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HeyHeyFishFillet

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HeyHeyFishFillet
  • Town/Country : Los Angeles, USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 7 April 1993 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 1641
  • Number of comments : 307
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About HeyHeyFishFillet : Yea, I'm weird.

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Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

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HeyHeyFishFillet's favorite FMLs

Today, I was texting my girlfriend and asked her for a picture, expecting something provocative. She sent me a picture of her holding a positive pregnancy test. We had sex once. FML

#19758301
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14288) - you deserved it (39142)

On 06/09/2012 at 12:51am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I walked in on my mother stroking my cat and murmuring, "Don't worry, kitty. One day, you and I... we will rule." FML

#19734981
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24472) - you deserved it (2608)

On 06/04/2012 at 8:54pm - animals - by Scared (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to my girlfriend's house to break up with her. It was a hard decision and both of us became quite emotionally overwhelmed at the time. We began to hug as a final goodbye, then her mum burst in the room and yelled, "HE FINALLY PROPOSED!" FML

#19725965
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35161) - you deserved it (3262)

On 06/03/2012 at 10:21am - love - by Matt - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. She didnt look away and we stared at each other for a while; then she asked me what I wanted from McDonalds. FML

#19547170
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31423) - you deserved it (8089)

On 04/29/2012 at 11:10am - intimacy - by ShadowJack - United States

Today, I woke up to a really cold feeling down below. I opened my eyes and saw my girlfriend grinning like a maniac and holding my crotch-sausage between two scissor blades. I screamed in terror like a little bitch, and she says I'm never gonna live this down. FML

#19506149
426 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38704) - you deserved it (3514)

On 04/21/2012 at 1:38pm - intimacy - by Hakimstah (man) - Lebanon

Today, my girlfriend of four years friend-zoned me while I was proposing to her. FML

#19449963
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38905) - you deserved it (2576)

On 04/11/2012 at 2:27pm - love - by crjsej - United States (Texas)

Today, I was vomiting after an evening of drinking. My boyfriend was kind enough to hold my hair back while I spewed chunks into the toilet. Apparently he got bored though, because his hands made their way down to my boobs, which he started jiggling while singing Jingle Bells. FML

#19345098
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13448) - you deserved it (23874)

On 03/25/2012 at 2:04pm - health - by analeis (woman) - United Kingdom (Liverpool)

Today, I saw an article about how some people think internet access is more important than sex. I asked my boyfriend which he thought was more important. He chose internet access. FML

#19322341
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18183) - you deserved it (6113)

On 03/21/2012 at 7:58pm - intimacy - by justwow (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I had a debate with my girlfriend about whether giving birth or getting kicked in the balls hurts more. It ended up with her kicking me in the balls. I was the one who said giving birth hurt more. FML

#19053808
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26250) - you deserved it (5306)

On 02/12/2012 at 1:17am - love - by OwMyBalls (man) -

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why having sex with him was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty Pringles can. FML

#18772275
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11664) - you deserved it (29006)

On 01/11/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by bunnyluver4545 - United States (Texas)

Today, I tried exercising. My whole house shook. FML

#18691343
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23024) - you deserved it (12258)

On 01/02/2012 at 10:47pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, at the Black Friday Sale, a fully grown man hit my 5 year old daughter for an Xbox. In anger, I punched the guy and gave him a bloody nose. I'm now banned from Best Buy, and my daughter has a concussion. FML

#18344232
502 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43540) - you deserved it (5331)

On 11/25/2011 at 3:20am - misc - by nicoreal89 - United States (Texas)

Today, a stripper came into my work to get some posters copied. She asked if she could pay in small bills. I just touched $50 that have probably rubbed up against a stripper's twat. FML

#17529546
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23265) - you deserved it (5431)

On 08/20/2011 at 2:26pm - work - by ChePow (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I decided I was done waiting for my boyfriend to ask me to marry him, so we were cuddling in his bed and I asked him. He asked for a rain check. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I went shooting. While I was showing him how to properly hold and adjust a rifle, he accidentally pulled the trigger. The gun kicked back and hit me in the face, breaking my nose. FML

#16467969
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29048) - you deserved it (9246)

On 06/02/2011 at 1:32pm - health - by raebelle - United States



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