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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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IEatCrayons

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IEatCrayons
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2769
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About IEatCrayons : 15.
vietnamese and white.
love to laugh.
hate bananas.
do not like the sun.

IEatCrayons's last visitors

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IEatCrayons's favorite FMLs

Today, I got back from a romantic vacation at a fancy hotel with my boyfriend of 6 months. After a steamy love session, I confessed that I was in love with him. Later, when I got out of the shower, all his stuff was gone and I was stuck with the entire week's hotel cost and no ride home. FML

#3824870 (205)

I agree, your life sucks (47775) - you deserved it (4210)

On 07/17/2009 at 3:58am - love - by Stranded (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found a website that lets you write an email to yourself from "the past". I used my boss's address, and wrote a long email about how much I hate him, signed from me. It worked, and he'll receive it in 6 months, after I move away. He's already received the confirmation email, though. FML

I agree, your life sucks (6032) - you deserved it (37201)

On 07/15/2009 at 4:17pm - work - by Alex - United States (Virginia)

Today, I finally cracked the password on my husband's email account. I don't know which is worse: finding out your husband is cheating on you with several people, or finding his password includes his ex-girlfriend's name. FML

#3305940 (328)

I agree, your life sucks (46689) - you deserved it (15983)

On 06/28/2009 at 1:42pm - love - by resipsahipsta (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to find a date for this banquet we did in my town every year. I paid my neighbor 40 bucks an hour to be my date. It was a 4 hour event. Best part: she got drunk and told the whole town I was paying her. FML

#2720571 (132)

I agree, your life sucks (12280) - you deserved it (40355)

On 06/08/2009 at 2:44pm - love - by twowords (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my cousin and I found out that when a girl puts a flower in the right side of her hair, it means she's available. The bigger the flower, the more available she is. My eleven year old boy cousin told me to "cut down a palm tree and put it in my hair". FML

#2671287 (186)

I agree, your life sucks (51219) - you deserved it (4534)

On 06/06/2009 at 8:38pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, it was beautiful out. I decided to play guitar at the park near my house. I left my guitar case open, asking not for money but for feedback. I got two pieces of paper with feedback: 1) You're fat. 2) Get a life. FML

#2429175 (109)

I agree, your life sucks (34724) - you deserved it (8909)

On 05/30/2009 at 10:46am - misc - by peopleinthepark (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I bought a top with some other things. I went to the restroom and had diarrhea, but there was no toilet paper in the stall. I had to use the receipt from the store. I then realized the clerk hadn't put the top in the bag. I needed that receipt to get the top. FML

#2396046 (139)

I agree, your life sucks (37341) - you deserved it (9285)

On 05/29/2009 at 1:44am - misc - by suckerrrrr (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was getting ready for my first date with a boy I really like when my dad insisted on meeting him. My dad is super protective and a cop. He cleaned his gun in front of my date and made it clear he had to be careful with me. My date started to cry when we got to the car. FML

#2376689 (390)

I agree, your life sucks (54097) - you deserved it (3905)

On 05/28/2009 at 4:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I was on webcam with someone and the conversation died so I said "brb". I sat there for five minutes not realising I had left my webcam on. FML

#2334865 (126)

I agree, your life sucks (5714) - you deserved it (53768)

On 05/27/2009 at 3:11am - misc - by Arrgh (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I decided to give my virginity to my boyfriend of four months, because I told him I loved him. Two minutes after he'd pulled out, he grabs his cell and mass texts "I FINALLY GOT LAID!". FML

#2187594 (303)

I agree, your life sucks (56434) - you deserved it (17845)

On 05/22/2009 at 6:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I asked my best friend why she didn't ask our other best friend Anna to be a bridesmaid in her wedding. She said, "She's too pretty. I need ugly bridesmaids to make me look better." I am the maid of honor. FML

#2187535 (115)

I agree, your life sucks (47179) - you deserved it (2248)

On 05/22/2009 at 6:21pm - misc - by Neverthebride - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I went to the casino. I used my last $5 on a slot machine. When the machine started lighting up, saying I had just won $20,000, I excitedly began jumping and screaming. As people crowded around me, the casino lady explained it was 20,000 credits, not dollars. I had only won $20. FML

#2187071 (153)

I agree, your life sucks (31446) - you deserved it (12147)

On 05/22/2009 at 6:12pm - money - by uneek14 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to my girlfriend's Catholic all girls high school to ask her to prom by decorating her car. As soon as I walked on campus the school went into lock down because of a "suspicious male intruder." When I saw my girlfriend, she denied knowing me. I was arrested. FML

#2109937 (226)

I agree, your life sucks (57362) - you deserved it (4384)

On 05/20/2009 at 11:11am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was on the bus home and on the phone with my best friend discussing my sex life with this new guy I'm seeing. I was telling her all sorts of raunchy sex things we've done until someone taps my shoulder and says "I'm sure he doesn't appreciate you saying this in public." It was his mom. FML

#2093858 (221)

I agree, your life sucks (21994) - you deserved it (71262)

On 05/19/2009 at 8:51pm - intimacy - by Kens (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I walked into the office of my new orthodontist. As I went up to the receptionist to inform her that I was there, she immediately puts down the phone and kindly starts to explain that this is an orthodontists office, and not a dermatologist. I never thought my skin was that bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks (41257) - you deserved it (1840)

On 05/19/2009 at 7:16pm - health - by himym_love (woman) - United States (New Jersey)