Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

IKickPuppiesHard

Offline (yesterday at 5:57am) | Search for a member

IKickPuppiesHard

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3010
  • Number of comments : 142
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About IKickPuppiesHard : Good day fellow fmlers. Just call me Puppy Kicker!

IKickPuppiesHard's page activity

Visits<b>pimpdaddysnuggs</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 8:34pm<b>LexiDaBae</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 7:01am<b>salad354</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 8:32pm<b>PrincessRachael</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 3:47pm<b>claudia19801811</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 6:17am<b>SingingWolf</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 12:02pm<b>potatoking49</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 8:46am<b>coltonte3</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 5:29pm<b>imbackwiththeshi</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 11:54pm<b>dzhonatan</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 10:25am<b>KJxFTW</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 10:01am<b>dont_doubt_me</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 7:24am<b>omgbrainZ</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 11:12am<b>kittyfrozen</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 9:43pm<b>SystemofaBlink41</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 5:58pm<b>katydid91</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 2:30pm<b>Ashafarah</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 4:42pm<b>lifelikedat</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 10:22pm

IKickPuppiesHard's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of IKickPuppiesHard's badges

IKickPuppiesHard's favorite FMLs

Today, I made plans with an old friend that I haven't seen in years. We agreed to meet at a diner and I told him I'd be standing outside. I watched him pull up, look right at me, then do something with his phone. Seconds later, I got a text saying "Sorry, but I'm busy today and can't make it." FML

#15130627
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32924) - you deserved it (3129)

On 02/26/2011 at 8:56pm - misc - by Angela (woman) - United States

Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? I dare you." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML

#14965591
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13284) - you deserved it (47404)

On 02/13/2011 at 10:25pm - misc - by NotAsToughAsHeThinks (man) - United States (Montana)

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. Groggy and disoriented, I bumped into several pieces of furniture and made a lot of noise. My dad woke up, mistook me for a burglar, and knocked me out with his fist. FML

#14944090
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30068) - you deserved it (4238)

On 02/12/2011 at 12:48am - misc - by anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I learned that standing next to a hobo doesn't make me look better in comparison, but instead just makes me seem like a hobo as well. FML

#14862794
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9078) - you deserved it (26809)

On 02/06/2011 at 2:37am - money - by 7rafe7 (man) - United States

Today, in the middle of the night, my fiancé started yelling gibberish in his sleep. When I tried to wake him, he punched me square in the face. FML

#14842863
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25183) - you deserved it (6382)

On 02/04/2011 at 7:05pm - misc - by nosleep (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. She's a sock puppet. FML

#14802825
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18683) - you deserved it (64866)

On 02/01/2011 at 9:32pm - intimacy - by seepeezy32 -

Today, in dance class, the instructor asked me to demonstrate the splits to the group. I slid down, my legs opening wider as I descended. I then loudly farted for the full 5 seconds it took to reach the ground. FML

#14613104
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33086) - you deserved it (5668) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 11:44am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - Switzerland - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, in dance class, the instructor asked me to demonstrate the splits to the group. I slid down, my legs opening wider as I descended. I then loudly farted for the full 5 seconds it took to reach the ground. FML

#14613104
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33086) - you deserved it (5668) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 11:44am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - Switzerland - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I told my husband I want to lose the baby weight I put on with my recent pregnancy, and once I succeed I will go on a clothes shopping spree. To this he remarked, "So either way I'm spending money; either on food or on clothes." FML

#14550598
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21218) - you deserved it (9666)

On 01/12/2011 at 3:23am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my baby-crazy mother expressed her concerns that I haven't conceived after a whole two months of marriage. Her advice amounted to "get divorced while you're still hot, sleep around until you get pregnant, then marry the winner." When I complained to my father, he supported her. FML

#14545580
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32893) - you deserved it (2723)

On 01/11/2011 at 1:46pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a month after my 21st birthday, I received my health exam results. I don't remember the night of the birthday because I was hammered. However, I called my friend and it's now clear that the stripper they paid to have her way with me, had Chlamydia. FML

#14545291
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14482) - you deserved it (30899)

On 01/11/2011 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had to explain to my friend why it's inappropriate to conduct a phone conversation while simultaneously eating a bagel, listening to music, and taking a shit. FML

#14521055
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21898) - you deserved it (3464)

On 01/09/2011 at 1:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, my mom duly informed me I'm the reason people have middle fingers. FML

#14413679
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25495) - you deserved it (5737)

On 12/31/2010 at 8:16pm - misc - by edulover (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend asked me to 'spice things up in the bedroom'. When I asked how, he said I could try wearing a paper bag over my head. FML

#14393948
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35197) - you deserved it (5517)

On 12/30/2010 at 9:09am - intimacy - by georgiahick -

Today, my brother asked if he could borrow my razor, since he recently hit puberty and wanted to have a shave. I decided to be nice and let him. When he returned it half an hour later, I couldn't help but notice his facial hair was untouched. FML

#14329924
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35779) - you deserved it (7377)

On 12/25/2010 at 12:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: