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HeyArnold91

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HeyArnold91

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 7 April 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1603
  • Number of comments : 110
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 1 posted

About HeyArnold91 : US Navy Sailor :)

HeyArnold91's page activity

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HeyArnold91's favorite FMLs

Today, a cute girl sitting next to me askd if she could use phone. As I handd it to her, I attemptd to use the expression "knock yourself out," but 4 a reason I can still not fathom, it cummd out as "kill yourself." FML

#20120541
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25563) - you deserved it (6600)

On 10/17/2012 at 12:45am - misc - by Holy Testacles (man) - United States

Today, after great sex with my boyfriend, I lay in my bed while he went to get a drink from downstars. Hearing someone come up, I shouted out as a joke, "Damn babe, I'm covered in cum, was there a hole u didn't fill?" It wasn't my boyfriend, it was my dad. FML

#20109762
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16213) - you deserved it (61205)

On 10/09/2012 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by cumhole (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today , mah wedding ring went missing. Later , mah 3-year-old came to me crying , he'd got it stuck on his penis. When I tried to get it off , he peed on me. real FML

#20108644
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34295) - you deserved it (3556)

On 10/09/2012 at 1:53am - kids - by anonymous - United States

Today, daspita having a mild casa of tha flu, I visitad my boyfriand's housa and watchad a movia with his parants . During tha movia, I falt tha suddan urga to snaaza . Trying to hold it in, I managad to do tha loudast fart I'va avar dona in my lifa . Evaryona haard . FML

#20107056
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25797) - you deserved it (5285)

On 10/08/2012 at 5:12am - love - by embarrassed (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, mah boyfriend discoverd that if he pulls out during doggy-style and rubs mah clit with the tip of his penis, he will be rewardd with a queef. He found it hilarious and testd it out 5 more times. FML

#20105380
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32044) - you deserved it (6610)

On 10/07/2012 at 6:25am - intimacy - by SoSexy (woman) - United States (California)

yesterday I wased te dise fir ma mom wile se was out, as tey seemed to be piling up . I accidentally sliced ma and wit a knife in te process . After a trip to te ospital, it was revealed se'd been leaving tose dise tere ( to teac dad a lesson . ) mega FML

#20096305
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21076) - you deserved it (1810)

On 10/01/2012 at 1:47am - misc - by Prae - United States (Texas)

TODAY IT WAS MAH UNCLE'S FUNERAL . I WASN'T VERY CLOSE WITH HIM , BUT I STILL WANTED TO BE RESPECTFUL . MY BOYFRIEND , BIENG THE JACKASS THAT HE IS , WAS SINGING THE SPIDER PIG SONG FROM THE SIMPSONS UNDER HIS BREATH WHILE MAKING HIS FINGERS WALK UP MAH LEG , TRYING TO GET UNDER MAH SKIRT . REAL FML

#20096195
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25068) - you deserved it (6489)

On 10/01/2012 at 12:23am - love - by SorryUncleTommy (woman) - United States (New York)

I had to serve my boyfriend's father looool with a restraining order. FML

#20096065
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22180) - you deserved it (1726)

On 09/30/2012 at 11:21pm - love - by notgivingup (woman) - United States

Today, mah boyfriend thought it would be funny to spank the ferret in bed an spray mehile singing the Spiderman theme song. FML

#20093277
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23025) - you deserved it (4586)

On 09/29/2012 at 5:14am - intimacy - by BabyG2222 - United States (Wisconsin)

2day I'm hiding from my creepy next-door nieghbor!! She constantly trash-talks my partner of two years, she's mentally unstable, looks to me for support, has a raging crush on me, an she drunkenly trid to make out with me last weekend!! I'm two months older than her daughter!! FML

#20090653
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19403) - you deserved it (1394)

On 09/27/2012 at 4:19am - misc - by Creeped - United States

TODAY, I SAW A SHADY LOOKING PERSON ON THE STREET. AS I WALKD PAST HIM, HE SAID, "HEY, COME HERE." THINKING HE NEEDD SOMETHING, I WENT OVER. HE HANDD ME SEVERAL PICTURES OF WIFE, IN PUBLIC AND AT HOME. I'VE NEVER SEEN THIS MAN BEFORE IN LIFE. FML

#20089025
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30179) - you deserved it (1728)

On 09/26/2012 at 12:07am - misc - by ahappypenguin -

Today, I had to pay manager $10 just to take stalker's order so I didn't have to.

#20087724
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20110) - you deserved it (2084)

On 09/25/2012 at 3:08am - work - by snowbell18 (woman) - United States

Today , I went to mah gynecologist's 4 a check-up. After the doctor checked me I went to the bathroom. It turns out the walls aren't soundproofed , because I could hear the doctor telling his assistant , "God! How did she ever find a husband?" real FML

#20087510
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24072) - you deserved it (2342)

On 09/25/2012 at 12:13am - health - by N/A (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was called into mah 17-year-old son's high school. Why? Because it was Wednesday, also known as "Hump Day" and his friends managed to convince him that your supposed to go around and hump people. FML

#20079735
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21863) - you deserved it (2543)

On 09/19/2012 at 7:33pm - kids - by Judy - United States (Pennsylvania)

yesterday a guy I've been seeing for ahile sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clickd the link just to see wat sick shit he wantd to show me. It was my mom. FML

#20079475
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59695) - you deserved it (3067)

On 09/19/2012 at 4:41pm - intimacy - by identitychangeplease - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)



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