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Humperdick

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Humperdick

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 18 September 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1116
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Humperdick : I'm a girl.

Humperdick's page activity

Visits<b>Sriehl</b> - the 10/29/2013 at 10:44am

Humperdick's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

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Humperdick's favorite FMLs

Today, my father decided that since he's paying for my flat, he will use it twice a week to have it off with his girlfriend while I'm away. My parents are still together. FML

#6081535
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23886) - you deserved it (2298)

On 10/31/2009 at 8:54am - intimacy - by franzbiel (man) - Switzerland (Luzern)

Today, I found out why my husband had wanted to wait until marriage to get it on. Last night was the first night of our honeymoon, and he informed me that he wasn't always Ben, but used to be Brenda. His 'penis' doesn't work and he had wanted to know I "truly loved him" before he had let me know. FML

#5148313
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (190801) - you deserved it (20282)

On 09/09/2009 at 1:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my husband and I were in bed, and just as I was about to finish he screamed, "Oh shit! It's 4:15, my strawberries are gonna whither!!!!" and then jumped off me and went to check on his farm on FarmVille. An imaginary farm, on Facebook. FML

#4679232
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (89103) - you deserved it (7724)

On 08/20/2009 at 10:51am - love - by demk (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my family took me to a wig store saying I wouldn't feel so insecure about being bald because of my chemo treatments. When I told them I accepted myself and didn't want a wig, they came out and told me THEY couldn't accept it. My own family is embarrassed of me over something I can't control. FML

#4177051
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (91944) - you deserved it (3362)

On 07/31/2009 at 5:35am - misc - by Betrayed (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I just found out my dad got remarried a year ago. The woman is officially living with us, I got to have lunch with her alone today. I found out she is only 22, with a 14 year old little brother. My dad's 47. I'm 17, now with a 14 year old uncle and a mom that can pass for my girlfriend. FML

#4126370
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55120) - you deserved it (2832)

On 07/29/2009 at 2:22am - misc - by Beefballs (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was at my job as a flight attendant. A passenger on my plane stopped breathing and turned blue. As I cleared his airways and was busy strapping an oxygen mask to his face, the passenger behind him tried to hand me her trash. Apparently I'm a walking trash can, no matter what I'm doing. FML

#4100528
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64962) - you deserved it (3105)

On 07/28/2009 at 3:29am - work - by skygoddess (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was coaching a little league soccer game. I was telling one of my players to go cover another kid. I said "go cover the little yellow kid!" because he happened to be wearing a yellow shirt. He also happened to be Asian. I then got death stares from his family members. FML

#2009898
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60479) - you deserved it (22462)

On 05/17/2009 at 9:48am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend and I went to a Taylor Swift concert. At the concert they put up a sign that said "Scream if you love country boys." My boyfriend took one look at it and started screaming. FML

#1971558
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55323) - you deserved it (11547)

On 05/16/2009 at 3:52am - love - by TayTay (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, at work, some little girl went in the bathroom for quite a while. Came out for two minutes and went back in. She then came out with her finger clutched in a paper towel. One of the other coworkers went in to check the bathroom. The little girl wrote "Hi!" with her own poop. FML

#1957441
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43875) - you deserved it (2561)

On 05/15/2009 at 3:20am - work - by RunningMurphy (man) - United States (Minnesota)



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