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Hieroglyph

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Hieroglyph

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 20 September 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2019
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Hieroglyph's page activity

Visits<b>Leigghhh</b> - yesterday at 11:01am<b>Xion0014</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 10:46pm<b>SuperNavi64</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 4:56pm<b>Arathis</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 11:42pm<b>karcummings</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 9:49pm<b>IvyChennyChen</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 4:35pm<b>eski2015</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 12:57am<b>bloodlusthatter</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 7:57pm<b>KayDee29</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 2:49am<b>vsus98</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 11:42pm<b>LilyLi</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 7:45pm<b>Mar2171</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 4:48pm<b>echarlotte</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 6:43pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 7:06pm<b>skye147</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 6:47pm<b>FutBol_Fan_30</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 1:48am<b>Nahpets</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 6:42pm<b>joejoe1415</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 7:21pm

Fucked!<b>Arathis</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 5:51am<b>bloodlusthatter</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 1:57am

Hieroglyph's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Hieroglyph's badges

Hieroglyph's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I said I wouldn't find her attractive in 20 years. What I actually said was that I wouldn't sleep with her mother now, who happens to be 20 years older than her. FML

#21460448
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22401) - you deserved it (2707)

On 08/25/2015 at 7:55am - love - by Shelling Ford - Germany (Bayern)

Today, I woke up early for work. Had my coffee, finished up a report and headed out of my house. Not only was the office closed today, but the silent alarm was on, which is triggered by a door opening even if you use a key. I was startled by the cops searching the building, ran, and got tazed. FML

#21459236
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19904) - you deserved it (5782)

On 08/22/2015 at 8:21am - work - by BryanTazed - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boss bitched me out for violating workplace privacy, after he found an FML post from last year that eerily resembled a situation that happened the same year. He thought I posted it and twisted things to make him look like an idiot. I've never posted here in my life. FML

#21458477
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25149) - you deserved it (2317)

On 08/20/2015 at 1:48pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Fife)

Today, I told my daughter that we're going to the beach. Today, my daughter also tried to dig up our deceased dog that we buried in our back yard last week so it can come along. FML

#21458250
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22051) - you deserved it (1534)

On 08/19/2015 at 10:38pm - kids - by GlueAndCarrots - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend of five years broke up with me, saying I've changed and she can't be with someone who's so emotional all the time. Well I'm so sorry that after two weeks, I'm not quite over my brother's death yet. FML

#21457397
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36344) - you deserved it (1557)

On 08/18/2015 at 12:09am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my vehicle's transmission shifter moves freely without shifting gears. I'm stuck in park, in a parking lot, unable to even put it into neutral to push the vehicle out of the way of several parked cars. The old lady screaming at me just outside my door doesn't understand logic either. FML

Today, I approached a hot female security guard and attempted to compliment her new tattoos. Instead of saying, "Nice tats", I ended up saying, "Nice tits". My HR meeting is tomorrow morning. FML

#21455888
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21963) - you deserved it (8711)

On 08/14/2015 at 5:35am - work - by babbling idiot - Canada

Today, my friend and I were getting picked up by his dad after a carnival. As I put my stuff in the back of the car and shut the door to walk around to get in the other side, his dad drove off, thinking I was in the car, leaving me to walk up their hill. It was midnight and I ended up lost. FML

#21455882
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23103) - you deserved it (1959)

On 08/14/2015 at 5:08am - misc - by jonloran - United States (Nevada)

Today, my mom meant to send a picture of her poop to my aunt, but sent it to my swim coach instead. FML

Today, at Subway, the pretty girl serving made me so nervous by that I forgot what cucumbers were called. FML

#21454765
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19568) - you deserved it (3114)

On 08/11/2015 at 12:22pm - misc - by it's awkward - United States (California)

Today, I'm lying awake at 2 in the morning listening to the police helicopter circle my house yet again. I recently moved near quiet woodland to escape the traffic noise that disturbed my sleep. Quiet woodland where apparently the local criminals play midnight hide-and-seek with the police. FML

Today, my girlfriend said she would give my penis a name: Gonzales. I asked why she wanted to name it that, and she said, "Because he's Speedy." FML

#21453197
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21108) - you deserved it (4232)

On 08/07/2015 at 3:47pm - intimacy - by Gonzales (man) - Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant)

Today, I bought some pricey lipstick for a date tonight. An hour after putting it on, my lips are so swollen, I look like a blow-up sex doll. FML

#21453135
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21035) - you deserved it (2873)

On 08/07/2015 at 12:36pm - health - by blow me (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my girlfriend and I were making love. It got hot and intense and we were really into it, until she blurted out, "Oh baby, rub your penis against mine". FML

Today, the girl I've loved for years kissed me. Then she started crying and wiping her mouth, and had a panic attack. I had to help her through it, tell her that it was no big deal, and that it would never happen again. FML



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Friday 28 August 2015

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