Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Helldemon

Offline (5 hours ago) | Search for a member

Helldemon

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 17 November 1983 (30 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1740
  • Number of comments : 174
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Helldemon : Electrician, Gamer, Nerd. Would like to know how to get in contact with Higher ups that run FML.

Helldemon's page activity

Visits<b>pks2014</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 9:15pm<b>brwneyes</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 9:26pm<b>hannahgreely</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 5:22pm<b>brumbeg</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 12:50am<b>jaydoug92</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 8:47pm<b>Rinat</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 7:04pm<b>pataplop</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 2:46am<b>NotAWalnut</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 1:23am<b>winnie9er9er</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 8:43am<b>ally_sanderson</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 11:04pm<b>iamareseefor</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 1:57pm<b>Tiaxlnr</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 7:08am<b>just1n12</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 2:10am<b>AE101</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 12:45pm<b>Typicall</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 6:42pm<b>charli96</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 4:53pm<b>WillowB47</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 1:58am<b>sorahearts</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 6:25pm

Helldemon's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

Picture this FML

You have left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

See all of Helldemon's badges

Helldemon's favorite FMLs

Today, I was having sex with this amazingly hot guy. Things got pretty intense, and right as I was about to orgasm, the gold crucifix came flying off his necklace and sliced my eyelid open. Message received. Well played, God. FML

#21262317
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36364) - you deserved it (5418)

On 09/21/2014 at 7:27am - intimacy - by Sinnersinner - United States (California)

Today, my idiot son tried to get a veteran's discount at American Eagle because he's "a fifth prestige" on Call of Duty. FML

#21233179
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42042) - you deserved it (6114)

On 08/09/2014 at 9:31am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that if you wake your 7-year old sister up by plugging her nose, you'll wake up the next morning, taped down and unable to move as she pours ice water on you. FML

Today, I went to a bookstore to get "The Grapes of Wrath". I have a problem with controlling the volume of my voice, so once at the counter, I accidentally said quite loudly, "WHERE ARE THE ANGRY GRAPES?" FML

#21217858
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35111) - you deserved it (11489)

On 07/22/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Face fucking palm - United States (Georgia)

Today, my friends thought it would be funny to slip a condom under my pillow at boot camp. The staff found out, I got bitched out for 30 minutes straight, and now I have to put a condom on the grip of any rifle I'm issued for a week. My new callsign is "Love Glove". FML

#21183341
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42516) - you deserved it (4395)

On 06/21/2014 at 5:42pm - misc - by LoveGlove (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was using my phone while in a crowded waiting room, and I accidentally tapped on a YouTube video with the volume still at maximum. The first words everyone heard? "Fuck her right in the pussy!" FML

#21174627
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46166) - you deserved it (22793)

On 06/14/2014 at 5:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, some alarm, somewhere in my house, is making a low battery noise. I've checked every smoke detector multiple times, and I can't find it. It has been hours. I'm not sure if its still doing it or if the sound has just invaded my brain. FML

Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML

#21113538
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51999) - you deserved it (4701)

On 04/15/2014 at 8:08am - animals - by stupiddog (man) - United States (California)

Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML

#21113538
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51999) - you deserved it (4701)

On 04/15/2014 at 8:08am - animals - by stupiddog (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had satanic gastric distress. Attempting to make light of this fact, and, being incredibly bored and seemingly alone at work, I managed to fart the intro to "Smoke on the Water" perfectly. Somebody clapped. FML

Today, I tried waxing for the first time. At first it felt like I'd dipped my balls in a furnace. Now I can't even feel them. FML

#21011655
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35722) - you deserved it (20455)

On 12/31/2013 at 2:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

#20925183
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27183) - you deserved it (39018)

On 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was hitting on a girl, and I was sure I could get her to sleep with me. When she finally gave in and was putting her number into my phone, she called my mom and asked her if she raised me to "sexually harass women." FML

#20918730
320 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21597) - you deserved it (81378)

On 10/13/2013 at 10:38am - love - by not getting laid - United States (Texas)

Today, I started to come to during dental surgery. I clearly heard someone behind me say "Shit! Get this fucker back under!" then another person mentioning they'd have to kill me to avoid "another lawsuit", followed by laughter and the blackness of sleep. FML

#20909921
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57082) - you deserved it (3375)

On 10/06/2013 at 5:49pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: