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HamsteronA

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HamsteronA

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4482
  • Number of comments : 232
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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HamsteronA's page activity

Visits<b>khloelpcn</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 7:37pm<b>accidentalsheep</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 9:37pm<b>mushroomcassette</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 6:47pm<b>qwerty401</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 6:34pm<b>DuncanHills</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 3:22am<b>McDerpface</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 2:14am<b>5secondsofvvifi</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 8:58pm<b>mip_92</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 11:42pm<b>azelk</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 7:13pm<b>anormalperson</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 2:41am<b>ilikeirony</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 3:09am<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 8:40pm<b>blondie1018</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 10:51pm<b>blakelastovica</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 10:44am<b>jtthegr8</b> - the 03/14/2014 at 7:41am<b>Hello9875</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 4:42pm<b>Tuxwonder</b> - the 02/04/2014 at 11:42am<b>marlenavalenta</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 4:40pm

HamsteronA's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

HamsteronA's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because he said the relationship was too tough for him. When I asked for an example, he responded, "Like, I don't have enough time to play World of Warcraft." FML

#34266
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47601) - you deserved it (7333)

On 02/12/2009 at 10:46pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Arizona)

Today, I tried hallucinogenic mushrooms for the first time with my friend. Little did I know, they last for around 6 hours, and I had class at 3, when I had to give a presentation in front of 30 people. FML

#13772
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8842) - you deserved it (77554)

On 02/07/2009 at 6:24pm - misc - by facepalmshroomer (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my girlfriend was about to give me a blowjob. When her lips met my penis, there was a huge static shock. I never got the blowjob, she is still laughing and I have ice on my penis. FML

#11750
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47644) - you deserved it (6470)

On 02/06/2009 at 2:54pm - intimacy - by beerpong26 - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was looking after my parents house and their wiener dog, and fell asleep on the couch. The dog climbed onto my shoulders and rested behind my head like a doggie neck pillow. All was great until she farted right in my left ear. FML

#5060
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18839) - you deserved it (6462)

On 02/01/2009 at 11:31pm - animals - by Noname - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I have been reading FML for 12 hours. FML

#4028
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39525) - you deserved it (14637)

On 01/31/2009 at 8:51am - misc - by ayw329 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I sneezed so hard I herniated my back. After passing out from the pain I awoke on the floor covered in my own shit and piss. Unable to move, I had to wait in this state for four hours for my wife to return home from work, clean me up and take me to the hospital. FML

#2729
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46476) - you deserved it (2341)

On 01/26/2009 at 7:02pm - health - by Noname - Japan (Fukuoka)

Today, in class, I asked my teacher for a "rubber". I didn't realise that in America "rubber" doesn't mean "eraser", it means condom. FML

#2256
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62464) - you deserved it (8190)

On 01/22/2009 at 7:42pm - intimacy - by TheEnglishOne - United States (California)

Today, I was hanging out with a couple of friends and one of them tells a funny story about how he filled a condom with syrup and put it in his friend's mouth while he was asleep. Me with my big mouth starts to say, "Condoms taste na--" and stopped myself as everyone started laughing at me. FML

#1302
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6497) - you deserved it (24855)

On 01/15/2009 at 7:39pm - misc - by jen - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I tried to cuddle Simon, my five year old son. He wriggled away and said: "If you need a teddy bear, go buy one! Or find another Simon!" FML

#697
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27044) - you deserved it (3086)

On 01/03/2009 at 10:55pm - kids - by sly - Sent from mobile version

Today, my flatmate was listening to opera on full volume all afternoon and now he's playing James Bond on the trumpet. FML

#621
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20649) - you deserved it (2903)

On 12/29/2008 at 1:09am - misc - by noname - Sent from mobile version

Today, I needed to go to the toilet. Thinking that everyone had left work, I decided that, since I AM a Jedi, my penis ought to be my lightsaber. All of a sudden I hear a familiar voice: "At least someone is having fun!" It was my boss. FML

#523
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8624) - you deserved it (31262)

On 12/15/2008 at 10:58pm - work - by lopez - Sent from mobile version

Today, I'm heading towards my car clutching a bunch of flowers for my girlfriend, when along comes a sweet old lady who says: "it's not flowers she wants, it's some lovin'!". The elderly sure aren't what they used to be. FML

#449
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23412) - you deserved it (3185)

On 12/04/2008 at 6:16am - misc - by DarkPhoenix - Sent from mobile version

Today, my philosophy teacher asked me about my parents. I replied that my mum was a cleaner and my dad was a bus driver. In an astonished voice, she said, "But, you're clever..." FML

#434
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31854) - you deserved it (2016)

On 12/02/2008 at 1:32am - misc - by lamb-chop - Sent from mobile version

Today, when I woke up, my husband was already up. Thinking I hear him in the hall I shout out "come on, don't be shy, bring that cock in here right now!". A voice replies: "he's gone out to get some bread". It was my mother-in-law. FML

#351
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44281) - you deserved it (16572)

On 11/20/2008 at 10:41pm - intimacy - by Tinker-Bell - Sent from mobile version

Today, we had some family over. A nasty need to wank seized me when I saw her: my 17-year-old cousin. I went to my parents' unoccupied bedroom. My sister's baby walkie-talkie was switched on, and the whole family heard me. FML

#37
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25272) - you deserved it (113610)

On 10/25/2008 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by VIVI -



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