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Hlperez

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Hlperez
  • Town/Country : reading, us
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 16 December 1991 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 2077
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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Hlperez's favorite FMLs

Today, an old lady hit me with her car. After which she says, "Oh! Not Again!" FML

#15150765
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25600) - you deserved it (2196)

On 02/28/2011 at 10:50am - misc - by roadkill - United States

Today, I attended the wrong funeral. I spent twenty minutes trying to hide and walk away without being too conspicuous. FML

#15112271
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21731) - you deserved it (7444)

On 02/25/2011 at 7:18am - misc - by Arlbethere (woman) - United Kingdom (Northumberland)

Today, after some passionate love making with my husband, I accidentally farted on his leg. He shrieked and frantically began shaking his leg while screaming, "Get it off! Get it off!" FML

#15079652
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18716) - you deserved it (30459)

On 02/22/2011 at 4:02pm - intimacy - by CutieBooty (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, after some passionate love making with my husband, I accidentally farted on his leg. He shrieked and frantically began shaking his leg while screaming, "Get it off! Get it off!" FML

#15079652
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18716) - you deserved it (30459)

On 02/22/2011 at 4:02pm - intimacy - by CutieBooty (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I ate at Chipotle. There was a girl sitting alone, so I asked if I could eat lunch with her. She said yes, and as I sat down I tried to open my bag of chips. When trying to do so, my hand slipped, and I punched myself in the face. She laughed, and promptly left. FML

#15021227
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25267) - you deserved it (6857)

On 02/17/2011 at 10:02pm - misc - by justmyluck? -

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. She's a sock puppet. FML

#14802825
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17540) - you deserved it (62195)

On 02/01/2011 at 9:32pm - intimacy - by seepeezy32 -

Today, I tried to email my Dad a picture of someone we knew that I'd found on the Internet. He called me later to inform me that I had actually sent him a picture of myself in a naughty school girl outfit that I'd taken for my husband. My mom was laughing her ass off. FML

#14534299
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10799) - you deserved it (36797)

On 01/10/2011 at 3:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I tried to email my Dad a picture of someone we knew that I'd found on the Internet. He called me later to inform me that I had actually sent him a picture of myself in a naughty school girl outfit that I'd taken for my husband. My mom was laughing her ass off. FML

#14534299
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10799) - you deserved it (36797)

On 01/10/2011 at 3:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was drinking a bottle of water. My friend came up from behind and scared me, causing me to inhale and choke on the water. Lacking air, I passed out. I awoke to him on the ground laughing his ass off. I almost drowned drinking a bottle of water. FML

#14533533
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26142) - you deserved it (3662)

On 01/10/2011 at 2:14pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had to explain to my friend why it's inappropriate to conduct a phone conversation while simultaneously eating a bagel, listening to music, and taking a shit. FML

#14521055
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20795) - you deserved it (3349)

On 01/09/2011 at 1:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, on the way to work, I was punched in the balls by a complete stranger. FML

#14505215
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26425) - you deserved it (3693)

On 01/08/2011 at 2:56am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was told I sound like a seal barking when I orgasm. FML

#14365542
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24339) - you deserved it (6802)

On 12/28/2010 at 2:44am - intimacy - by sealy (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was told I sound like a seal barking when I orgasm. FML

#14365542
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24339) - you deserved it (6802)

On 12/28/2010 at 2:44am - intimacy - by sealy (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was told I sound like a seal barking when I orgasm. FML

#14365542
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24339) - you deserved it (6802)

On 12/28/2010 at 2:44am - intimacy - by sealy (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend and I were in our room getting hot and heavy. As he was entering me, he started making electronic whirring sounds. Once inside, he said in a robotic voice, "Initiating launch sequence in 3... 2... 1..." and began thrusting as fast as possible. FML

#14333152
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35244) - you deserved it (7057)

On 12/25/2010 at 8:38am - intimacy - by Jessie - United States (Texas)



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