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IStandInTheRain

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IStandInTheRain

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  • Number of visits : 1559
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 19 posted

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IStandInTheRain's favorite FMLs

Today, feeling melancholy, I took a blanket out to the backyard and lay down to look at the clouds. My dad came out to ask me what I was doing. I told him, he smirked, squatted over my face, and farted. He then ran back inside and told my mom. She laughed. FML

#14490240
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28957) - you deserved it (5680)

On 01/06/2011 at 9:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I fell and got a nasty cut above my right eye. The doctor in the ER sealed the wound with surgical glue. He also glued his glove to my eyebrow, and let glue run onto my eyelid. Not only do I have a scar and medical bill, I now have no eyebrow or eyelashes on my right eye. FML

#14488481
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29597) - you deserved it (2115)

On 01/06/2011 at 7:26pm - health - by Dante -

Today, I had a show with my drama group. My mom isn't a good drunk, she decided to scream along to every song and pass out halfway through. She was in the front row. FML

#14484752
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25021) - you deserved it (2277)

On 01/06/2011 at 11:46am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Aberdeen City)

Today, I had a plaster cast removed from my arm. After telling the nurse it felt like the saw was cutting my skin, she tells me there is no way that it could touch my skin and that I was being paranoid. She cracked open the cast. Burns, blisters and bleeding skin were revealed. FML

#14484091
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41834) - you deserved it (2426)

On 01/06/2011 at 9:54am - health - by omfgitburns (man) -

Today, I had a panic attack at 2am because someone decided to throw a snowball at my window. FML

#14482649
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20295) - you deserved it (6138)

On 01/06/2011 at 3:58am - health - by nuerrotticc -

Today, I was at the doctor's getting some skin scraped off the bottom of my foot for some tests. As soon as the doctor grabbed my foot, it tickled and I accidentally kicked him in the face. During this, the blade sliced my foot open. FML

#14482213
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26454) - you deserved it (9257)

On 01/06/2011 at 2:35am - health - by Anonymous -

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on. My boyfriend noticed that every time I'm about to climax, I hit my head on something. Whether it's a wall or his face. FML

#14481940
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23758) - you deserved it (5502)

On 01/06/2011 at 1:03am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was on a walk when I ran into the woman whose kids I babysit. We had a quick chat, and I noticed she had just blown her driveway clean. As I left, I said "You did a nice blow job!" FML

#14481844
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23499) - you deserved it (12714)

On 01/06/2011 at 12:57am - intimacy - by babysitter (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. He's been calling his penis "fun-sized" for a while now, but I didn't know he meant it really was the size of a fun-size candy bar. I'm pretty sure I'm still technically a virgin. FML

#14475422
309 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49085) - you deserved it (8433)

On 01/05/2011 at 3:49pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, at work, my computer started acting up. I told my boss I could fix it, but he told me to call the IT department instead. Neither the IT technician or his supervisor could figure it out, so I showed them what was wrong and how to fix it. I was promptly fired for wasting 2 hours of company time. FML

#14475268
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35020) - you deserved it (3611)

On 01/05/2011 at 3:25pm - work - by worksux (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was talking to a really cute guy. He leaned closer and I thought he was going to kiss me. Instead, he leaned back, laughed and said, "Wow. You're growing a mustache." FML

#14469051
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29018) - you deserved it (6961)

On 01/04/2011 at 11:17pm - love - by anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, it was opening night for the play where I was, for the first time ever, one of the leads. I went on stage with a loud and energetic entrance. I came in two scenes early. FML

#14468099
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10993) - you deserved it (28990)

On 01/04/2011 at 10:15pm - misc - by theatreluver (woman) - United States

Today, I was out running. All of a sudden I saw a dog come towards me, I thought it was going to attack me and I screamed like a girl in front of everyone. It was a puppy wanting to play. FML

#14467697
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8062) - you deserved it (27536)

On 01/04/2011 at 9:44pm - animals - by BIZZMAL - United States

Today, I hit a parked car which was sticking out in the road and practically unavoidable. I left a note on the windshield saying, "You deserved to get hit - you park like an asshole." Later I realized that the paper I tore to write on was the back of my bank statement, name and address included. FML

#14463588
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7792) - you deserved it (70865)

On 01/04/2011 at 3:28pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I took my daughter to the library instead of the pool. I sat her on the counter and, while I reached for my library card, she turned to the librarian and said "We didn't go to the pool today because Mum has hairy legs." FML

#14459549
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24291) - you deserved it (11923)

On 01/04/2011 at 3:05am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)



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