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Iknoweverything

Offline (the 04/29/2014 at 12:16am) | Search for a member

Iknoweverything

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 5 November 1980 (34 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3115
  • Number of comments : 421
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 108 posted

About Iknoweverything : 1)My username was made because I believe in looking up thoughts before stating them as fact. Yes, I know I don't know everything. Clearly it was a bad choice, and I can't change it, so get over it.
2)Life is not black or white. You may see things one way, I may see it completely different. This does not make one of us wrong, but rather offers different perspectives. Most people on here don't seem to understand that. Just because you have a gut feeling doesn't mean it's right.
3)I don't believe "you're a dumbass" is a valid rebuttal. If you think I'm wrong, tell me why I'm wrong. Attacking me because you disagree is merely fallacious. (It's called the ad hominem fallacy)
4)"Break up with the jerk" and "Quit your job" is nice in theory. In reality, OP's may love their jerks, and probably have bills to pay.
5)I rarely read responses to my comments. If you wish to insult me, hit me up on the private messenger. I need entertainment.

Iknoweverything's page activity

Visits<b>Ingalls9</b> - 15 hours ago<b>xSLEEPYxHEADx</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 10:32pm<b>Machified</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 1:58am<b>charissaoz</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 6:41pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 3:49pm<b>Roaryah</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 8:29pm<b>abattior</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 10:40pm<b>cjsparrow96</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 12:52am<b>max5692</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 12:33am<b>Ciarasdfghjkl_</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 1:08pm<b>thisguy184</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 7:52pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 6:30am<b>yehyeh</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 10:24pm<b>spiers1</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 2:37am<b>hexblot</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 4:51am<b>RabbidIbanez</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 1:32am<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 02/04/2014 at 2:48am<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/18/2014 at 3:36pm

Iknoweverything's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

See all of Iknoweverything's badges

Iknoweverything's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a concert with my girlfriend. Some guy grabbed her ass, and I tried to fight him. I ended up with a concussion and a messed up jaw. Her? Oh, she beat the shit out of him while I was unconscious. FML

#20435818
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40318) - you deserved it (13551)

On 01/01/2013 at 5:30am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)

Today, some beefed-up guy wearing a wife-beater sat in my restaurant, took out a big sack of coins, and played My Little Pony songs on the jukebox for 4 hours straight. I couldn't summon the courage to tell him to leave. FML

#20401192
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22687) - you deserved it (5245)

On 12/15/2012 at 7:57pm - work - by lingling (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I went to see a movie with three of my friends, and I was sharing popcorn with one of them. Halfway through the movie, my friend asked me why I wasn't eating our popcorn. I then realised I'd been taking popcorn from the man sitting next to me. FML

#20160393
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25321) - you deserved it (7561)

On 11/12/2012 at 12:27pm - misc - by mm (woman) - United Kingdom (Warrington)

Today, I had surgery on my arm. My mom has recently had the same surgery and my dad is having his first rib removed and won't be able to move his arm. My family combined now has three functioning arms. FML

#20142449
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21417) - you deserved it (1472)

On 11/01/2012 at 1:08am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML

#20128322
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29745) - you deserved it (4521)

On 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm - kids - by thebeachisthatway (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my dog overturned and ate my trash, leaving coffee grounds and dog puke all over my floor. She also ate the broom. FML

#20111523
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17739) - you deserved it (2405)

On 10/11/2012 at 1:08am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to my cat meowing, with her dilated vagina in my face, giving birth to her first litter of kittens. FML

#20099894
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35662) - you deserved it (4845)

On 10/03/2012 at 12:29pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I found out that I'm not actually allergic to chocolate, when my mom freely admitted to me that she made it up when I was a child because she didn't want to share any cookies with me. FML

#20049241
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32781) - you deserved it (1685)

On 08/30/2012 at 8:58am - misc - by Sarah - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that my crush didn't remember calling me beautiful, telling me he liked me, or any of the other romantic things he said to me while drunk last night. He did however remember me promising to bake him cookies. FML

Today, I was driving down a dark country road with the windows down. Suddenly, a giant barn owl flew through my side-window and smacked into my head, causing me to drive into a ditch. FML

#20008924
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24882) - you deserved it (2410)

On 08/08/2012 at 1:59am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I left my sunroof on my truck open for 5 minutes while I ran into the bank. When I came out a seagull had gotten into my truck. I managed to open the doors and get it out but not before it tore up a seat and pooped everywhere inside my truck. FML

#19914260
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19833) - you deserved it (6502)

On 07/09/2012 at 11:44am - misc - by seagull hater - United States (California)

Today, my daughter's hamster pulled the water bottle off the glass, so I decided to super-glue the bottle back on. We came back an hour later to see if it had stuck, only to find both the bottle and rodent glued to the glass. FML

#19875784
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7512) - you deserved it (24090)

On 07/01/2012 at 11:59am - animals - by mommabuser -

Today, I slammed my middle finger in a drawer. I screamed and my mom came running into the kitchen. She asked me what was wrong, so without thinking I stuck up my middle finger. She hasn't spoken to me since this morning. FML

#19848843
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24886) - you deserved it (5347)

On 06/26/2012 at 2:05am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was reading erotic literature and noticed several errors in syntax, resulting in my mood being killed. I was cockblocked by my need for grammatical correctness. FML

#19799691
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23150) - you deserved it (10600)

On 06/17/2012 at 12:53am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was reading erotic literature and noticed several errors in syntax, resulting in my mood being killed. I was cockblocked by my need for grammatical correctness. FML

#19799691
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23150) - you deserved it (10600)

On 06/17/2012 at 12:53am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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