Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

IKickPuppiesHard

Search for a member

IKickPuppiesHard

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2040
  • Number of comments : 105
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About IKickPuppiesHard : Fuck social norms. I shall say what I want with no regrets. If you do not like that then awesome; thats your opinion but once you attempt to pass your opinion off as fact to me I WILL shut you down. Now have a nice day.

IKickPuppiesHard's page activity

Visits<b>bigbertha22</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 11:51pm<b>VivaLaColdplay</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 1:50pm<b>AllStache</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 12:56pm<b>Miss_Brii</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 12:55pm<b>DeathMetalSlam</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 6:22pm<b>WordAficionada</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 4:06am<b>boomboom838</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 10:49pm<b>xDochx</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 10:52pm<b>MissMiranda93</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 2:41pm<b>skittycat213</b> - the 05/29/2013 at 7:23pm<b>ged</b> - the 03/26/2013 at 1:11pm<b>ShatteredRubiks</b> - the 01/14/2012 at 10:27pm<b>kitties</b> - the 12/24/2011 at 7:14pm<b>artemisrox98</b> - the 12/24/2011 at 4:48pm<b>CloudEnvy</b> - the 12/18/2011 at 3:19pm<b>i_hate_mondays</b> - the 12/18/2011 at 1:24pm<b>UrCapsLockOn</b> - the 12/17/2011 at 4:11pm<b>Mr_Alarm</b> - the 11/19/2011 at 4:03pm

IKickPuppiesHard's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

See all of IKickPuppiesHard's badges

IKickPuppiesHard's favorite FMLs

Today, it was our 5th anniversary, so I decided to play a little joke on my girlfriend. Before I gave her the real present, an engagement ring, I gave her a gift-wrapped rolling pin instead. I ended up in the hospital. FML

#18029483
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26641) - you deserved it (17676)

On 10/20/2011 at 4:26am - love - by Awie (man) - Austria (Wien)

Today, while reading over my sent application email to a job I have been trying to get, I found out my brother had put "Heil Hitler!" as my signature. FML

#17996037
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35381) - you deserved it (4977)

On 10/16/2011 at 3:15am - work - by Unemployed - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was talking with my uncle, when the subject of my abusive mother-in-law came up. He assured me he'd talk to her and straighten things out. Apparently this means posting on her Facebook wall threatening to "pimp-slap a bitch" if she doesn't get her "fat ass out of family business". FML

#17931369
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24719) - you deserved it (3208)

On 10/07/2011 at 10:40pm - misc - by ...... (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I was at my job in the Halloween store. I had to tell someone, "Please stop hitting the Bieber wig with that pimp cane." FML

Today, my professor snapped and told me that I know nothing, that everything I've ever learned is wrong, and that all of my former teachers should be shot. FML

#17804951
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27168) - you deserved it (4486)

On 09/22/2011 at 2:36pm - misc - by failure (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was jogging in the neighborhood. My new neighbor who lives three houses down clotheslines me and shouts, "You're the reason my wife won't have sex with me!" He then kicked me in the stomach and walked inside. Now I'm scared to leave my house. FML

#17742540
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33151) - you deserved it (3214)

On 09/14/2011 at 4:34am - intimacy - by jumpedjogger - United States (Georgia)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I have a "drinking problem". She says I don't drink enough. FML

#17566686
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31782) - you deserved it (5198)

On 08/24/2011 at 7:34am - love - by fmlTGOD - United States

Today, I work by myself at a retail store and I was bored so I called my boyfriend. I woke him up and he was feeling frisky, and as things were getting heated I started to moan and say dirty things. Until the entire rack of clothes fell over and revealed my boss hiding. He had a boner. FML

#17557500
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18763) - you deserved it (50930)

On 08/23/2011 at 12:18pm - intimacy - by MissCan'tKeepAJob - United States (Texas)

Today, I told my mom I wanted to try out for the track team. Her exact words were "good luck, fatty". FML

#17425463
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31372) - you deserved it (6044)

On 08/10/2011 at 1:48am - misc - by thatfatkid - United States (Iowa)

Today, yep, pubic hair is still flammable. FML

#17253046
364 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12301) - you deserved it (56450)

On 07/25/2011 at 11:12am - health - by Smokey9 - United States (Florida)

Today, I was walking to the store when I ran into one of my friends. He said he heard about my bike being stolen the day before, and that whoever took it was a heartless dick. I hadn't told anyone about the theft. FML

#17231826
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40734) - you deserved it (2777)

On 07/23/2011 at 5:27pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, my house got robbed. They left a note: "Next time, we steal your souls." FML

#17156963
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37212) - you deserved it (3283)

On 07/18/2011 at 12:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML

#17088739
429 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73477) - you deserved it (7666)

On 07/13/2011 at 1:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML

#17088739
429 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73477) - you deserved it (7666)

On 07/13/2011 at 1:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom tried to sell me a bag of rice, with "Cocaine" written on the side of it in sharpie pen. In exchange for my soul. FML

#16993109
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33629) - you deserved it (3604)

On 07/05/2011 at 10:54pm - misc - by Username - United States



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: