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This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, in the middle of sex, my boyfriend sighed, said "I can't do this any more" and pulled out. After repeatedly asking him what was wrong, he basically told me that I suck in bed. Apparently, the way I "just lie there" makes him feel like a necrophile. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7989) - you deserved it (30507)
On 09/28/2012 at 5:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada
Today, I unintentionally moaned during my prostate exam. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24472) - you deserved it (4521)
On 09/28/2012 at 2:06pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands (Gelderland)
Today, while working security at a welfare office, I had to listen as a claimant gushed about her upcoming Caribbean cruise. I work two jobs and haven't had a vacation since 2006. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17425) - you deserved it (1075)
On 09/28/2012 at 1:40pm - work - by getajob (man) - United States (Indiana)
Today, my laptop got hit by a Trojan. Not the malware, but a used condom thrown from a car driving past as I sat on a street bench. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23365) - you deserved it (1466)
On 09/28/2012 at 4:24am - intimacy - by iNearlyHurled - United States
Today, my husband and I are still having a dumb fight over remodeling. He's decided to take an immature route and pretends to be asleep whenever I walk into a room so he doesn't have to talk about it. Earlier, he pretended to fall asleep at the dinner table. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14635) - you deserved it (2448)
On 09/28/2012 at 2:09am - love - by unhappy wifey (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I found out my ex-boyfriend of a month has a new girlfriend. That girl is my cousin, the same one who's been listening to my tears fall as I've confided my feelings to her for the past few weeks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20179) - you deserved it (1445)
On 09/27/2012 at 7:09pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Vietnam (Ho Chi Minh)
Today, I saw a dog trying to attack a man. I have experience working with aggressive dogs, so I pulled the dog off him and got it under control. The man punched me in the face for not having my dog on a leash. It wasn't my dog. I don't even own a dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21662) - you deserved it (1071)
On 09/27/2012 at 11:31am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my ex dropped by to pick up a piece of art he'd left when I threw him out a month ago. While here, he visited the restroom. Tonight, my shampoo smelled like urine. And he called at 11pm to say he'd ''rubbed one out'' on my new boyfriend's toothbrush. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14689) - you deserved it (5513)
On 09/27/2012 at 7:37am - misc - by red (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I injured myself in the geekiest way possible; I managed to crush my nipple while closing my laptop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14380) - you deserved it (5403) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 09/27/2012 at 12:10am - health - by Display - Sent from mobile version
Today, I saw a shady looking person on the street. As I walked past him, he said, "Hey, come here." Thinking he needed something, I went over. He handed me several pictures of my wife, in public and at home. I've never seen this man before in my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22432) - you deserved it (1023)
On 09/26/2012 at 12:07am - misc - by ahappypenguin -
Today, I went to eat out. When I sat down, I realized I forgot my straw. I took my purse with me, not wanting it to get stolen. Someone stole my food instead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13000) - you deserved it (1463)
On 09/25/2012 at 7:57pm - misc - by pplsuck - United States (Florida)
Today, I asked my husband to watch our daughter while I ran a few errands. While he treated himself to a long nap, she decided our fish needed a bubble bath, and squeezed out an entire bottle of dish soap. I came home to bubbles all over the floor, five dead fish, and one sleeping husband. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17072) - you deserved it (1737)
On 09/25/2012 at 6:35pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my estranged mother texted me saying, "Gran died, LOL." My grandmother and I were fairly close, so I was shocked and disgusted. I gave her the benefit of the doubt and asked if she knew what "LOL" meant. She did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22657) - you deserved it (1193)
On 09/25/2012 at 5:28pm - misc - by burn in hell (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)
Today, I realized just how clingy my boyfriend is, when he pulled out in the middle of sex, lay down and hugged me, and said in his "adorable" voice that he didn't really want to have sex, but cuddle. I wouldn't mind if it didn't happen so often. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19328) - you deserved it (3097)
On 09/25/2012 at 1:42pm - intimacy - by orgasmsareoverratedanyway (woman) - Norway (Nordland)
Today, my roommate decided to turn off all appliances in the house to "save" electricity. This included the refrigerator. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15205) - you deserved it (842)
On 09/25/2012 at 1:13pm - misc - by Jograd - Australia (New South Wales)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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