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House101

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House101

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1187
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About House101 : I'm a Little Monster, fiction writer, and aspiring film director. Follow me on Twitter @thedonhudson

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House101's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the drug store to pick up some Monistat for a yeast infection. As I was leaving the store, the security alarm went off. The attractive security guard asked to see my receipt, smiled, told me I looked nice, so I handed him the receipt. His face then abruptly changed to a look of disgust. FML

#3511573
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38763) - you deserved it (3943)

On 07/05/2009 at 8:06pm - health - by yeasty (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I ran into an old student of mine at the grocery store. She didn't recognize me at first so I introduced myself as her old teacher. She looked taken aback for a moment, and then said, "Oh my God... you're still alive?" FML

#3141332
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52729) - you deserved it (3940)

On 06/23/2009 at 7:31am - misc - by feelinblue (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while on the road I saw a turtle in the middle of the other lane. I slammed on my brakes and got out, holding up and pissing off several drivers on both sides of the highway. Getting closer to the turtle, I realized that it was not a turtle at all, but a very large pile of dog shit. FML

#3136598
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17508) - you deserved it (41090)

On 06/23/2009 at 12:44am - animals - by Xtine (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to Target. I was on my way to the bathroom when I find a huge mirror. No one was around so I started to see how my butt looked in my jeans, checked up my nose and fixed my bra. An older woman then walks out of a door next to the mirror and explains that it's a two-way mirror. FML

#1741701
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18099) - you deserved it (42349)

On 05/08/2009 at 1:25am - misc - by cammy123 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, in math class we were learning about gravity. To demonstrate my teacher asked me to stand on the desk and then step off. Upon stepping on the desk it curved inward and cracked. Everyone was dying of laughter. Fuck gravity. FML

#1547759
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67092) - you deserved it (9057)

On 05/02/2009 at 12:55am - misc - by systeminitiated (man) - Canada

Today, I woke up with the worst cold, ever. My nose was running like crazy and my eyes were all puffy. So I stumbled over to the medicine cabinet and took what I thought were three tylenol cold's. Two hours later I'm still sick and I can't leave the bathroom. They were laxatives. FML

#1507278
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39038) - you deserved it (23283)

On 04/30/2009 at 9:40pm - health - by fuckmyliiiiiiife (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was on a crowded subway going home. My trousers were a bit dusty so I tried to dust myself off. As I was slapping the side of my leg I missed and hit a woman behind me in the ass. She called me a pervert and walked off. Everyone stared at me. It takes 40 minutes to get home. FML

#740929
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48074) - you deserved it (11453)

On 04/01/2009 at 2:07am - misc - by Thithien1 (man) - Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML

#503348
867 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58114) - you deserved it (617306)

On 03/21/2009 at 12:46am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I forgot to do my French homework, but since it was an online worksheet, I told my teacher my internet wasn't working. I told her with an e-mail. FML

#161178
995 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69938) - you deserved it (729210)

On 02/28/2009 at 2:07pm - misc - by ihavepinkbackpac (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I wore out the highest heels I had but was nervous about falling because I am such a klutz. I got through the night without any injuries, so I changed into the sneakers I had brought with me to walk home. I tripped right outside my house in my sneakers and broke my ankle. FML

#153309
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50991) - you deserved it (5329)

On 02/27/2009 at 3:23pm - misc - by klutz - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I got stuck in an elevator for 2 hours with my boyfriend and the guy that I have been secretly having an affair with for 6 months. FML

#5470
313 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41905) - you deserved it (340177)

On 02/02/2009 at 2:23pm - love - by Noname (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my little sister and I were reading a book together and out of nowhere, she said "I love you". My heart melted and I told her that I love her too. Then she told me that she was talking to her stuffed animal, not me. FML

#4425
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32002) - you deserved it (2660)

On 01/31/2009 at 11:29pm - kids - by Noname - United States (California)



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