Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Idonebeenhad

Search for a member

Idonebeenhad

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 22 August 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5629
  • Number of comments : 297
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 25 posted

About Idonebeenhad :
I love doctor who, grey's anatomy, battlestar galactica, and house. Fave bands are MCR, all time low, story of the year, paramore, and the red jumpsuit apparatus.

Is that all your stalkin' self needs to know about me? No? Okay, leave me a message; I probably won't reply.

PS: That old saying, "better to have loved than never to have loved at all" is, at least in my opinion, complete and utter bullshit.

Idonebeenhad's page activity

Visits<b>toomanyidiots</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 4:40pm<b>silbot</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 5:48am<b>LiveLoveLacrosse</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 9:28am<b>Princessuuke</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 10:25pm<b>drumguy218</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 9:45pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 4:42pm<b>Budderchook</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 10:17am<b>imkidding</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 1:46pm<b>sammyjo06</b> - the 03/17/2014 at 2:18am<b>Spellsman</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 11:51am<b>why_teh_hell</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 12:13am<b>Serquet70</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 8:29am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 2:03pm<b>michelleJ11</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 7:57pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/09/2014 at 5:31am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 9:04pm<b>ervnomyous</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 11:22am<b>xDochx</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 11:42pm

Idonebeenhad's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

See all of Idonebeenhad's badges

Idonebeenhad's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw my brother's pregnant girlfriend smoking. Disgusted, I asked him why he didn't just stab her in the uterus and get it over with. He laughed like it was a joke, then cussed because he spilled his cereal. He's more concerned about spilled cereal than having a brain-damaged child. FML

#17424744
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32480) - you deserved it (9052)

On 08/10/2011 at 12:46am - health - by auntoftheyear - United States (Louisiana)

Today, a fight broke out in a bar between several people, over some talk about one of their moms being somewhat inclined towards intercourse with her pets. I managed to slip out quietly with just a scratch from flying chair debris, despite having started the rumor. FML

#17376503
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7334) - you deserved it (61076)

On 08/05/2011 at 10:05am - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, while stuck in traffic on the highway, my 5 year old in the back seat asked me why the man in the car next to us was pulling on the other man's "peepee". FML

#17361677
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43586) - you deserved it (2767)

On 08/04/2011 at 12:04am - intimacy - by whatnot - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was texting my boyfriend. He continued to tell me how he had to piss. We carried on this conversation for about 10 minutes, then I realized that was the most interesting conversation I have had with him in weeks. FML

#17352366
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24270) - you deserved it (5616)

On 08/03/2011 at 3:47am - love - by Cow_girl_cutie - United States (California)

Today, my mom decided to give me a bloodcurdlingly graphic sex talk. On a plane. I'm 23. FML

#17343127
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29626) - you deserved it (2490)

On 08/02/2011 at 12:26pm - misc - by jared77 - United States (Texas)

Today, while walking home from work, a young teenage girl ran up behind me and dumped a carton of milk on my head. She said, "The cow master baptizes you!" and then ran in the opposite direction, cackling madly. FML

#17301663
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33585) - you deserved it (3653)

On 07/29/2011 at 8:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, it was hot out, so I opted to stay cool and wear my bathing suit all day. My mom took it as me rubbing in the fact that I'm thinner than her and grounded me. FML

#17242973
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35143) - you deserved it (5069)

On 07/24/2011 at 4:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, a group of girl-scouts came to my door selling chocolate bars. I bought 2 bars and smiled as they left, thinking I'd done a good deed. When the door closed, I heard one of the girls say, "Told you, the fat bitches always wanna buy from us." FML

#17172932
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41017) - you deserved it (6285)

On 07/19/2011 at 2:24am - kids - by hatemylife - United States (New York)

Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML

#17109043
426 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30575) - you deserved it (89082)

On 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by gir - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML

#17088739
429 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73687) - you deserved it (7679)

On 07/13/2011 at 1:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my 16 year-old daughter tried to convince me that tampons don't actually work, all because she can still pee with one in. FML

#17069716
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31905) - you deserved it (5181)

On 07/11/2011 at 6:23pm - misc - by Username - United States (Washington)

Today, my daughter announced on Facebook that she is directly descended from extra-terrestrials. That would be okay - except she's 25 and believes it's true. FML

#17060608
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26001) - you deserved it (3981)

On 07/11/2011 at 12:23am - kids - by MotherofET (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my wife actually had the balls to tell me that we can't have sex for the rest of her nine month pregnancy, because according to her, "I don't want twins." FML

#17004643
391 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39769) - you deserved it (10810)

On 07/06/2011 at 7:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my daughter was charged with multiple counts of vandalism and trespassing. It seems she's been sneaking out in the middle of the night, stealing and breaking our neighbors' lawn ornaments. Specifically garden gnomes. FML

#16837110
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25884) - you deserved it (6515)

On 06/24/2011 at 5:22pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my friend sent me an online money transfer. After forgetting the password and locking myself out of my account, I had to phone up the bank and have it reset. I was prompted to answer the security question, which was "What, what?" I had to say "In the butt." to get my money. FML

#16661334
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12639) - you deserved it (57880)

On 06/14/2011 at 1:57pm - money - by notinthebutt (woman) - United States (Minnesota)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: