About I_Hug_Cats : Miauw.
About I_Hug_Cats : Miauw.
I_Hug_Cats's FML badges
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You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
I_Hug_Cats's favorite FMLs
by school issues / 03/28/2013 at 10:26am / United States / Work
Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML
by anonymous / 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm / United States (Hawaii) / Intimacy
by soontobesingle / 03/27/2013 at 3:55pm / United Kingdom (Dorset) / Love
Today, I was violently throwing up due to severe morning sickness. My boyfriend looked at me, then turned and walked away. In the end, my daughter gave me some paper towel and her juice. My 18-month-old is more supportive of my pregnancy than her 30-year-old father. FML
by InfamousLastWord / 03/27/2013 at 3:34pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/27/2013 at 12:54pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, I came home from a relaxing, peaceful vacation. When I got home my 4-year-old son was free-balling with poop all over his body, screaming "Bob the Builder will kick your ass." The baby sitter is nowhere to be found and I can't get him to stop saying, "I love ass." FML
by Anonymous / 03/27/2013 at 4:00am / United States (California) / Holidays
Today, a man attempted to sue my business for giving him food poisoning. I make soap. When I called the cops on him for disturbing the peace, I was told, "Maybe next time you'll put 'not edible' on your label." FML
by Anonymous / 03/26/2013 at 8:10pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work
by holycommander / 03/26/2013 at 4:20pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my boss threatened to fire me because of a tattoo I have. It's a small teddy bear on my leg with my parents' names on it. My workplace has no problems with tattoos, but my boss said it was "unoriginal and lame." It's a memorial tattoo; my parents died last year. FML
by Anonymous / 03/26/2013 at 10:54am / Finland (Southern Finland) / Work
Today, whilst texting my boyfriend on the train, I noticed the woman sitting next to me staring intently at my phone. After letting my boyfriend know, he sent a message saying, "Are we gonna involve the dog again? Last night was fun." She gasped and screamed that I'm a "twisted dog-humping bitch." FML
by Anonymous / 03/25/2013 at 8:28pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Animals
Today, at a romantic dinner my boyfriend was treating me to, the waiter brought a "Will you marry me?" cake out with candles and sparklers. I probably should have checked that they'd brought it to the right table before dramatically screaming "Yes!" and jumping into my boyfriend's arms. They hadn't. FML
by franky / 03/25/2013 at 5:45pm / Germany (Niedersachsen) / Love
by anon / 03/25/2013 at 2:31pm / United States / Health
Today, I was at a goodbye dinner with friends before I move back to America. A friend called to cry over relationship problems she refuses to fix. While I was outside trying to politely get off the phone, my friends ate and drank everything I'd ordered and closed the bill. FML
by sorryyouweregone / 03/25/2013 at 9:13am / Japan (Tokyo) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at my job, waiting tables. A fellow server and myself were given a party of 14 Bible thumpers. They left us $9.00 and a mini Bible after awesome service, telling us we did a great job. Unfortunately, Religion doesn't pay my car payment. FML
by PrayingForMoney / 03/25/2013 at 4:48am / United States (California) / Money
by Apes / 03/25/2013 at 3:18am / United States (California) / Animals
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…