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Haydn202020

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Haydn202020

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  • Number of visits : 559
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Haydn202020's page activity

Visits<b>MilkyFilmz</b> - the 06/30/2013 at 11:52pm

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Haydn202020's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend nicknamed my vagina after a local waterpark. It wasn't even that annoying until his friends started asking me how much I charged to let people "ride n' slide". FML

#20768896
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53776) - you deserved it (5625)

On 07/07/2013 at 4:07pm - intimacy - by roseland (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend told me that he was going to buy me a "magic wand". Being a Harry Potter fanatic, I assumed he meant a replica wand. It turns out he actually meant a Magic Wand vibrator. I was more excited about the HP wand. FML

#20758994
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44676) - you deserved it (8833)

On 07/01/2013 at 11:37pm - intimacy - by whorecrux (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boss threatened to fire me for killing him in Minecraft. FML

#20571304
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35034) - you deserved it (7595)

On 04/02/2013 at 6:30am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, after heavy rain my street flooded. While in my living room, I looked outside to see that my elderly neighbour was outside splashing in a knee deep puddle. He was butt-naked and wearing a snorkel and flippers. FML

#20492744
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27601) - you deserved it (3196)

On 02/04/2013 at 4:15am - misc - by Stunned (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I learned my neighbor can access my wireless printer from his house after it started printing off pictures of what I'm assuming is his penis. FML

#20461046
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42155) - you deserved it (7011)

On 01/15/2013 at 4:58pm - intimacy - by itsrathersmall (woman) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. In the entrance way I felt a slight tugging on my jeans. Used to my Doberman tugging when he wants to play, I shoved hard with my foot. I successfully punted their Chihuahua off the ground and into the next room where it landed with a thud. FML

#20460283
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19741) - you deserved it (36408)

On 01/15/2013 at 2:33am - animals - by I think its dead (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he flicks my clitoris just right, my legs both twitch spastically regardless of arousal level. He thinks it's hilarious and can no longer take sex seriously. FML

#20423881
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40504) - you deserved it (4806)

On 12/26/2012 at 4:20pm - intimacy - by geewhy (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, in the middle of the night, I got up to go get some water. When I came back, I was going to flop onto my bed, but I faceplanted into my floor. I'd forgotten that I'd rearranged my room and moved my bed. FML

#20406748
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33062) - you deserved it (19027)

On 12/19/2012 at 12:07am - misc - by ayye_its_nikki - United States (Texas)

Today, a friend informed me that my dog's name means "penis" in Greek. I live in a predominantly Greek neighbourhood, and apparently I've been screaming for "dong" every evening for the past 3 years. No wonder they don't talk to me much. FML

#20405418
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30008) - you deserved it (8569)

On 12/18/2012 at 10:30am - misc - by Dog_Lover (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, while I was sitting on the toilet, my toddler swung the door open. We just bought the house, and we have no curtains. Our new neighbor, who I haven't met, was mowing her yard. I stood half-naked to close the door, and our eyes met. I froze. She waved. FML

#20154142
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19657) - you deserved it (2091)

On 11/07/2012 at 8:41pm - misc - by ohcrap (man) - United States

Today, I had to explain to my 22-year-old boyfriend that mice do not grow up to be rats. FML

#20096649
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20393) - you deserved it (2358)

On 10/01/2012 at 10:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I was babysitting a six year old girl, when I saw a huge spider on the wall. I screamed and told her to stay back. Instead, she walked up to the spider, squished it, and told me to stop being such a baby. FML

#20095198
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9775) - you deserved it (26199)

On 09/30/2012 at 1:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML

#19902817
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10424) - you deserved it (24199)

On 07/07/2012 at 12:08am - misc - by totallyembarassed - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I slammed my middle finger in a drawer. I screamed and my mom came running into the kitchen. She asked me what was wrong, so without thinking I stuck up my middle finger. She hasn't spoken to me since this morning. FML

#19848843
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24818) - you deserved it (5342)

On 06/26/2012 at 2:05am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, after spending about 5 grand on my home studio over the past year, I realized I have no musical talent whatsoever. FML

#19660967
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7068) - you deserved it (33033)

On 05/22/2012 at 3:34am - misc - by gaga - United States (California)



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