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Idiotskillme's favorite FMLs
by rhymehoardhh / 03/04/2016 at 8:41pm / United States (Texas) / Money
Today, my neighbor - whose first words to me when I moved onto the block were "I don't like your face" - called the cops and claimed I'd been exposing myself in public. His lowlife buddy backed him up on his lie. I'm pretty sure I'm going to end up in deep trouble thanks to them. FML
by Anonymous / 02/20/2016 at 7:16am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/31/2015 at 1:55pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/18/2015 at 9:50am / Canada / Health
by Darth Spasticus / 11/14/2015 at 4:12am / United States (Texas) / Health
Today, my girlfriend dumped me after I told her I found out I have diabetes. She thought it was an STD and I had cheated on her. So I explained what it really was and she dumped me again because she didn't want her future children to inherit my fucked up DNA. FML
by Guy / 09/28/2015 at 2:49pm / Romania (Bucuresti) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boss told me I have to start work 4 hours early tomorrow, because that my coworker, who happens to be his son, will not be coming in because he's "too tired". I work 10 hours a day, 6 days a week without complaining. His son works two 4-hour shifts a week. FML
by nepotwatism @ its finest / 09/23/2015 at 11:05am / Sweden (Hallands Lan) / Work
Today, while at work, a customer, who was also on his phone, rudely asked what kinds of bread we had for his sandwich. After I told him we had many different kinds to offer, he cut me off, told me to stop playing stupid, and stormed out after holding up a long line of people. FML
by breadcrumb / 07/06/2015 at 2:03am / United States (Missouri) / Work
Today, I asked my boyfriend to come hang out with me. He said he was busy and had to do homework. Since he never studies, I got suspicious and went to check up on him. I found him playing dress-up with his cat. He's 17. FML
by iamfab / 06/06/2015 at 1:52am / Australia (Queensland) / Animals
Today, I wanted to try seducing my boyfriend by having nothing but a t-shirt on for when he'd get back from work. He came home, saw me, apologized bashfully for failing to knock first, and went back outside. FML
by oops / 03/27/2014 at 7:10pm / United States (California) / Love
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