About Iamnotfat : Just a guy who loves winter sports, and summer parties!
Iamnotfat's FML badges
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
Iamnotfat's favorite FMLs
by Bonngoo / 11/17/2016 at 1:17pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my class and I were discussing our country's relationship with other countries. One person stated that the French have never done anything for us. A classmate took that moment to chime in and ask, "I thought the French gave us that giant statue of the Mona Lisa?" He was dead serious. FML
by crazymentalblond / 11/17/2016 at 6:47am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work
Today, my ex-girlfriend from several years ago texted me. We were having a pleasant conversation until she asked me to give advice. Apparently, her current boyfriend is incapable of talking dirty, fingering, and other sexual aspects. She asked me to give him advice and pointers. FML
by KnowledgableEx / 11/10/2016 at 7:42am / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy
by Z / 11/06/2016 at 6:33pm / United States (Iowa) / Work
Today, I finally bought my first car after saving around £5000 and finding an absolute bargain that ticked all the boxes! Today was also the day of my first ever car accident, resulting in the car being written off by an uninsured driver. I had it less than 9 hours. FML
by One_Wheel_Wonder / 10/06/2016 at 11:36am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Transportation
Today, at work, I needed to fart and thought it would be fast and silent, so I let it rip. I was wrong. Everyone turned around and looked at me as my fart rolled on for a good 10 seconds. The worst part, I screamed, "It wasn't me!" while I was still farting. FML
by Anonymous / 07/23/2016 at 7:04pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was told that the $8,500 bill for my new water well grew to $11,000 because of a fair amount of overtime. I learned that the men I hired to drill the new well at our home were spending the overtime drilling my daughter as well. FML
by loserman67 / 07/18/2016 at 8:04am / Intimacy
by Heknowsnothing / 07/13/2016 at 5:09pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous
by Foot In Mouth / 07/12/2016 at 10:46pm / United States (Arkansas) / Work
Today, I thought my car was overheating. I then thought it was wise to put my hand close to my muffler to feel the heat. Needless to say, I stuck my entire hand on my muffler then had to drive around with the only cold thing in my car. A cold beer from my cooler. Yes, I got pulled over. FML
by leaannec30 / 07/10/2016 at 2:52pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation
Today, my best friend told me she's been in love with me for over 4 years. I'm getting married to the man of my dreams in a month and she's supposed to be my bridesmaid. "Awkward" doesn't even begin to describe our friendship right now. FML
by Mimo / 06/23/2016 at 6:18am / Egypt / Love
Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I said no, she started crying so much that her mom came out 5 minutes later and demanded that I give her daughter the dog. FML
by Anonymous / 06/21/2016 at 10:45pm / United States (Missouri) / Kids
by Spider fail / 05/31/2016 at 3:06pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/16/2016 at 12:48am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got…
- Today, I was on an adult-orientated website when my mother entered the room. I closed the webpage… Today, I found myself completely naked, tied to a chair with a slice of ham on each breast. Note to… Today, on my way home to Bordeaux after a weekend in Paris, I had the pleasure of being sat next to…