About Hiimhaileypotter : I have lots of pets including things that most people don't consider pets, such as chickens and rats. I'm a country girl from the USA but I'm a major nerd and love stuff such as the Elder Scrolls games (been playing since I was 8), Harry Potter (began reading the books by myself when I was in 2nd grade), Iron Man, Thor & the other Avengers, and Lord of the Rings. Wanna talk? Just message me.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
Today, I was walking to school with my earphones in, when someone tapped me on the shoulder. I was shocked, and whirled around to hit him in the crotch. I soon realized he was just trying to return the commuter pass I'd dropped at the station. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3994) - you deserved it (18815)
On 09/15/2012 at 2:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, my five-year-old daughter asked me why moms don't swallow clothes, so that their babies won't be born naked. My husband burst into derisive laughter, and has now trained her into responding to the name "Derp-Derp." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17342) - you deserved it (1853)
On 09/14/2012 at 7:06pm - kids - by -___- (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)
Today, it's my girlfriend's birthday. To celebrate, I spent the day with her and then took her out to a really nice dinner. She is currently giving me the silent treatment because I didn't write "happy birthday" on her Facebook wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28724) - you deserved it (421)
On 08/08/2012 at 1:15pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, while doing my job as a cart clerk, a gentleman went around the parking lot and picked some trash up, trying to help out. Faith in humanity: +1. About an hour later I saw a woman pick a bug off of her windshield and eat it. Faith in humanity: -200. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16672) - you deserved it (1453)
On 08/08/2012 at 7:23am - work - by TJ (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I came out to my parents. I don't really fit any stereotype, I'm just an average guy who happens to be into guys. Ten minutes later, I overheard my mother say to my step-dad, "Should we redecorate his room pink?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (21374) - you deserved it (4928)
On 08/07/2012 at 8:11pm - misc - by ohai95 (man) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)
Today, I decided to be nice and pay a social visit to my slightly deranged grandpa. I ended up politely sitting through two hours of him lecturing me on how he "invented the modern tap", then on how sex is an Illuminati invention to "give sluts the STDs they need to kill us all". FML
I agree, your life sucks (12091) - you deserved it (1084)
On 08/03/2012 at 7:50pm - misc - by yeah okay then (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)
Today, I woke up to find my cat has gone into heat. Her favorite thing to do right now is sticking her ass in my face and howling like a Nazgûl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13969) - you deserved it (2879)
On 07/30/2012 at 2:05pm - animals - by soph511 (woman) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)
Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house party. To avoid a huge scene, I pulled her into another room, during which I managed to trip over my feet and faceplant the floor. She shouted, "Hah! That's what you get!" Now everyone thinks she beat the shit out of me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15716) - you deserved it (3482)
On 07/24/2012 at 4:08pm - health - by *facefloor* (man) - United States
Today, an old guy approached me and asked if I had ever seen an elephant with white ears. I shook my head. He then pulled the pockets out of his shorts and whipped out his sex nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25675) - you deserved it (2936)
On 07/12/2012 at 2:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I stumbled across my ex's blog. Apparently, while dating me, he realized he was gay. Good to know the one guy I've dated, lost my virginity to, and fell in love with, was never truly attracted to me and was dating me just to be sure. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23325) - you deserved it (1708)
On 06/28/2012 at 11:28am - love - by FMlovelife (woman) - United States
Today, while I was waiting at a red light, another car slammed into me. By the time I got out to assess the damage, the other car was empty and there was nobody in sight. Either Moby Dickwad was abducted by aliens mid-crash, or he was behind on his insurance payments. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17300) - you deserved it (1074)
On 06/24/2012 at 4:51pm - misc - by Boar - United States (New Mexico)
Today, I'm driving cross-country with my parents. As if the stifling heat isn't bad enough, they keep stopping to admire, comment on, and practically do a photoshoot in every corn field we pass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16065) - you deserved it (1757)
On 06/16/2012 at 4:36pm - misc - by gabby - United States
Today, I drove my drunk sister home after a wild night of partying. She did not go to bed as I expected; instead, she laid in the bathtub and cried every time I left her. Now it's 3AM, and she's using her bra as a lasso for various objects in the room. The best part is I work in 4 hours. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19110) - you deserved it (1840)
On 06/10/2012 at 3:54am - misc - by eddie818 - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, my English teacher kicked me out of class for being "rude and disruptive." In actuality, I had called her out for having blatantly used Google Translate for several example sentences, all of which sounded as if a semi-literate foreigner had constructed them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14731) - you deserved it (2384)
On 06/08/2012 at 3:45pm - misc - by hackshack (man) - Brazil (Rio Grande do Sul)
Today, I was having a debate with my friend, who actually believes karma is real. He got very angry with me and stormed off, tripping over his own feet in the process. I laughed and asked what he'd done in a past life to deserve that one. He responded by getting up and punching me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6908) - you deserved it (23508)
On 06/07/2012 at 5:26pm - health - by sh3n-D (man) - Denmark (Midtjylland)
Friday 24 May 2013
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