About HeyHeyFishFillet : Yea, I'm weird.
HeyHeyFishFillet's FML badges
You sure know how to party?
You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1am. Happy New Year!
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
HeyHeyFishFillet's favorite FMLs
by Links / 11/20/2009 at 2:26am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by bdayloser / 11/07/2009 at 12:24am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, a friend asked me if I'd buy him some condoms because he's too shy to buy them himself. I obliged and whilst queuing at the till to buy them I felt someone tap my shoulder. I turned around to see my fiancée glaring at me. We don't use condoms. FML
by Oops / 10/24/2009 at 9:14am / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Love
Today, my manager mentioned that she'd hired a "cute boy" to help me out at work with paperwork. The "cute boy" was my ex-fiancé and now I have to be with him in an office for 30 some hours a week while his current fiancée brings him lunch everyday. FML
by Alyssa / 10/19/2009 at 3:37pm / United States (Virginia) / Love
Today, we had a lockdown in our school for 2 hours because a man was sitting outside our school in his car with a gun in hand. I texted my mom telling her what was going on and that it's on the news. She responded saying "I'll tape it". FML
by dannyboy1422 / 10/02/2009 at 3:17pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was in the bathroom defecating when I felt something hanging there. I reached back with toilet paper and starting pulling it out inch by inch; 3 feet later I learned I had a tapeworm. Worst of all, no pharmacy has the med the doctor prescribed. I have to live with this thing until the med gets here. FML
by benander / 09/15/2009 at 5:14pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy
Today, when I arrived at work, I was greeted by my gorgeous co-worker telling me my red shirt looked awesome on me. Before I could compliment her, she added the color was fitting perfectly with my acne... I heard a couple of giggles around me. FML
by 1nfected / 08/26/2009 at 1:07pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend was complaining of a scorpion sting on his leg. I told him to stop whining and get over it. Later, as I went to sleep, I felt a sharp pain in my arm. As I flipped on the light, I saw a scorpion crawling over the blankets. Now my entire arm is numb and I can't stop crying. FML
by Anonymous / 08/10/2009 at 11:18pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was listening to music while my grandma and mom were in the same room. I only had one headphone in. My mom, thinking I had both in, started telling my grandma how much of a "little bitch" I am. My grandma went on to say, "She's also a slut." FML
by Momlovesme / 08/07/2009 at 8:43pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was taking a serious shit when the light bulb burned out. I am terrified of the dark and began wailing and crying. My mom had to pick the lock and get me out. I'm a 17 year old guy and captain of the Varsity football team. My little brother recorded it and plans on showing everyone. FML
by scaredshitless / 08/07/2009 at 12:11am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was pulled over for speeding. The cop was hot so I flirted with him as much as I could. But when he came back to the car he still gave me a ticket. Feeling desperate I said, "I thought you didn't give tickets to pretty girls." His response: "We don't." FML
by Anonymous / 07/31/2009 at 9:51am / United States (Utah) / Transportation
by PTKFML / 07/26/2009 at 12:37am / United States / Intimacy
by sadgf / 07/25/2009 at 12:25am / United States (Kansas) / Love
Today, my wife gave me back my camera which she took on vacation to visit her parents with our 2-year old. I noticed the picture sequence had big gaps in the numbering. I ran an undelete on the card, and found 80+ pictures of her naked with another guy in her mom's bedroom. FML
by Anonymous / 07/16/2009 at 1:51am / United States (Texas) / Holidays
by BrianP / 07/07/2009 at 1:00pm / Netherlands (Noord-Brabant) / Money
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…