Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

HelenKeller1

Offline (the 08/29/2015 at 12:41am) | Search for a member

HelenKeller1

33Fucked!

HelenKeller1HelenKeller1
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 22 August 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 7531
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About HelenKeller1 : Lindsey, 17, 😘💋 snapchat; meatloaf2012

HelenKeller1's page activity

Visits<b>mclint_</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 10:52pm<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 4:22pm<b>marktimemark</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 7:46pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 12:42pm<b>CowTippingDwarfs</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 12:56am<b>the_rude_dude</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 1:36am<b>sexymomo1234</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 2:54am<b>PaulChristie</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 2:18pm<b>Mons</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 1:06am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 5:08am<b>buckstop1</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 2:10pm<b>ARetardedSeal</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 1:05am<b>JustAnotherJose2</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 6:04pm<b>nomrana</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 1:16am<b>moron011</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 10:17pm<b>Twill3422</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 2:12pm<b>mhb210</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 8:10pm<b>Yazoo77</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 12:07am

Fucked!<b>CowTippingDwarfs</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 10:23pm<b>buckstop1</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 8:11pm<b>Twill3422</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 9:00am<b>Martermelon</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 6:41am<b>demonte_jones</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 2:49am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 10:26pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 1:55pm<b>TheDog6</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 4:18am<b>Yazoo77</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 1:17am<b>Joshery</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 7:50pm<b>colton_colton</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 5:13am<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 7:32pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 3:37am<b>khoov19</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 7:21am<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 11:01pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 2:39pm<b>allred1997</b> - the 07/09/2015 at 8:30am<b>babeybazooka</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 11:15pm

HelenKeller1's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of HelenKeller1's badges

HelenKeller1's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he could finally go down on me. He said, "No, that's disgusting" and then asked me for a blowjob. FML

#21207695
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63908) - you deserved it (8266)

On 07/13/2014 at 3:46am - intimacy - by NoSexForMe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend was feeling down because she has put on some weight. I tried to make her feel better by showing her I can still pick her up. I can, and I was even able to hide the fact that I shat myself doing it. I'm so romantic. FML

#21200680
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53236) - you deserved it (8264)

On 07/06/2014 at 3:28pm - love - by oh shit (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my students turned in their male figure artwork. One absolute idiot had the smart idea of drawing me and the TA as some kind of gay lovers. I was torn between disgust at the explicitness, anger at the disrespect, and yet awe at how well-drawn it was. FML

#21165062
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45250) - you deserved it (6554)

On 06/06/2014 at 3:00pm - work - by confusing (man) - Zimbabwe

Today, I realized that when a girl asks what your plans are for Valentine's Day and you say "nothing" and she responds with, "Oh, I don't have any plans either", it means she wants you to take her out. Took me three months to figure that out. FML

#21145130
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35602) - you deserved it (55538)

On 05/19/2014 at 1:15pm - love - by clueless - United States (California)

Today, I received yet another rejection letter from a college I'd applied to. After crying for a week about how lousy I felt, my older sister gave me all 6 of the acceptance letters she'd been hiding. Turns out she's been forging rejection letters and keeping the real ones in her room. FML

#21140332
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70547) - you deserved it (5251)

On 05/15/2014 at 1:40am - misc - by livingamongtheflowers - United States

Today, I took a pregnancy test because I'd missed a few periods, gained weight, and been moody. Turns out I'm just fat and moody. FML

#21139495
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48313) - you deserved it (11058)

On 05/14/2014 at 9:12am - health - by thanks4support - United States (Ohio)

Today, I flexed so hard for a selfie, I gave myself a hernia. FML

#21138987
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23626) - you deserved it (67829)

On 05/13/2014 at 7:46pm - health - by ShutTheFuCupcake (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I nervously flirted with a very cute guy. Being a little overweight, I rarely think cute guys will go for me. This line of thinking was yet again correct when he casually pulled his sleeve up revealing a tattoo of a pinup girl with a "NO FAT CHICKS" sign below it. FML

#21138042
357 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56103) - you deserved it (7165)

On 05/12/2014 at 7:49pm - love - by nofatchicks (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, some girl in the street mistook me for Richard Simmons. FML

#21134956
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34665) - you deserved it (5505)

On 05/09/2014 at 4:31pm - misc - by romancocks - United States (Florida)

Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML

#21133762
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39147) - you deserved it (20945)

On 05/07/2014 at 11:57pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got a new dentist. You know how most dentists play soft, relaxing music? Well this guy seems to like rap a lot, and it's kinda hard getting your teeth cleaned to the sound of bullets going off. FML

#21131626
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41274) - you deserved it (4537)

On 05/05/2014 at 5:51pm - health - by randomusername99 - United States (New York)

Today, things were getting heated with the girlfriend. We were mostly naked, but mostly wouldn't do, so I kissed her deeply and whispered into her ear, "You should lose some weight". Clothes. I meant to say clothes. FML

Today, I was at the mall with a couple of friends when we saw a couple of cute boys. I made eye contact with the cutest one. Flustered, I giggled, only to send a wad of snot flying out of my nose. FML

#21067978
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44570) - you deserved it (7852)

On 02/21/2014 at 9:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I opened up a snapchat from my best friend. I received a full and detailed view of her and her boyfriend having sex. All I wanted to know was how her Valentine's Day dinner went. FML

#21060866
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53926) - you deserved it (9267)

On 02/14/2014 at 10:21pm - intimacy - by waymoreiwanted (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, the boy who sits next to me in class accidentally dropped his sketch pad. It turns out he's really talented at drawing portraits. They're so good that I could recognize myself in all of them. FML

#21058436
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47720) - you deserved it (7385)

On 02/12/2014 at 8:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: