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Ilydarling

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Ilydarling
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6443
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Ilydarling's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to what sounded like twigs snapping. Turns out it was the skull of a live mouse being crushed in my cat's jaws. FML

#19374662
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16658) - you deserved it (1634)

On 03/30/2012 at 3:45am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my house caught on fire. The firefighters said that it was caused by a lit cigarette on the carpet. I don't smoke, but apparently my 13 year old son does. FML

#19370101
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25706) - you deserved it (2399)

On 03/29/2012 at 2:29pm - misc - by no one - United States (Texas)

Today, I got so bored that I ordered my DVD drawer from awesomest to non-awesomest. I need a life. FML

#19368878
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11830) - you deserved it (5314)

On 03/29/2012 at 7:46am - misc - by melonhead77 - Cyprus

Today, I got so bored that I ordered my DVD drawer from awesomest to non-awesomest. I need a life. FML

#19368878
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11830) - you deserved it (5314)

On 03/29/2012 at 7:46am - misc - by melonhead77 - Cyprus

Today, I got so bored that I ordered my DVD drawer from awesomest to non-awesomest. I need a life. FML

#19368878
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11830) - you deserved it (5314)

On 03/29/2012 at 7:46am - misc - by melonhead77 - Cyprus

Today, I spotted a $100 bill on the ground. Being a little strapped for cash, I excitedly picked it up. I discovered it was one of those religious tract papers made to look like a folded bill, with a message scolding me for being greedy. FML

#19328317
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20483) - you deserved it (2992)

On 03/22/2012 at 7:32pm - misc - by Anon (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I found a bug under my foreskin. FML

#19318409
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27362) - you deserved it (18126)

On 03/21/2012 at 12:50am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I found a bug under my foreskin. FML

#19318409
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27362) - you deserved it (18126)

On 03/21/2012 at 12:50am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I went to see a dinosaur exhibition with my mum. We walked around and saw a huge dinosaur, made of plastic and rubber. She was very disappointed, saying that she thought there would be real live dinosaurs for us to see. FML

#19309330
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22369) - you deserved it (1957)

On 03/19/2012 at 7:43pm - animals - by bibi (woman) - Slovenia (Bohinj)

Today, I watched as my step-dad put locks on my window, because he's convinced that I've been sneaking out at night. All my mom did was casually remark that I'm fucked if there's ever a fire. FML

#19301577
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25959) - you deserved it (2473)

On 03/18/2012 at 4:02pm - misc - by Rapunzel (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, a bunch of my friends have been accepted to various colleges while I've been denied to the past 5. To cheer me up, my mom drove me to McDonald's. While we were in the drive-thru, she asked them if they had any job openings. FML

#19298670
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25620) - you deserved it (4486)

On 03/18/2012 at 3:07am - misc - by pwib - United States (California)

Today, while I was cuddling with my girlfriend, she looked at me and leaned in. Thinking she was going to kiss me, I leaned too. Just as we were about to kiss, she screamed "COW KISSES" and somehow managed to lick my eyeball. FML

#19297004
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25478) - you deserved it (4315)

On 03/17/2012 at 10:32pm - love - by Brian - United States (Washington)

Today, while I was cuddling with my girlfriend, she looked at me and leaned in. Thinking she was going to kiss me, I leaned too. Just as we were about to kiss, she screamed "COW KISSES" and somehow managed to lick my eyeball. FML

#19297004
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25478) - you deserved it (4315)

On 03/17/2012 at 10:32pm - love - by Brian - United States (Washington)

Today, I was laying down in bed when my puppy decided to bite my ear. As I started laughing and pulling him off I noticed one of my $200 earrings got pulled off with it. And now I wait. FML

#19293168
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25986) - you deserved it (4533)

On 03/17/2012 at 10:16am - misc - by lizzie1833 - United States (Ohio)

Today, my doctor booked me in for an STD test. I was feeling confident until he explained it will involve having a catheter inserted into my piss pipe. He shook his head sadly and said: "Gonna be honest, Steve, the pain's beyond belief." Great. FML

#19284993
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24588) - you deserved it (4568)

On 03/15/2012 at 9:18pm - intimacy - by 0stvn0 (man) - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)



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