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ILikeSloths

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ILikeSloths

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 21 January 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 736
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About ILikeSloths : I like sloths. A lot.

ILikeSloths's page activity

Visits<b>Beeftinkle</b> - the 01/18/2013 at 8:24am

ILikeSloths's FML badges

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ILikeSloths's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my girlfriend that I would still care for her if she was a vegetable. She informed me that if I was a potato, she would cut me into chips. And fry me. FML

#19459433
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20362) - you deserved it (6403)

On 04/13/2012 at 12:46am - love - by jesifairy - Australia

Today, my girlfriend and I agreed to tell her parents that she's pregnant. When they started freaking out, instead of dealing with the situation maturely, she went into straight-up Tard Mode and said, "It's okay, I'm not the mom." FML

#19264126
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28073) - you deserved it (5918)

On 03/12/2012 at 12:27pm - love - by yamsterr (man) - United States

Today, while making my daily offering of turd to the porcelain throne, I took out my phone and started playing a game. I suddenly felt a tickling sensation on my leg, and I freaked out as I saw hundreds of ants had emerged from behind the toilet. FML

#19215354
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29372) - you deserved it (3868)

On 03/04/2012 at 5:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, an African-American family came into the restaurant at which I work. They said, "Jackson, party of 5." After I laughed, I realized they were serious. FML

#19166851
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17184) - you deserved it (29507)

On 02/26/2012 at 10:31am - work - by Miss_Kristen - United States (Missouri)

Today, I found out why you shouldn't drop instant mashed potatoes in a fish tank, especially when you have expensive fish. FML

#19138431
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6693) - you deserved it (39265)

On 02/22/2012 at 11:47am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML

#19072659
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34606) - you deserved it (2629)

On 02/14/2012 at 9:29am - love - by Illinoisgirl - Hungary (Budapest)

Today, while waiting outside a liquor store for my boyfriend, a drunk guy leaned over my shoulder, took a large bite out of my burger, and walked away. FML

#18913819
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27221) - you deserved it (3794)

On 01/26/2012 at 2:34am - misc - by RequilaRainbow - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was texting a guy that one of my friends told me about. She gave me his number and told me about how he was deaf. Three hours into great conversation I forgot and asked him what his favorite music was. FML

#18875593
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24578) - you deserved it (10246)

On 01/21/2012 at 11:17pm - love - by Scumbagmemory (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I caught my mother attempting to write a $1400 cheque. To whom? The proprietor of a "Christian charity fund" with whom she had been having Internet conversations. The proprietor's name, and that on the cheque, was "Herp McDerpington". FML

#18540980
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30997) - you deserved it (2406)

On 12/18/2011 at 12:18am - misc - by scammed - Canada (Quebec)

Today, it was my first day on duty as a rookie cop. Everything was going great, and even the veterans on the force were warming up to me. That is until my mother came into the station carrying a brown bag for my lunch. Written on the bag was, "Lunch for my big boy. I love you, pumpkin." FML

#18072512
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36150) - you deserved it (5662)

On 10/25/2011 at 2:46pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while at my job as a hostess, I was seating a couple and their adorable little girl. I tried to ask how old she was, but what came out was, "Aww, what breed is she?" FML

#18039986
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17326) - you deserved it (31332)

On 10/21/2011 at 5:27pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went out on my back patio at night to skinny dip. I live on the intracoastal, and as I was walking towards my pool, the police were doing a random search. From a boat with a spotlight. At least their whistles told me they liked the birthday suit I had on. FML

#17749646
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19879) - you deserved it (8405)

On 09/15/2011 at 3:42am - misc - by Japaroni - United States

Today, I woke up to the feeling of someone tickling my back. I quickly realized I haven't been touched in so long that I was smiling to flies landing on me in my sleep. FML

#17730120
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23715) - you deserved it (4071)

On 09/12/2011 at 7:03pm - animals - by GnarCarBar - United States

Today, I was walking down the street when a police officer started walking behind me with his dog. I sped up and tried to cross the road. He took this as suspicious and got the dog to take me to the floor. I've been afraid of dogs since I was 5. FML

#17702644
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33047) - you deserved it (4150)

On 09/09/2011 at 5:59am - animals - by D (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I was preparing food in the microwave. I hadn't noticed that a fly had flown in until I noticed its melted corpse engraved into my hot-pocket. FML

#17429478
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29306) - you deserved it (5395)

On 08/10/2011 at 1:47pm - animals - by Ser17 - United States



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