Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About Hiimhaileypotter : Hi I'm Hailey Potter ;) I love animals, books, music, writing, yoga, and hiking. ISFJ personality. English is my thing, I love spelling and grammar. I have a Quarter horse that I trail ride, his name is a Lord of the Rings reference. If you can guess it, you'll get a virtual high five, yay!
I don't tell strangers over the internet where I live. It's nothing personal so I can't stand when people ask where I live, then throw a hissy fit and block me when I won't tell them. If you want to talk or ask questions then do so, but don't be whiny. Thanks. :)
"Let them see that their words can cut you, and you'll never be free of the mockery. If they want to give you a name, take it, make it your own. Then they can't hurt you with it anymore." -Tyrion Lannister
You’ve watched 5 FML videos on the website, and commented on them.
Picture this FML
You have left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
Today, my wife's pregnancy hormones got so bad that she freaked out and threw a tantrum, accusing me of always making important decisions for her. All I did was get her some food from Taco Bell as a surprise. FML
Today, I got kicked out of English class shortly after our teacher told us we have to write an essay on how the storyline of Harry Potter is one big allegory for "the futility of socialism." Apparently, reacting with disbelief makes me a "disruptive influence." FML
Today, my ex-wife put my number on Craigslist as a gay fashion designer needing a one night stand. I only found out when I got a text from an unknown number asking me when was the last time I "ate a black anaconda". FML
Today, being the prank couple that we are, I decided to mess with my husband. When he got off work, I said, "The lady from your office called and said she was pregnant. From you." He immediately broke down crying, and said, "I knew it." Turns out, my fetus already has a sibling. FML
Today, I woke up, thinking it was going to be a good day. However, when I looked at my phone, I saw that my girlfriend had sent me an obscene number of angry messages, which are still coming in, because I forgot to say goodnight to her last night. FML
Today, my sister had an emotional breakdown because two guys love her and she can't pick just one. Meanwhile I'm single and spend my time laying treats on my floor in a pattern and watching my rabbit run in circles. FML
Today, I went downstairs a little after midnight to grab a snack, and in the dark hallway, I clearly saw a small child walk into the kitchen. I was freaked out, but I followed him in. There was nobody in the room. I'm now too scared to sleep, and am seriously considering moving house. FML
Today, my mom came into my room to give me a goodbye kiss. Due to the routine of my girlfriend doing the exact same thing in the exact same spot, I held the kiss way longer than what a mother/son kiss should last. My mom actually had to tell me to "let go". FML
Friday 17 April 2015