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Heather_x0x0

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  • Number of visits : 1703
  • Number of comments : 124
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Heather_x0x0's favorite FMLs

Today, I was trying out for my school's athletics team. As I reached the finish line for the 100m sprint, there was so much momentum I couldn't stop. I ended up running into a wall. FML

#15273802
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24827) - you deserved it (7218)

On 03/11/2011 at 9:33am - misc - by uncoretard -

Today, my dad bought a one hundred dollar collectible light-saber. He plays with it. In the front yard. With sound effects. FML

#15243539
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32375) - you deserved it (7016)

On 03/08/2011 at 8:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I went snowboarding and fell backwards, hitting my head on a patch of ice. When I got home, I told my brother I thought I might have a concussion. He told me I should be a man and suck it, swiftly smacking my head, causing me to pass out. FML

#15221158
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33690) - you deserved it (3139)

On 03/06/2011 at 7:50pm - health - by milkndstufff (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I informed my grandparents of my upcoming graduation from college. My grandma looked at me with tears in her eyes, and told me how proud she was that I was able to make it so far in spite of being autistic. I am not, nor have I ever been autistic. FML

#15170920
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36252) - you deserved it (2994)

On 03/02/2011 at 12:24am - misc - by Acesup111 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML

#15165919
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17608) - you deserved it (83105)

On 03/01/2011 at 6:51pm - intimacy - by Anon. (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, an old lady hit me with her car. After which she says, "Oh! Not Again!" FML

#15150765
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28634) - you deserved it (2413)

On 02/28/2011 at 10:50am - misc - by roadkill - United States

Today, I lost a glove while snowboarding. I got off my board to find it, when a bunch of kids took the opportunity to kick my snowboard down the hill, while yelling "Run, Forrest, run!" as I frantically chased after it. FML

#15115506
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29621) - you deserved it (3928)

On 02/25/2011 at 3:37pm - misc - by gumpy (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I ate at Chipotle. There was a girl sitting alone, so I asked if I could eat lunch with her. She said yes, and as I sat down I tried to open my bag of chips. When trying to do so, my hand slipped, and I punched myself in the face. She laughed, and promptly left. FML

#15021227
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26728) - you deserved it (7058)

On 02/17/2011 at 10:02pm - misc - by justmyluck? -

Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bare to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML

#1815627
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (426166) - you deserved it (59701)

On 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm - animals - by catlady (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

#836792
927 comments

I agree, your life sucks (350763) - you deserved it (38697)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

#527227
520 comments

I agree, your life sucks (241856) - you deserved it (32155)

On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)



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