HamsteronA

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HamsteronA

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5006
  • Number of comments : 232
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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HamsteronA's page activity

Visits<b>Miss_Whipped</b> - the 08/18/2016 at 3:56pm<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 08/16/2016 at 5:13pm<b>human321</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 12:42am<b>starchyflops</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 6:28am<b>Celeden</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 10:26am<b>twerking_riggs</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 4:09pm<b>Etaisten</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 6:47pm<b>Mukuro</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 4:51pm<b>16bees</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 12:59am<b>khloelpcn</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 7:37pm<b>accidentalsheep</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 9:37pm<b>mushroomcassette</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 6:47pm<b>qwerty401</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 6:34pm<b>DuncanHills</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 3:22am<b>McDerpface</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 2:14am<b>5secondsofvvifi</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 8:58pm<b>mip_92</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 11:42pm<b>azelk</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 7:13pm

Fucked!<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 08/16/2016 at 11:13pm<b>16bees</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 6:59am

HamsteronA's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

HamsteronA's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because he said the relationship was too tough for him. When I asked for an example, he responded, "Like, I don't have enough time to play World of Warcraft." FML

by Noname / 02/12/2009 at 10:46pm / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, I tried hallucinogenic mushrooms for the first time with my friend. Little did I know, they last for around 6 hours, and I had class at 3, when I had to give a presentation in front of 30 people. FML

by facepalmshroomer / 02/07/2009 at 6:24pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend was about to give me a blowjob. When her lips met my penis, there was a huge static shock. I never got the blowjob, she is still laughing and I have ice on my penis. FML

by beerpong26 / 02/06/2009 at 2:54pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I was looking after my parents house and their wiener dog, and fell asleep on the couch. The dog climbed onto my shoulders and rested behind my head like a doggie neck pillow. All was great until she farted right in my left ear. FML

by Noname / 02/01/2009 at 11:31pm / United States (Nebraska) / Animals

Today, I have been reading FML for 12 hours. FML

by ayw329 / 01/31/2009 at 8:51am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I sneezed so hard I herniated my back. After passing out from the pain I awoke on the floor covered in my own shit and piss. Unable to move, I had to wait in this state for four hours for my wife to return home from work, clean me up and take me to the hospital. FML

by Noname / 01/26/2009 at 7:02pm / Japan (Fukuoka) / Health

Today, in class, I asked my teacher for a "rubber". I didn't realise that in America "rubber" doesn't mean "eraser", it means condom. FML

by TheEnglishOne / 01/22/2009 at 7:42pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was hanging out with a couple of friends and one of them tells a funny story about how he filled a condom with syrup and put it in his friend's mouth while he was asleep. Me with my big mouth starts to say, "Condoms taste na--" and stopped myself as everyone started laughing at me. FML

by jen / 01/15/2009 at 7:39pm / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to cuddle Simon, my five year old son. He wriggled away and said: "If you need a teddy bear, go buy one! Or find another Simon!" FML

by sly / 01/03/2009 at 10:55pm / Kids

Today, my flatmate was listening to opera on full volume all afternoon and now he's playing James Bond on the trumpet. FML

by noname / 12/29/2008 at 1:09am / Miscellaneous

Today, I needed to go to the toilet. Thinking that everyone had left work, I decided that, since I AM a Jedi, my penis ought to be my lightsaber. All of a sudden I hear a familiar voice: "At least someone is having fun!" It was my boss. FML

by lopez / 12/15/2008 at 10:58pm / Work

Today, I'm heading towards my car clutching a bunch of flowers for my girlfriend, when along comes a sweet old lady who says: "it's not flowers she wants, it's some lovin'!". The elderly sure aren't what they used to be. FML

by DarkPhoenix / 12/04/2008 at 6:16am / Miscellaneous

Today, my philosophy teacher asked me about my parents. I replied that my mum was a cleaner and my dad was a bus driver. In an astonished voice, she said, "But, you're clever..." FML

by lamb-chop / 12/02/2008 at 1:32am / Miscellaneous

Today, when I woke up, my husband was already up. Thinking I hear him in the hall I shout out "come on, don't be shy, bring that cock in here right now!". A voice replies: "he's gone out to get some bread". It was my mother-in-law. FML

by Tinker-Bell / 11/20/2008 at 10:41pm / Intimacy

Today, we had some family over. A nasty need to wank seized me when I saw her: my 17-year-old cousin. I went to my parents' unoccupied bedroom. My sister's baby walkie-talkie was switched on, and the whole family heard me. FML

by VIVI / 10/25/2008 at 12:55pm / Intimacy