This member hasn't filled in the description.
Profile completed
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, I wanted to punish a student for being late. I decided to start a pop quiz before he arrived. I was positive there wasn't enough time for him to finish. He scored full marks and I couldn't say a word. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6415) - you deserved it (60937)
On 08/23/2010 at 12:18am - kids - by K_M (man) - Malaysia (Selangor)
Today, I got woken up by Hallelujah blasting outside my apartment windows for 30 minutes straight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16779) - you deserved it (2579)
On 08/20/2010 at 12:06am - misc - by notyoueallie (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, my husband discovered that whispering anything in my ear will turn me on. He turned to me and whispered 'cheeseburger' in my ear. Unfortunately, I moaned. Now he now laughs about it with our roommate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20371) - you deserved it (13365)
On 08/07/2010 at 9:05pm - intimacy - by Indigo_Kitten (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I got bitch-slapped by a walrus at Sea Life Park. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32941) - you deserved it (9011)
On 07/13/2010 at 12:34am - misc - by Betchsadface - United States
Today, I fell asleep on the couch and must have rolled off. When I woke up, I noticed my braces were stuck to the rug. After frantically pulling, my mom finally sawed me off the rug with scissors. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28246) - you deserved it (2924)
On 07/03/2010 at 12:19am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, while out with my boyfriend I accidentally let out a rather large fart. I was in such shock the only sentence I could make was "I farted." Clearly he was in shock too because the only words he could utter were "I know." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13960) - you deserved it (18593)
On 05/23/2010 at 5:21am - misc - by Oops (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I was buying condoms for my girlfriend and myself. While at the checkout counter, my guy friend sees me, runs to me, puts his arm around me, kisses me on the cheek, then yells "Thank you baby!" There were about twenty people behind me, they all gave me dirty looks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30964) - you deserved it (8785)
On 05/09/2010 at 10:20am - intimacy - by imustbegay - United States
Today, the love of my life sent me a text saying "touch my pork". Somehow I don't think my feelings are mutual. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15219) - you deserved it (3338)
On 03/18/2010 at 6:24am - intimacy - by burgeee - United Kingdom (Bristol)
Today, after years of thinking I was weird for never being attracted to anyone, I realized that for the first time in my life I actually have a crush on someone. That 'someone' is my English teacher. He is 60. I am 18. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22015) - you deserved it (9084)
On 03/16/2010 at 6:27am - misc - by allwrong (woman) - Australia (South Australia)
Today, a wasp flew into my room. While I, a 6'2" hockey player, cowered in the corner, my 4'11" girlfriend killed it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6528) - you deserved it (26960)
On 03/02/2010 at 10:53am - animals - by Jeff - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I discovered that my abusive, obsessive, psychotic ex-boyfriend from over two years ago still has a thing for me. How did I find out? Although I've ignored him walking unnecessarily past my house for the past two months, it was hard to ignore when he fell from a tree outside my window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27657) - you deserved it (1769)
On 02/27/2010 at 11:30pm - love - by sacrophage (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was sitting down in a store when a stroller stopped by me. While the parents were fixing the strap, the baby looked at me, gasped, looked at me again, gasped, and then screamed. Ten minutes later, another baby looked at me and screamed. My face scares babies. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23281) - you deserved it (2707)
On 02/20/2010 at 7:03pm - kids - by Scaryman (man) - United States (Maryland)
Today, my dog farted next to my CPAP sleep/breathing machine. The machine sucked up her fart, compressed it, and promptly injected it up both of my nostrils. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30140) - you deserved it (2506)
On 02/13/2010 at 11:08am - animals - by Dog fart - United States
Today, when setting up for a rehearsal, my eldest teacher was standing next to me. My music teacher announces that it will be a tight fit and hard for everyone to fit in the area. The old teacher next to me leans over and whispers, "I'd like to fit in your tight area." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21331) - you deserved it (1660)
On 02/12/2010 at 12:13am - intimacy - by pinky (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, a white guy tried to teach me to use chopsticks properly. I'm Chinese and have been using them since I could eat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24245) - you deserved it (3831)
On 02/10/2010 at 12:11am - love - by black_commet08 - Sent from mobile version
Monday 17 June 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
