Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Iamnotfat

Offline (13 hours ago) | Search for a member

Iamnotfat

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3148
  • Number of comments : 24
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Iamnotfat : Just a guy who loves winter sports, and summer parties!

Iamnotfat's page activity

Visits<b>ninjuh_wingman</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 4:21pm<b>adamant84</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 3:41pm<b>QualityChrisTime</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 2:35pm<b>mimii00</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 1:01am<b>godlytomato</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 9:00pm<b>BBeffedmylife</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 7:12pm<b>candiicane</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 1:37pm<b>SirAnon</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 11:41am<b>flohsch</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 7:12am<b>tommylover842</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 6:26am<b>tygerarmy</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 12:28am<b>RainEliseWolf</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 12:10am<b>chattysoul890</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 11:49pm<b>blackdonkey</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 11:48pm<b>Ikashy73</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 11:28pm<b>Ltsdragons</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 10:27pm<b>gczizza1997</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 10:15pm<b>buckstop1</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 9:12pm

Iamnotfat's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of Iamnotfat's badges

Iamnotfat's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband was involved in a horrible series of accidents; he repeatedly slipped and fell into my best friend's vagina. FML

#21382840
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36300) - you deserved it (2543)

On 03/28/2015 at 5:20am - intimacy - by soontobewidow (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, I made a speech in front of my entire graduating class and their families, despite my fear of public speaking. It seemed to go well and I got a big round of applause at the end. Then I panicked and instead of waving, I lifted my arm straight out in a Hitler salute. FML

#21379710
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32027) - you deserved it (6495)

On 03/22/2015 at 8:32pm - misc - by oooooops (man) - United States

Today, a girl asked me to check out her left breast, which she said she'd found a strange lump on. I'm an orthodontist. FML

#21379225
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27251) - you deserved it (2970)

On 03/22/2015 at 12:03am - health - by noway - United States (California)

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend because I felt unappreciated. She found it appropriate to sarcastically say, "Oh no, how will I ever be able to open my jars?" FML

#21378617
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29273) - you deserved it (18)

On 03/20/2015 at 9:32pm - love - by tumbleshay - United States (Oregon)

Today, I jokingly sent my girlfriend a link to an article about giving better head. She didn't think it was funny, and has since sent me numerous articles about the female orgasm, and I just got a link to the Wikipedia article about the clitoris. FML

#21372045
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45) - you deserved it (45467)

On 03/10/2015 at 7:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I got my first handjob. I also found out today that a girl can pull your skin hard enough to cause it to bleed profusely. FML

#21371903
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33342) - you deserved it (3392)

On 03/10/2015 at 3:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, my little sister complained about a young boy in her class always pulling her hair. She asked when boys will stop doing it. My mom replied, "They won't, even when they're grown-ups," then looked over at my dad and shared a dirty smirk. FML

#21369959
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34820) - you deserved it (3218)

On 03/07/2015 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by greatly disturbed - United States (California)

Today, my son was at a birthday party. After eating a plate of cake, he loudly asked the birthday boy's mum if he could have sloppy seconds. I don't know where he heard that phrase, but the other kids' parents shot me very dirty looks. FML

#21369892
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27109) - you deserved it (2713)

On 03/07/2015 at 11:59am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I realized I hate my boyfriend's little sister enough to break up with him. FML

#21366485
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28355) - you deserved it (6397)

On 03/02/2015 at 11:31am - love - by sorry... - United States (Delaware)

Today, my girlfriend said she was going to start appreciating the little things in life. She's starting with my penis. FML

#21364983
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33806) - you deserved it (4935)

On 02/28/2015 at 12:03am - intimacy - by FreshDonuts (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, the doctor let me know I have an autoimmune disease. The disease results in ulcers in my colon which bleed when I poop. I cried, but only when I was told that I wouldn't be allowed to eat cheese anymore. FML

#21364143
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29883) - you deserved it (2659)

On 02/26/2015 at 7:20pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, away at college, I called my grandmother to hear how she was doing after her knee surgery. She ended up talking about Hooters and how I should work there because of my "rare body". When I mentioned I've been studying computer science, earning a 3.8 GPA, she replied, "But you're a girl." FML

#21361518
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34524) - you deserved it (2904)

On 02/23/2015 at 2:45am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of two years has a beautiful daughter. That's cool, except she's 1 year old. FML

#21360646
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33353) - you deserved it (2329)

On 02/21/2015 at 9:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a guy attacked me and tried to steal my bag. I tried to defend myself by biting him as hard as I could. I then woke up to my husband screaming in pain. FML

#21360466
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32986) - you deserved it (3904)

On 02/21/2015 at 3:28pm - misc - by poncho55 (woman) -

Today, I woke up to a phone with most of my female contacts missing. I think I'm dating a psycho. FML

#21359722
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33219) - you deserved it (4545)

On 02/20/2015 at 8:35am - love - by FunGhoost - United States (California)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: