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Offline (the 09/27/2016 at 4:55am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 19 August 1983 (33 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1654
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About IantoJones : The 21st century is when everything changes...and you've got to be ready.

IantoJones's page activity

Visits<b>shadowbacca</b> - the 08/19/2016 at 5:31pm<b>captain_crook</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 7:55pm<b>microwave19</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 12:22am<b>etishuman22</b> - the 05/16/2013 at 5:44pm<b>yellowchocobo</b> - the 05/12/2013 at 7:19am<b>mybarra6</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 8:17am

IantoJones's FML badges


You see, sonny boy, moderating FMLs is a bit like running a marathon.


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You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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IantoJones's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss informed me I couldn't go on my "vacation" because he's leaving for one of his employees' weddings. That just so happens to be my wedding, for which I'm taking the vacation. FML

by bruhandbutercup / 02/02/2015 at 7:08pm / United States (Maryland) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went to have a pre-cancerous mole removed off of my nose. When the doctor numbed my nose, she didn't check to see if the anesthetic actually worked, and began hacking away at my nose, leaving me to feel every last flick of the razor. Turns out I have an immunity to that anesthetic. FML

by ThatWasntFun / 01/29/2015 at 4:00pm / United States (Florida) / Health

Today, I babysat an 11 year old kid while his parents ate out. As soon as they left, the kid asked me if I wanted to be on the sex offender's list. Before I could even process that, he told me to stay out of his way and he wouldn't accuse me of anything. FML

by Anonymous / 01/21/2015 at 6:57am / United States (Michigan) / Kids

Today, I texted my boyfriend a few dirty messages at lunch time and told him how badly I wanted him home. He texted back lecturing me on how I shouldn't be so drunk so early. I was totally sober, but now I need a drink. FML

by fun in functioning, I suppose / 01/20/2015 at 2:54pm / United States (Mississippi) / Intimacy

Today, I got a gift-wrapped package in the mail from my racist mother-in-law. She's always hated me, so I thought it was a bit strange. Inside was a squirt gun and a note telling me to take my "black ass" for a walk around a police station with it, followed with a smiley face. FML

by Anonymous / 12/28/2014 at 1:41pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boss sent me a Word document that he wanted me to make into a PowerPoint presentation for him. It was a set of proposals for the board of directors about cost-saving options. The third option was to eliminate my position in the company. FML

by HALIFAAA / 12/28/2014 at 8:56am / Germany (Niedersachsen) / Work

Today, my mom got me a Christmas present. Since I'm a whovian, she thought it would be cool to get me what she thought was a sonic screwdriver. It was actually a dildo shaped as one. I opened the gift in front of my entire family. FML

by whovian / 12/25/2014 at 10:17am / United States (Maine) / Intimacy

Today, I was yelled at in public for staring at a guy in a wheelchair. I was staring 'cause he was so good looking. FML

by anonymous / 12/23/2014 at 6:28am / Austria (Wien) / Miscellaneous

Today, my work department set a new sales record, something not done in nearly 30 years. It's corporate policy to give a bonus to each worker responsible as a reward. Our manager decided our "bonuses" would be plastic medals from Dollar Tree. He didn't even buy enough for everybody. FML

by anon / 12/05/2014 at 10:44am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, my family and I were celebrating my dad's birthday. The two of us were standing by the pool chatting, and I jokingly said "You're old now." I suppose I should have expected him to shove me into the pool, my phone still in hand, and retort, "You're soaked now." FML

by fuck you, dad / 02/08/2014 at 3:54pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my car window got smashed, because someone somehow confused the doll my daughter always leaves strapped into a carseat for an actual kid. It's a cabbage patch kid. FML

by mother to an ugly doll / 09/04/2013 at 2:10pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids

Today, the guy that I've liked for a while but never had the courage to talk to was wearing a TARDIS shirt. I jokingly asked, "Are you the Doctor?" His response was for me to "Go away, f***ing nerd." FML

by guessnot / 02/03/2013 at 9:16pm / Canada (Ontario) / Geek

Today, I saw a large spider carry away the body of a dead spider in the bathroom. In my anthropology class, we learned one of the first signs of civilization is caring for the dead. First, they become civilized, and next, they take over. I will never sleep again. FML

by BloodFaerie / 06/30/2012 at 2:49am / United States (Georgia) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I corrected someone who spelled "learned" as "learnt" on my favorite forum. Nothing could've prepared me for the torrent of abuse that followed from the non-American members. Now I'm banned for "trolling," and all my 7,000+ posts since 2006 are gone forever. FML

by Anonymous / 05/08/2012 at 6:10pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was feeling frisky for the first time in months, so I started feeling up my husband. He kept insisting he had a headache and that he wasn't feeling it tonight. When I noticed his sarcasm, he said "Yeah, doesn't feel so great, does it?" and turned the TV volume up. FML

by Anonymous / 02/24/2012 at 10:07pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy