About Hiphuray4peas : FML is my daily guilty pleasure!
Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Today, I spent hours debating with a lady who claimed she'd spent years "studying the big bang theory". Not only did she not know the scientific meaning of the word "theory", her killer argument was "If the big bang happened, where are the fossils?" I'm not sure whether or not I just got trolled. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27523) - you deserved it (3723)
On 05/18/2013 at 2:44pm - misc - by look at the fucking universe, lady (man) - United States (Alabama)
Today, my boyfriend yelled at me. Apparently I'm not the "classy girl" he thought I was, and he's not comfortable "doing such vile things in public." I had tried to hold his hand. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41617) - you deserved it (3151)
On 05/15/2013 at 2:43am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, at work, I was trying to get the octopus out of its tank to transfer it to another one. It instantly latched to my face and sprayed ink all over me. My boss told me to stop playing with the animals. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42850) - you deserved it (4486)
On 05/10/2013 at 8:37am - animals - by FenRackety (man) - Canada
Today, while he was eating chicken, one of my friends asked me why I'm a vegetarian. I responded that I believe in animal rights and don't like the conditions the animals are forced to live in. He looked at me incredulously before explaining that "chickens aren't animals, they're birds." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34649) - you deserved it (7340)
On 04/26/2013 at 9:23am - animals - by revan546 - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, I was excited for my first date in a while, with a "tall handsome business man." Turns out he "doesn't feel emotions anymore", likes getting peed on, and "doesn't do condoms." Thanks, internet dating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42298) - you deserved it (10111)
On 04/25/2013 at 11:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I finally hooked up with the guy that I have been in love with forever. If there is such a thing as soul mates, this guy is it. He's my best friend in the whole world. It was the worst sex I have ever had. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49051) - you deserved it (9448)
On 04/25/2013 at 1:33am - intimacy - by Live Sweet -
Today, my boyfriend and I attempted sexting for the first time. After about twenty minutes of Star Wars references, I gave up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37263) - you deserved it (7304)
On 04/19/2013 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my virginal girlfriend of a year graduated from veterinary school. She can shove her arm shoulder-deep up a cow's ass without blinking, but still feels too insecure to even touch my penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54435) - you deserved it (14221)
Today, I went for a run, and my own dog attacked me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31998) - you deserved it (4440)
On 04/11/2013 at 8:59pm - animals - by anyonmus - United States (Maryland)
Today, I realized that my Twitter profile was very public when my business professor made fun of student tweets in class. My tweet went, "Totally bullshitting this business report" about the report I had just handed in, worth a large portion of my grade. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11000) - you deserved it (40172)
On 04/11/2013 at 3:49am - work - by imscrewed - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and I told him I was close to having an orgasm. He smirked and started talking like Yoda, saying, "Strong with the cum, this one is". Orgasm gone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38131) - you deserved it (5532)
On 04/10/2013 at 12:32pm - intimacy - by iwassoclose - United States
Today, my girlfriend was giving me head during the horror flick we were watching. Little did I know, my girlfriend isn't a big fan of horror films. It was during a sex scene that intensified the moment. The same sex scene from which emerged a sudden jump-scare. I now have bite marks on my penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19346) - you deserved it (35508)
On 03/17/2013 at 5:07am - intimacy - by Cliché... or Touché? -
Today, my boyfriend still won't talk to me, after I caused him the "worst embarrassment" of his life in front of his friends. What did I do wrong? I joined their conversation and ended up confusing the fictional characters of Gollum and Yoda with one another. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13254) - you deserved it (44619) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 03/15/2013 at 8:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Centre)
Today, instead of actually teaching us something, our college professor excitedly showed us the godawful Harlem Shake video he made with his friends. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25467) - you deserved it (3106)
On 03/06/2013 at 6:51am - work - by Will this stupid fad ever end? (man) - United States
Today, my car got rear ended by a driver with an "I brake for squirrels" bumper sticker. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19549) - you deserved it (1356)
On 03/05/2013 at 6:00pm - misc - by MoonBunny - United States (Florida)
Monday 20 May 2013
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