HeyArnold91

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HeyArnold91

9Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 7 April 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2153
  • Number of comments : 110
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 1 posted

About HeyArnold91 : US Navy Sailor :)

HeyArnold91's page activity

Visits<b>FifaSkiller</b> - the 07/05/2016 at 4:55pm<b>RandomJam124</b> - the 07/05/2016 at 1:09am<b>Saxicolous</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 9:54am<b>Flegmatik</b> - the 06/27/2016 at 4:52am<b>Livin_Like_Larry</b> - the 06/25/2016 at 6:21pm<b>JimmyL_101</b> - the 06/22/2016 at 1:35am<b>weedle99</b> - the 06/09/2016 at 3:51pm<b>mermaidgirlie</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 5:45pm<b>Dreamer_in_Time</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 7:58am<b>Noah98</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 1:08pm<b>billboob</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 6:52pm<b>ScratchCatPower</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 11:43am<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 5:52am<b>sammie2new</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 10:09pm<b>rhiley</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 7:10am<b>Purexinsanity</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 9:17pm<b>n_a_v_y</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 5:46am<b>Pixanator</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 6:32pm

Fucked!<b>Dreamer_in_Time</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 1:58pm<b>rhiley</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 1:11pm<b>beautifulmymy</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 4:27pm<b>EvilPandaxD</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 3:43pm<b>JDSini</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 10:39pm<b>transwhale</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 10:54pm<b>iPixelCheese</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 10:49pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 5:41am<b>CommentKing207</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 5:41am

HeyArnold91's FML badges

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You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

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You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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HeyArnold91's favorite FMLs

Today, my 14-year-old daughter came home after sneaking out and partying. She was totally drunk, and started crying on my shoulder because some boy named "Thomas" has a small dick, and she had to fake an orgasm. FML

by valnaj1 / 12/24/2012 at 10:03pm / Denmark (Syddanmark) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I was getting pretty horny, and I thought some dirty talk would turn him on. Amid my panting, I breathed the words, "Fuck me." He then stopped and said, "Excuse me, I don't like hearing that language." and wouldn't continue until I corrected myself. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2012 at 8:32am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML

by Saradee / 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was doing a presentation in front of my boss. On the last slide, someone had put a picture of a man's cock. I later found out it was my boss who did it. It was his "good reason" to fire me. FML

by golfstar11 / 12/10/2012 at 9:05pm / United States (Georgia) / Work

Today, I went on a date with a great girl; we went out to dinner and saw a movie. After the movie, we went out to my car to find out that a homeless man had broken the window, climbed into it, and was eating the leftover pasta with his fingers. FML

by Alec / 12/10/2012 at 2:01am / United States / Transportation

Today, I went on a blind date. My date turned out to be very hot, and I had high hopes. That is, until she ran her hand through her hair as she approached, sending some kind of horrifying, miasmic mist of dandruff and dead skin floating through the air behind her. FML

by HOLY SHIT, A WALKING SNOWGLOBE / 12/09/2012 at 4:52pm / United Kingdom (Barking and Dagenham) / Love

Today, I was sitting cross-legged, idly jerkin' the gherkin. I guess I got slightly carried away, because I zoned out, forgot where I was aiming, and came all over the side of my face, up my nose and into my eye. FML

by SamWGovan / 12/09/2012 at 11:57am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, this guy I've been dating for a few months freaked out and called his mom crying, because I told him I might be pregnant with his baby. He is 27. I didn't even take a pregnancy test yet. FML

by babyblues / 11/20/2012 at 2:45pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML

by Anonymous / 11/14/2012 at 4:28pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I was at the library using a computer to order a package. A man sat down next to me mumbling to himself while staring at me. As I got up to go to the printer, he pointed at me and screamed, "I will burn you alive and enjoy it!" All of my info including my address was still on the computer screen. FML

by sarahcurtis213 / 11/13/2012 at 2:36am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was conducting a meeting regarding safety concerns on my field site. While I made a comment, a client rep yelled out that women don't know construction, and that I should be acting like a proper secretary and should get my boss. I'm the Construction Manager. FML

by ConstructionLady / 11/13/2012 at 1:49am / United States / Work

Today, I saw a folder on my son's PC named "PussyPictures". I sat him down for a talk, only to be told they contained pictures of the James Bond character Pussy Galore, for his essay about sexism in movies. He's now mocking me for "having a dirty mind". FML

by Anonymous / 10/27/2012 at 3:28pm / Germany (Bayern) / Kids

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. When she went to give me a blow job, I got embarrassed and told her I'd rather just please her instead. Now she thinks she's inadequate and I'm being a jerk. FML

by Anonymous / 10/25/2012 at 1:45am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my husband sweetly asked me, "You know what I'd really like to do if I had an extra $4,000?" Expecting a romantic answer, I asked what. He said, "I'd get you a tummy tuck." He still can't figure out what he said wrong. FML

by cargaljen / 10/20/2012 at 8:22pm / United States / Love

Today, my mom was feeling down, so I decided to buy her a gift. Knowing she likes lighthouses, I bought her a tiny one that plugs in and lights up. I brought it home, plugged it in, and when she saw me with it, she said, "Wipe that smirk off your face and get that junk out of here." FML

by NoorFML / 10/19/2012 at 10:37am / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.