About Iknoweverything : 1)My username was made because I believe in looking up thoughts before stating them as fact. Yes, I know I don't know everything. Clearly it was a bad choice, and I can't change it, so get over it.
2)Life is not black or white. You may see things one way, I may see it completely different. This does not make one of us wrong, but rather offers different perspectives. Most people on here don't seem to understand that. Just because you have a gut feeling doesn't mean it's right.
3)I don't believe "you're a dumbass" is a valid rebuttal. If you think I'm wrong, tell me why I'm wrong. Attacking me because you disagree is merely fallacious. (It's called the ad hominem fallacy)
4)"Break up with the jerk" and "Quit your job" is nice in theory. In reality, OP's may love their jerks, and probably have bills to pay.
5)I rarely read responses to my comments. If you wish to insult me, hit me up on the private messenger. I need entertainment.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
One ring to rule them all
You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.
Today, I had surgery on my arm. My mom has recently had the same surgery and my dad is having his first rib removed and won't be able to move his arm. My family combined now has three functioning arms. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16565) - you deserved it (1146)
On 11/01/2012 at 1:08am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)
Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22256) - you deserved it (3161)
On 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm - kids - by thebeachisthatway (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to my cat meowing, with her dilated vagina in my face, giving birth to her first litter of kittens. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28334) - you deserved it (4127)
On 10/03/2012 at 12:29pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I found out that I'm not actually allergic to chocolate, when my mom freely admitted to me that she made it up when I was a child because she didn't want to share any cookies with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27048) - you deserved it (1361)
On 08/30/2012 at 8:58am - misc - by Sarah - United States (New York)
Today, I found out that my crush didn't remember calling me beautiful, telling me he liked me, or any of the other romantic things he said to me while drunk last night. He did however remember me promising to bake him cookies. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16302) - you deserved it (1793)
On 08/25/2012 at 2:53am - misc - by coolcocoxxx (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was driving down a dark country road with the windows down. Suddenly, a giant barn owl flew through my side-window and smacked into my head, causing me to drive into a ditch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18849) - you deserved it (1623)
On 08/08/2012 at 1:59am - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I left my sunroof on my truck open for 5 minutes while I ran into the bank. When I came out a seagull had gotten into my truck. I managed to open the doors and get it out but not before it tore up a seat and pooped everywhere inside my truck. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14960) - you deserved it (4616)
On 07/09/2012 at 11:44am - misc - by seagull hater - United States (California)
Today, my daughter's hamster pulled the water bottle off the glass, so I decided to super-glue the bottle back on. We came back an hour later to see if it had stuck, only to find both the bottle and rodent glued to the glass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5409) - you deserved it (15553)
On 07/01/2012 at 11:59am - animals - by mommabuser -
Today, I slammed my middle finger in a drawer. I screamed and my mom came running into the kitchen. She asked me what was wrong, so without thinking I stuck up my middle finger. She hasn't spoken to me since this morning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18646) - you deserved it (3827)
On 06/26/2012 at 2:05am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was reading erotic literature and noticed several errors in syntax, resulting in my mood being killed. I was cockblocked by my need for grammatical correctness. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17085) - you deserved it (9080)
On 06/17/2012 at 12:53am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I was reading erotic literature and noticed several errors in syntax, resulting in my mood being killed. I was cockblocked by my need for grammatical correctness. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17085) - you deserved it (9080)
On 06/17/2012 at 12:53am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I was chatting to a co-worker, upon whom I have a serious crush. It was going really well, until he said "irregardless", as if it's actually a proper word. This grammatical abomination really ticks me off, and I actually had to fight back the urge to beat some damn sense into him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8078) - you deserved it (20801)
On 06/13/2012 at 7:50pm - love - by Rebecca (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I asked my girlfriend why she never lets me in her house. She stared blankly and said, "What is inside is not for thine eyes." I told her best friend about this creepiness later on. She sighed and said, "T'was not for mine eyes either. I didst fail to listen." I feel like I'm losing my mind here. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18761) - you deserved it (2420)
On 06/11/2012 at 5:45pm - love - by amidreaming?? (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I went to the circus with my family. When we were looking at the animals during the break, an elephant took my purse with his trunk and ate it. It crushed my cellphone, camera, keys and wallet. After that, the circus director yelled at me for feeding poisonous stuff to his elephant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22518) - you deserved it (4117)
On 06/11/2012 at 3:14am - animals - by ILoveAnimals (woman) - Austria (Wien)
Today, I was having a debate with my friend, who actually believes karma is real. He got very angry with me and stormed off, tripping over his own feet in the process. I laughed and asked what he'd done in a past life to deserve that one. He responded by getting up and punching me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6904) - you deserved it (23504)
On 06/07/2012 at 5:26pm - health - by sh3n-D (man) - Denmark (Midtjylland)
Monday 20 May 2013
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