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Hai_Its_Marisa

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Hai_Its_Marisa

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 706
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Hai_Its_Marisa : normal people scare me

Hai_Its_Marisa's page activity

Visits<b>Mexico_WC2018</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 10:15pm<b>Kamon97</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 10:14pm<b>madelief129</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 3:30am<b>jaysinlove</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 6:03pm<b>monkeycrutch</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 5:11am<b>_parth</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 9:32pm<b>Wrex</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 8:59pm<b>alllisonnn</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 8:58pm<b>totallylosing</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 10:23pm<b>blexzy</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 2:44pm<b>omfgorlaith</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 7:10am<b>123yeah</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 4:52pm<b>logan1423</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 11:24am<b>HeyTherexxx</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 3:20am<b>Shayaan</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 12:28am<b>97mailo</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 12:02am<b>I_Am_A_Rock</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 11:09pm<b>watdoisay</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 10:57pm

Hai_Its_Marisa's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of Hai_Its_Marisa's badges

Hai_Its_Marisa's favorite FMLs

Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend yelled, "STUFF ME LIKE A TURKEY!" I couldn't finish. FML

#21112870
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55831) - you deserved it (7038)

On 04/14/2014 at 4:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was on a date with my boyfriend. As we walked back home from the cinema, he was checking his phone, when suddenly someone grabbed it and ran off. I had to be the one to go run after the thug because my 23-year-old boyfriend froze on the spot, crying. FML

Today, I went out drinking with my tattoo artist brother-in-law. I was so wasted that I agreed to let him try working on me. I woke up with a tattoo of an animated marijuana plant smoking a cigarette. This'll look just great when I'm defending clients in court. FML

#21107817
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24031) - you deserved it (41750)

On 04/08/2014 at 6:04pm - misc - by not a dumbass pothead (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I got up early in the morning to get a snack, only to walk in on my "vegan" housemate eating a turkey sandwich. This bastard harasses me every other day about my meat-eating, but all he could do after he noticed me was drop the sandwich and claim he'd been sleepwalking. FML

#21104594
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38059) - you deserved it (3100)

On 04/04/2014 at 6:07pm - misc - by fuck you with a bacon cock (man) - United Kingdom (Moray)

Today, I was at Walmart and had to use the bathroom. I sat down and farted real loud. I didn't realize someone was in there with me until I heard a voice say, "Dude, that was a good one." It was a man's voice. I then realized I was in the men's restroom. FML

#21095689
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46960) - you deserved it (11869)

On 03/24/2014 at 11:39pm - misc - by dani (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was walking and saw a quarter. I bent down to pick it up. Barely a foot ahead there was another, so I crawled over to get it. This continued for about six feet when I realize a kid was laying them out in a trail. I had collected 7 fake quarters and the kid had it on video. FML

#21087786
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40526) - you deserved it (19465)

On 03/15/2014 at 11:46pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I tried to kill a spider by throwing a shoe at it. All it did was slice the spider's egg sac open, releasing all its babies. FML

#21076106
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52379) - you deserved it (13341)

On 03/02/2014 at 5:38pm - animals - by Anonytard - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had satanic gastric distress. Attempting to make light of this fact, and, being incredibly bored and seemingly alone at work, I managed to fart the intro to "Smoke on the Water" perfectly. Somebody clapped. FML

Today, I texted my boyfriend of two years and asked if he wanted to go to ball with me. His response was "The person you are trying to message cancelled their phone service and moved to Mexico. Taco taco burrito." I'll take that as a no. FML

#21024175
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45878) - you deserved it (5181)

On 01/11/2014 at 12:55am - love - by rollergirl13 - United States (Alaska)

Today, my boss found out that my girlfriend dumped me. He asked if that meant she would no longer bring her delicious homemade cookies to the office. When I said yes, he fired me on the spot. FML

#20990683
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47078) - you deserved it (2982)

On 12/12/2013 at 10:08pm - work - by justin (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

#20972170
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30999) - you deserved it (14715)

On 11/27/2013 at 3:44am - health - by MissYouPieceOfSkin (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had a family get-together for my birthday. I got to watch all my family members get piss-drunk and argue over who's having the worst time. FML

#20971273
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37358) - you deserved it (3137)

On 11/26/2013 at 11:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my 7 year old daughter explained to a taxi driver that she was born from my "vagina that doesn't have hair". He winked creepily at me and said, "I bet it doesn't." FML

#20970485
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41815) - you deserved it (5197)

On 11/25/2013 at 6:42pm - misc - by jazopalchris (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I was quite drunk so I decided to take a piss kneeling down, so I wouldn't miss. I dropped the toilet seat on my little soldier. FML



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