HelenKeller1

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Offline (the 07/10/2016 at 9:30pm)

HelenKeller1

94Fucked!

HelenKeller1HelenKeller1
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 22 August 1997 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 10841
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About HelenKeller1 : Lindsey, 18, 😘💋 snapchat; meatloaf2012
I work at Red Lobster 💁 22 piercings & counting.

HelenKeller1's page activity

Visits<b>doubledutchy</b> - yesterday at 6:32am<b>WinterChild</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 9:19pm<b>Mons</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 9:35am<b>frankmz</b> - the 07/20/2016 at 11:53pm<b>slapstick1982</b> - the 07/20/2016 at 7:48pm<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 07/20/2016 at 1:36am<b>Adamjohn82</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 12:25pm<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 1:48am<b>delfino1604</b> - the 07/17/2016 at 10:05am<b>majoroftheair</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 10:41am<b>fastman19</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 6:57am<b>Soninuva</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 9:11am<b>Hyperkeratosin</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 8:10am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/12/2016 at 4:32pm<b>A_Wilson0311</b> - the 07/12/2016 at 4:16pm<b>MoDDbest</b> - the 07/10/2016 at 9:04am<b>laynethefirst</b> - the 07/10/2016 at 5:46am<b>qsxsqsxs</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 3:32pm

Fucked!<b>Adamjohn82</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 6:25pm<b>Hyperkeratosin</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 2:10pm<b>DrowningLessons</b> - the 07/07/2016 at 2:05am<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 3:08pm<b>Kruitdamp</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 11:03pm<b>Emanpirate68</b> - the 06/11/2016 at 7:39pm<b>daveyyyyh</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 3:32pm<b>davidaloco123</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 9:06am<b>laynethefirst</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 12:39pm<b>yungblkrich</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 7:12am<b>AustinDenton</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 11:24pm<b>marshm610</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 11:05pm<b>Magnoxidans</b> - the 05/07/2016 at 7:18pm<b>OmgimBored</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 3:36am<b>ChugTheBleach</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 9:47pm<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 04/23/2016 at 2:44pm<b>duduv2</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 5:26am<b>fastman19</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 12:50pm

HelenKeller1's FML badges

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of HelenKeller1's badges

HelenKeller1's favorite FMLs

Today, while looking through my son's browser history, I found a Google search for "stop looking in my history u nosey cunt". I swore last week that I don't invade his privacy, so I can't even punish him for the bad language without looking like a lying bastard. FML

by Hank-T4 / 10/11/2015 at 7:45am / Australia (Victoria) / Kids

Today, I told one of my classmates for the third time that I'm not into guys and wasn't interested in going on a date with him. He just looked at me blankly and said "So I'll pick you up at 9?" FML

by Anonymous / 10/07/2015 at 9:45am / Belgium (Antwerpen) / Work

Today, I found out my boyfriend has an account on a sex hookup site. He said it has "interesting articles" and that he'd completed his profile and listed his sexual preferences out of boredom. When I told him to sign in and prove he hadn't been messaging girls, he refused and called me paranoid. FML

by single once again / 10/07/2015 at 3:41am / Cyprus (Nicosia) / Love

Today, I was having lunch and I started throwing crumbs at my friend at the other table. Then I accidentally hit the kid next to him. He got really mad and came over and hit me in the shoulder with a brick. A brick. He just had a brick in his bag. FML

by horp / 09/29/2015 at 6:00pm / United States (Connecticut) / Work

Today, while showering, I broke the cap off the shampoo. Not my shampoo, my roommate's. The $60 shampoo I swore I wouldn't touch. FML

by GabyLeann / 09/28/2015 at 10:01pm / United States / Money

Today, I found out that my contact name in my girlfriend's phone is "Dipshit McFucktard". FML

by Anonymous / 09/26/2015 at 8:08am / United States / Love

Today, after my second date with an otherwise charming guy, he called me a whore for turning him down for sex. Yeah, I'm trying to work out the logic of that too. FML

by Anonymous / 09/25/2015 at 10:36pm / Australia / Love

Today, a guy kept flirting with me despite all my hints for him to kindly fuck off and die, so I lied and said I'm a lesbian. This didn't stop him. It got so bad, I had to claim I was born with a dick and say that's why I like girls. Only then did he say "Eeewww..." and back off. FML

by Thai that on for size / 09/25/2015 at 3:56pm / New Zealand (Hawke's Bay) / Love

Today, it's the third week of my dad's midlife crisis. So far he's blown half my college fund pimping out his piece of shit car, keeps texting me meme pictures, and keeps yelling "Savage!" and "Recked!" any time my mom makes a joke at anyone's expense. FML

by Colin Jr. / 09/23/2015 at 9:24am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad was telling me some childhood stories. He mentioned I once started sucking on a cow's udder when I was 2, and I asked why didn't he stop me. His response: "You were an accident and I wasn't good at the parenting thing". FML

by gotmilk? / 09/22/2015 at 9:41am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was with my girlfriend at lunch when a group of guys came over. They started calling her a whore and a bunch of other shit, so I cussed them out. Turns out she was not only cheating on me, but all the other guys too. FML

by Jgfenix / 09/21/2015 at 8:24pm / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, I heard a noise outside in the middle of the night, so I went out for a look. I'm also pregnant and can't stop farting. I get 2 steps outside and accidentally let a huge one rip, then, from the shadows I hear "Oh my god!" and then running in the opposite direction. I farted away a prowler. FML

by Gassy / 09/21/2015 at 10:45am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out the real cause of what I assumed was a healthy increase in my teenage daughter's appetite lately. Some fine young gentlemen with a fat fetish convinced her start gaining weight so they could jack off to her. FML

by bluep313 / 09/18/2015 at 1:03pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Kids

Today, while eating at my college cafeteria, I started thinking about all the awful crap going on in my life right now, and I started sobbing. Some guy at another table started snickering at me, at which point the guy I like said, "Give her a break. If I was as fuck-ugly as her, I'd be crying too." FML

by Anonymous / 09/13/2015 at 9:21am / United Kingdom (Bristol, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that no, my period arriving several days late doesn't mean I have AIDS. FML

by T___T / 09/11/2015 at 9:54pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love