HelenKeller1

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HelenKeller1

124Fucked!

HelenKeller1HelenKeller1
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 22 August 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 12556
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About HelenKeller1 : Lindsey, 19, 😘💋 snapchat; meatloaf2012
I work at Red Lobster 💁🏻

HelenKeller1's page activity

Visits<b>Jake42121</b> - 6 hours ago<b>10nachoman10</b> - 15 hours ago<b>Generalleroy</b> - the 12/06/2016 at 12:33am<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 12/05/2016 at 9:58pm<b>Tiaxlnr</b> - the 12/05/2016 at 4:04pm<b>Captobvious19</b> - the 12/05/2016 at 2:25pm<b>chewsef</b> - the 12/05/2016 at 12:04pm<b>firefighterbee</b> - the 12/04/2016 at 11:26pm<b>MoDDbest</b> - the 12/04/2016 at 4:10pm<b>Lct1196</b> - the 12/04/2016 at 8:42am<b>Mons</b> - the 12/03/2016 at 11:37pm<b>Toonice45</b> - the 11/28/2016 at 11:35pm<b>james08</b> - the 11/28/2016 at 2:36pm<b>Blizzicus</b> - the 11/28/2016 at 5:48am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 11/27/2016 at 2:21pm<b>notmedo</b> - the 11/27/2016 at 4:51am<b>ChristDesi</b> - the 11/26/2016 at 2:02am<b>OmgitsJay</b> - the 11/24/2016 at 12:42pm

Fucked!<b>Jake42121</b> - just now<b>Generalleroy</b> - the 12/06/2016 at 6:34am<b>Toonice45</b> - the 11/29/2016 at 5:35am<b>tengo</b> - the 11/19/2016 at 6:17am<b>Nolimit22177</b> - the 11/16/2016 at 10:06pm<b>orios105</b> - the 11/14/2016 at 8:26pm<b>Mons</b> - the 11/09/2016 at 8:19pm<b>2simz</b> - the 11/06/2016 at 4:12am<b>jaysoccer27</b> - the 10/26/2016 at 6:35am<b>Chris_1414</b> - the 10/21/2016 at 2:03pm<b>vaas90</b> - the 10/20/2016 at 12:34pm<b>stryder9090</b> - the 10/18/2016 at 3:01pm<b>hunter1019</b> - the 10/16/2016 at 11:19pm<b>madnessking</b> - the 10/10/2016 at 4:35pm<b>Lct1196</b> - the 10/08/2016 at 4:17am<b>Ih8teenageangst</b> - the 10/07/2016 at 10:56pm<b>chewsef</b> - the 10/07/2016 at 6:09am<b>stuckintime</b> - the 10/07/2016 at 5:52am

HelenKeller1's FML badges

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of HelenKeller1's badges

HelenKeller1's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad was telling me some childhood stories. He mentioned I once started sucking on a cow's udder when I was 2, and I asked why didn't he stop me. His response: "You were an accident and I wasn't good at the parenting thing". FML

by gotmilk? / 09/22/2015 at 9:41am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was with my girlfriend at lunch when a group of guys came over. They started calling her a whore and a bunch of other shit, so I cussed them out. Turns out she was not only cheating on me, but all the other guys too. FML

by Jgfenix / 09/21/2015 at 8:24pm / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, I heard a noise outside in the middle of the night, so I went out for a look. I'm also pregnant and can't stop farting. I get 2 steps outside and accidentally let a huge one rip, then, from the shadows I hear "Oh my god!" and then running in the opposite direction. I farted away a prowler. FML

by Gassy / 09/21/2015 at 10:45am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out the real cause of what I assumed was a healthy increase in my teenage daughter's appetite lately. Some fine young gentlemen with a fat fetish convinced her start gaining weight so they could jack off to her. FML

by bluep313 / 09/18/2015 at 1:03pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Kids

Today, while eating at my college cafeteria, I started thinking about all the awful crap going on in my life right now, and I started sobbing. Some guy at another table started snickering at me, at which point the guy I like said, "Give her a break. If I was as fuck-ugly as her, I'd be crying too." FML

by Anonymous / 09/13/2015 at 9:21am / United Kingdom (Bristol, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that no, my period arriving several days late doesn't mean I have AIDS. FML

by T___T / 09/11/2015 at 9:54pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, while at a neighborhood party, my drunk mother told all our neighbors, including a girl I like, about my struggles with a micropenis. FML

by annonymous / 09/07/2015 at 4:56pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, the girl I like at work surprised me in the otherwise empty break room. She caught me taking part in what might as well have been the Ball-Scratching Olympics. I didn't notice she was behind me until she cleared her throat to get my attention. Shit. FML

by ballthlete / 09/06/2015 at 12:55am / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous

Today, I met my fiancé's much older sister for the first time. Turns out she is actually my old high school English teacher who used to make me cry at least 3 times a week. It's been three hours and I've accidentally called her Miss Willow 4 times and been reduced to tears twice. FML

by Alice / 08/30/2015 at 8:13am / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was shopping with my girlfriend, when I saw my best friend. I jokingly did a double-take and said I didn't recognize him with his clothes on. We laughed, talked a bit, then went our separate ways. My girlfriend later dumped me, claiming I'm blatantly gay and cheating on her. FML

by cuckoo / 08/21/2015 at 11:59pm / United States (Alabama) / Love

Today, the professor I've had a crush on informed me that there's only one way left I could still pass his course. Thinking this was an attempt to flirt with me, I told him I'd do anything he could imagine. He then looked confused when he asked me to write an essay. FML

by notwhatithought / 08/21/2015 at 3:43pm / Germany (Bayern) / Miscellaneous

Today, I scolded my son at a buffet after he pointed at an obese woman in a motorized wheelchair and asked how anyone could let themselves get so unhealthy. As I lectured him on genetics and thyroid problems, she rolled past with a plate stacked with an obscene amount of fried food. FML

by fuck / 08/21/2015 at 2:22pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, my sister recorded the sound of me having intense diarrhea, retching at the stench, and eventually breaking down in tears. I only found out when I saw she'd posted it online, with the caption "lol #gaytard #sorrynotsorry". I've never been called a pussy by so many people before. FML

by Anonymous / 08/19/2015 at 8:14am / United States (California) / Health

Today, a guy asked me out on Facebook, then called me a conceited bitch when I said no. I don't know, dude; maybe it's just that I already have a boyfriend, that you asked me out on Facebook, and that you posted the same message on 4 other girls' walls as well. FML

by sonice / 08/17/2015 at 11:39pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, after hearing the doctor saying my girlfriend can never be pregnant, I got a bit too excited. I'm currently on the 5th hour of the silent treatment. FML

by Anonymous / 08/17/2015 at 4:33am / United States / Health