About HeyHeyFishFillet : Please message me, I'm lonely :(.
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Today, my daughter couldn't sleep because her pillow "felt like a rock". I asked if she wanted to use mine and she said no. She then rested her head on my stomach and promptly fell asleep. When she woke up, she told me my fat made the best pillow ever. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20006) - you deserved it (6289)
On 10/15/2009 at 1:26pm - kids - by dessaye (man) - Singapore
Today, when I arrived at work, I was greeted by my gorgeous co-worker telling me my red shirt looked awesome on me. Before I could compliment her, she added the color was fitting perfectly with my acne... I heard a couple of giggles around me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37402) - you deserved it (2391)
On 08/26/2009 at 1:07pm - misc - by 1nfected (man) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I was listening to music while my grandma and mom were in the same room. I only had one headphone in. My mom, thinking I had both in, started telling my grandma how much of a "little bitch" I am. My grandma went on to say, "She's also a slut." FML
I agree, your life sucks (46283) - you deserved it (12555)
On 08/07/2009 at 8:43pm - misc - by Momlovesme (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I came home to found all of my belongings out on the street. My roommate, who is also my brother, apparantly neglected to pay his part of the rent, and we got evicted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38368) - you deserved it (2737)
On 07/07/2009 at 1:00pm - money - by BrianP (man) - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)
Today, while working at the hospital, I had a patient with a blocked bowel. It was so bad, feces were entering into her stomach. While leaning down to talk with her, she threw up. I was both vomited and defecated on at the same time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56614) - you deserved it (2679)
On 06/04/2009 at 8:07am - work - by Mew (man) - United States (California)
Today, I decided to surprise my girlfriend and sent her an Edible Arrangement. When she called to tell me she had gotten it, she was more excited about the cute boy who delivered it than she was about the fruit bouquet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41807) - you deserved it (2650)
On 05/20/2009 at 4:01pm - love - by edible (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my grandma gave me a gift (something she has never done before). I was so excited until I found out it was one of her overdue library books on dolphins. I feel so loved. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38570) - you deserved it (2311)
On 05/04/2009 at 8:35am - misc - by hawtpinkpanties (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I was hanging out at my school with some friends when my mom came to pick me up. A girl I knew wanted a hug before I left. I turned around to hug her and a clip on my backpack got stuck on her tank top. I tuned away the clip pulled the shirt ripping it and exposing her naked chest. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55375) - you deserved it (6114)
On 04/26/2009 at 12:11am - misc - by Mikey (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my aunt informed me that she thinks I'm faking the debilitating disease I've had for the past 13 years. Apparently she thinks I just don't want to go to college or get a job, and that I like living on disability. She also added that my entire extended family agrees with her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (65321) - you deserved it (4898)
On 04/15/2009 at 1:37am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)
Today, my girlfriend of 8 years dumped me. When I asked if there was another guy, she responded, "You were the other guy". FML
I agree, your life sucks (123561) - you deserved it (8251)
On 04/13/2009 at 1:39pm - love - by blaise (man) - United States (New York)
Today, a woman drove through my house. She was texting and eating watermelon at the same time. I didn't know that was even possible, but now my house is condemned. FML
I agree, your life sucks (101822) - you deserved it (3622)
On 04/12/2009 at 9:53am - health - by Fitz (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was at the orthodontist. As the lady was clipping my brackets, she missed and clipped my gums instead. She looked at me and said, "Oh sorry, you're bleeding really badly. See, I got these fake nails put on and I guess I'm just not used to them. Let me try again." She missed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (66021) - you deserved it (1870)
On 04/09/2009 at 8:33am - misc - by BracesSuck (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I ran over a squirrel. I saw it twitching, so I backed over it to end its suffering. It wasn't a squirrel; it was a kitten. The children it belonged to watched as I ran over their kitten. Twice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (66988) - you deserved it (182528)
On 04/07/2009 at 8:11pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)
Today, I jokingly told my mom that I was having sex with my Professor. Her response was, "As long as you're getting A's, honey!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (23985) - you deserved it (40616)
On 02/21/2009 at 12:36am - intimacy - by acincollege (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I went to a fastfood restaurant to pick up food for my work party. I ordered 250 chicken fingers, 15 orders of fries, and 2 gallons of tea, and the guy behind the counter asked, "Is this for here or to go?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (32101) - you deserved it (5099)
On 02/15/2009 at 4:27pm - misc - by efffmylife - United States (Oklahoma)
Monday 17 June 2013
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