Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Ian_from_0070

Online | Search for a member

Ian_from_0070

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3107
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Ian_from_0070 : I play guitar. 12 string 6 string and 6string electric. I row for a sport and enjoy listening to music

Ian_from_0070's page activity

Visits<b>rengoonhoo</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 4:42pm<b>allirein369</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 5:48pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 8:33pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 1:22pm<b>annapanda143</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 2:04am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 1:34pm<b>thatonelosergirl</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 11:02pm<b>windell</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 5:58pm<b>BBeffedmylife</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 3:51pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 8:31pm<b>AlliTheKat</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 3:43am<b>Crystal_Nicole</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 3:40pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 6:52pm<b>aly_fml</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 9:23am<b>ChenEighty</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 10:20am<b>casual_commenter</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 7:35am<b>covertamerica</b> - the 01/31/2014 at 4:22am<b>smallzz993</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 2:03pm

Ian_from_0070's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Ian_from_0070's badges

Ian_from_0070's favorite FMLs

Today, a calf kicked a needle straight into my arm hard enough to make me stab myself. The good news is I'm now fully vaccinated for cow diseases. FML

Today, at work, a good song came on and I started dancing to it. I guess security thought my Michael Jackson crotch-grab was funny, because a printout of it is now pinned in our break room. FML

#21351356
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24615) - you deserved it (10236)

On 02/07/2015 at 4:09am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boss said he's worried about our network, because "Wifi's all in the air. People could spy on us from anywhere!" I sarcastically said "My god, you're right!" and suggested switching to tin-foil ethernet cables to stop the signal escaping. He told me to do it ASAP. This moron makes five times my salary. FML

#21302784
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34042) - you deserved it (3909)

On 11/20/2014 at 3:15pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I realized that I ran out of deodorant. On top of that, I was late to work so I had to run, making me all sweaty and smelly. To cover it up, I used the air-freshener in the toilet at work. Everyone recognized the "Lemon Tree" scent and now all of my colleagues think I'm a cheap bastard. FML

#21302617
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28318) - you deserved it (6325)

On 11/20/2014 at 6:32am - health - by LemonTree (man) - Hungary

Today, I went skiing. On the first run of the day, a little girl came out of nowhere and crashed into me. I was fine, but she was hurt, so I called the ski patrol. She told him that I deliberately hit her, and got me kicked out. I was there for 10 minutes. I paid for all day. FML

#21010566
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46754) - you deserved it (3244)

On 12/30/2013 at 3:28pm - health - by bad luck skier - United States (New York)

Today, some kids used firecrackers to blow up my mailbox. This is the third time this week. FML

#20961862
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38737) - you deserved it (3373)

On 11/18/2013 at 5:14am - kids - by kids next door - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my family got together for a big game of paintball. My grandpa wanted to play too, but I told him he was a bit too old for such a rough sport. He joined anyway, and spent the whole 2 hours hunting my dumb ass down. I'm now in constant pain after being riddled with paintballs. FML

#20941762
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21500) - you deserved it (50457)

On 11/01/2013 at 7:55pm - health - by nl4 (man) - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, I was maced. Not by a person, but rather by one of those automatic air fresheners in the bathroom. It was conveniently placed at eye level, you know, for freshness. FML

#20921961
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39473) - you deserved it (2835)

On 10/15/2013 at 8:38pm - health - by erockinthesuburb (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my weird neighbor is a conspiracy theorist and thinks the government is trying to kill him. Someone thought it would be funny to shine a red laser light through his window. I was on the stairs when he ran past, screaming bloody murder, sending me down a flight of steps. FML

#20919796
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44191) - you deserved it (3272)

On 10/14/2013 at 3:13am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, as I started my car, I heard the most horrific sounds coming from the engine. When I lifted the hood I realized I'd found my son's cat. FML

Today, I hooked up with the guy I've liked for a while, even though my friends joked that his large pickup truck meant that he was "compensating" for having a small penis. They were right. Very right. FML

#20876171
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55554) - you deserved it (12216)

On 09/10/2013 at 8:14pm - intimacy - by CityBoysNow - United States (Missouri)

Today, my little sister opened a lemonade stand in front of our house. Surprisingly, she actually had a lot of customers, all kids. Two hours or so later, some parents came back complaining and threatening to sue my family. Turns out that what we thought was lemonade was actually beer. FML

Today, at the pool, a kid no older than 8 was sitting on the diving board, not letting anyone else use it. I went over and tried to reason with him, but he wouldn't listen. My uncle stormed over, said "I got this!" and punted him over the edge. We both got thrown out for "bullying" the kid. FML

#20827779
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46515) - you deserved it (6221)

On 08/08/2013 at 7:03pm - kids - by JuggaloSlasher15 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had my first wet dream. I woke up sweating and soaking wet. Too bad I dreamed about having intense sex with a cardboard box. FML

#20813339
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53760) - you deserved it (8533)

On 07/31/2013 at 12:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Belgium (West-Vlaanderen)



FML's blog

  • Angie's illustrated FML
  • Here we go again. This week I'm talking to you live from the Paris Japan Expo. I'm dressed up as Bernard from the Sailor Moon series, and I almost got kicked out because my katana wasn't the…

Friday 3 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: