/2010 at 1:50am / Singapore / Kids
by Anonymous / 10/17/2010 at 1:55am / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy
by life sucks / 05/20/2010 at 1:12am / United States (Texas) / Love
by anonymous / 03/09/2010 at 1:43am / Australia (Victoria) / Love
Today, while taking a shower, I saw shadows moving across the curtains. The shadow turned out to be a cricket that then fell into the tub. I ran out of the bathroom screaming and naked. My little sister came to my door and said, "If I hadn't just seen your balls, I would swear mom had TWO daughters." FML
by Anonymous / 12/11/2009 at 8:03pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by Mom / 07/25/2009 at 5:14pm / United States (Kentucky) / Kids
Today, I was volunteering at a school. There's this really bratty boy there and he was being rude, so I joked, "How are you ever gonna get a girlfriend when you're so mean?" He responds, "I think the better question is how are you ever gonna get a boyfriend when you're so ugly." He's 7. FML
by ugly / 04/07/2009 at 7:34pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids
Today, my nephew asked me how babies are made. I thought he'd had this chat with his mom, but I went in to it again. After a 20 minute 'discussion', he says "So what about the good stuff - get to the blowjobs and the lesbians." He's 11. FML
by epistaxis / 01/28/2009 at 9:31pm / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy
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- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…
- Today, I woke up early. As I was just about to fall back asleep, I was re-awoken to the sound of my… Today, my boyfriend came to wake me up with some flowers and breakfast in bed. We started getting… Today, the love of my life sent me a text saying "touch my pork". Somehow I don't think my feelings…
- Today, I threw up when I got home because I'd been drinking with friends. My parents asked what was… Today, I truly understood that I was in Germany when, in my workplace, during our lunch break, one… Today, on my way home to Bordeaux after a weekend in Paris, I had the pleasure of being sat next to…