Icalasari

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Icalasari

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 69573
  • Number of comments : 187
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

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Icalasari's page activity

Visits<b>punxsy_phil</b> - the 06/09/2016 at 8:49am<b>amyfann</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 3:34am<b>jill97</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 2:39am<b>Misskreher</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 5:21pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 5:07pm<b>amadeclton</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 10:02am<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 10:22am<b>thatsaucylife</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 1:46am<b>DepartmentStore</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 7:50am<b>acdb4</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 4:23pm<b>notapotato</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 12:51pm<b>Epikouros</b> - the 09/21/2011 at 1:02pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 1:02am<b>iztrollinnn</b> - the 02/16/2010 at 6:04pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 09/29/2009 at 11:27pm<b>thisismylife007</b> - the 06/15/2009 at 5:36am<b>ChunkyMyster</b> - the 06/09/2009 at 3:24am<b>jpi13</b> - the 06/07/2009 at 1:57am

Icalasari's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Icalasari's favorite FMLs

Today, I texted my boyfriend to see if he wanted to finally have sex today. His response was "Can't, Platinum just came out." I didn't know what that meant so I searched "Platinum 3-22-2009" on Google. I found out he's talking about a new Pokémon game. FML

by thisreallysucks2 / 03/22/2009 at 10:15pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my parents were out so I invited my girlfriend over. It was the afternoon, and things started to heat up. We were having sex, and I was about to finish. Then I looked through the window, to see a construction worker (who was fixing the house next to mine) giving me a thumbs up. He's her dad. FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2009 at 9:04am / Malta / Intimacy

Today, I slept over at my friend's house but forgot my glasses. When I woke up in the morning, I came out of his room and forcefully kicked what I thought was a soccer ball on the floor. Turns out it was his miniature poodle - it fell down a long flight of stairs. FML

by JohnMackSquirts / 03/19/2009 at 1:15am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I got a phone call saying I was no longer a bridesmaid for a wedding in June. It's my mom's 4th wedding. I'm getting replaced by our dog. FML

by Noname / 03/16/2009 at 10:41pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I was on the subway. I have fairly serious OCD, so I avoided holding the poles or handles. All the seats were taken, so I leaned against a wall. At the next stop, an obese, sweaty man got on and grabbed the two poles around me, effectively hugging me. My shirt was wet when he left. FML

by Anon / 03/13/2009 at 12:00am / United States (New Jersey) / Transportation

Today, I called a priest "lame". He responded jokingly with "God will smite you!" I laughed and walked out the door. I tripped and broke my ankle. FML

by lolzor / 03/12/2009 at 8:07am / Australia (Queensland) / Health

Today, I fell asleep in the car on a 10+ hour trip with my family as soon as we got on the highway. When I woke up an hour later, I realized I'd had a wet dream. I had to sit next to my grandma with semen all over my thighs and boxers for the rest of the trip. FML

by MoneyMike / 03/11/2009 at 8:30pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I bought a parakeet for my kids. When I got home and presented it to them, they wanted to let him fly around inside. We went around the house making sure all the windows and doors were shut. Unfortunately I forgot to turn off the ceiling fan. FML

by Noname / 03/10/2009 at 8:10pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, a guy informed me that the cute, really tiny little leather bracelet with little silver hearts and several snaps that I'd found in a head shop is actually a cock ring. I'm a girl. FML

by fashionVictim / 03/08/2009 at 4:35pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was looking at some comments on a silly YouTube video of me dancing with some friends. Someone posted a comment saying "Girl on the right is hot!!!." Next to that, it had about 31 thumbs down. I'm the girl on the right. FML

by Ugly / 03/08/2009 at 4:47am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I bragged to a coworker that our boss compliments me constantly on my work performance, my fashion sense, and my trustworthiness. She then directed me to a "neighborhood watch" website. My boss is a registered sex offender. FML

by Kat / 03/08/2009 at 12:47am / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, my dad woke me up at 6 told me to take a shower and drove me to school only to say "just kidding, happy snowday!" FML

by EPICfml. / 03/02/2009 at 2:01pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I fell asleep. I felt something on my face. I batted it away. It was my hamster. It died from a concussion upon hitting the wall. FML

by EpicFail / 02/04/2009 at 6:29pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals

Today, I promised my best friend I wouldn't let her hook up with any guys (she got an STD a few weeks ago). After we tossed a few back she led about 30 people in a chant of "cockblock" after I wouldnt let her go home with some random dude. FML

by cockblockingbitch / 01/25/2009 at 12:54am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy