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HelenKeller1

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HelenKeller1

62Fucked!

HelenKeller1HelenKeller1
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 22 August 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8636
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About HelenKeller1 : Lindsey, 18, 😘💋 snapchat; meatloaf2012
I work at Red Lobster 💁 I'm a busy person but I try to answer messages, so ask me anything 😊

HelenKeller1's page activity

Visits<b>10nachoman10</b> - 24 hours ago<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 10:43pm<b>fmlnjd2013</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 6:24pm<b>javankipp</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 3:59pm<b>Mons</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 2:01pm<b>Shayn_25</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 9:26am<b>am1717</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 3:39am<b>WinterChild</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 1:28am<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 6:16pm<b>S232Flash</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 5:13am<b>MoDDbest</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 5:34am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 12:14am<b>spursfan101</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 1:24pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 12:07pm<b>JusstJef</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 6:11am<b>Ethan_Anonymous</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 6:01pm<b>Linemanmike</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 5:15am<b>johny93</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 2:44pm

Fucked!<b>MoDDbest</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 8:52pm<b>fmlnjd2013</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 8:47am<b>JusstJef</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 3:26pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 9:28pm<b>ThatKidFromLA</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 9:03pm<b>johny93</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 3:15am<b>Jake42100</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 8:00am<b>DARKDAY07</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 6:06am<b>dbyrne20</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 1:43am<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 10:55am<b>chandler88</b> - the 12/16/2015 at 4:38pm<b>ardenxo</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 6:35am<b>youngmessi252525</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 2:11am<b>commanderstiff</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 9:33pm<b>Linemanmike</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 12:00am<b>WinterChild</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 6:58pm<b>pred8885</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 6:25am<b>holymacabre</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 5:29am

HelenKeller1's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of HelenKeller1's badges

HelenKeller1's favorite FMLs

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

#21228111
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52467) - you deserved it (22925)

On 08/03/2014 at 1:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I went to a comedy show with my mom, and they asked the audience members to yell out their problems as ideas for an improv skit. My mom yelled, "My daughter can't get a boyfriend!" FML

#21222137
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46423) - you deserved it (4682)

On 07/27/2014 at 2:44pm - misc - by Yeppets (woman) - United States

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he could finally go down on me. He said, "No, that's disgusting" and then asked me for a blowjob. FML

#21207695
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65499) - you deserved it (8423)

On 07/13/2014 at 3:46am - intimacy - by NoSexForMe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend was feeling down because she has put on some weight. I tried to make her feel better by showing her I can still pick her up. I can, and I was even able to hide the fact that I shat myself doing it. I'm so romantic. FML

#21200680
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56762) - you deserved it (8459)

On 07/06/2014 at 3:28pm - love - by oh shit (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had to go pick up my kid, because he threw up while playing at his friend's house. The boy's mother bitched me out for not keeping my son at home while he was "ill". Her breath was unspeakably foul. So foul that it caused me to throw up too. FML

#21192088
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52767) - you deserved it (3870)

On 06/29/2014 at 12:16am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I asked my dad if he'd like to see the photos of my wedding, which he didn't bother to come to. Reply: "What the fuck, are you gay or something? Keep that homo stuff to yourself." My wife started laughing so hard she was crying. FML

#21180887
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49752) - you deserved it (5187)

On 06/19/2014 at 5:05pm - love - by Fuck you, Dad. Fuck you. (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my older brother managed to convince my younger sister that she's actually a boy, and that she'll soon be getting a penis in the mail, which she excitedly told everyone she could. He convinced me of the exact same thing as well several years ago. FML

#21174074
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47804) - you deserved it (6822)

On 06/14/2014 at 2:42am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, a guy I had been casually seeing asked me to dinner. Thinking he could be wanting to make things serious, I got all dressed up. Turns out he got a girlfriend and just wanted to tell me in person to avoid things being awkward. We then waited in silence for our meal. FML

Today, my students turned in their male figure artwork. One absolute idiot had the smart idea of drawing me and the TA as some kind of gay lovers. I was torn between disgust at the explicitness, anger at the disrespect, and yet awe at how well-drawn it was. FML

#21165062
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46061) - you deserved it (6644)

On 06/06/2014 at 3:00pm - work - by confusing (man) - Zimbabwe

Today, I realized that when a girl asks what your plans are for Valentine's Day and you say "nothing" and she responds with, "Oh, I don't have any plans either", it means she wants you to take her out. Took me three months to figure that out. FML

#21145130
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36529) - you deserved it (57129)

On 05/19/2014 at 1:15pm - love - by clueless - United States (California)

Today, I received yet another rejection letter from a college I'd applied to. After crying for a week about how lousy I felt, my older sister gave me all 6 of the acceptance letters she'd been hiding. Turns out she's been forging rejection letters and keeping the real ones in her room. FML

#21140332
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71677) - you deserved it (5332)

On 05/15/2014 at 1:40am - misc - by livingamongtheflowers - United States

Today, I took a pregnancy test because I'd missed a few periods, gained weight, and been moody. Turns out I'm just fat and moody. FML

#21139495
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49105) - you deserved it (11277)

On 05/14/2014 at 9:12am - health - by thanks4support - United States (Ohio)

Today, I flexed so hard for a selfie, I gave myself a hernia. FML

#21138987
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23958) - you deserved it (68739)

On 05/13/2014 at 7:46pm - health - by ShutTheFuCupcake (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I nervously flirted with a very cute guy. Being a little overweight, I rarely think cute guys will go for me. This line of thinking was yet again correct when he casually pulled his sleeve up revealing a tattoo of a pinup girl with a "NO FAT CHICKS" sign below it. FML

#21138042
350 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59777) - you deserved it (7585)

On 05/12/2014 at 7:49pm - love - by nofatchicks (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, some girl in the street mistook me for Richard Simmons. FML

#21134956
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35737) - you deserved it (5611)

On 05/09/2014 at 4:31pm - misc - by romancocks - United States (Florida)



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