Guuurlplease

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Guuurlplease

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6158
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Guuurlplease's page activity

Visits<b>KribAndSpek</b> - the 10/06/2015 at 4:26pm<b>ThatOneChick856</b> - the 10/02/2015 at 1:17pm<b>JinglePoo</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 10:50am<b>noah_1234</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 7:13pm<b>PrincessJelly12</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 5:28pm<b>VHNox</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 11:44pm<b>RedAlert0</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 5:56pm<b>Iwannabetreo</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 5:46pm<b>hararah99</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 1:49am<b>RivalSeal</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 7:14pm<b>anonymoususer24</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 9:45pm<b>mego019</b> - the 05/17/2013 at 5:02pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 2:01am

Guuurlplease's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Guuurlplease's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom told me I was conceived on Halloween. She thought it would be funny to say "Let's just say your dad was not wearing his ghost costume." She then winked. I am now scarred for life. FML

by anonymous.. / 09/02/2010 at 8:29pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I learned that my apartment's walls are thin enough for my neighbors to hear my vibrator. I've lived in this apartment for three years. I've been single and horny for all of them. FML

by Buzzie / 09/02/2010 at 5:09pm / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy

Today, at a restaurant, I was joking around trying to make my friend laugh by pretending to be a ninja. I did this by putting my napkin in front of my face. I happened to look over at another table and saw that a lady wearing a burqa was giving me the most evil glare I have ever seen in my life. FML

Today, I realized that it wasn't my science partner that smelled bad, it was me. How? The guy I have a crush on handed me a stick of deodorant and said, "Please use it." FML

by Oops / 08/27/2010 at 12:06am / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, I was working as a camp counselor helping a five year old girl. I heard her mumble, "My grandpa is getting married on Saturday." I enthusiastically replied and told her how exciting that was! Only after did I realize that she said 'buried'. FML

by counselor / 08/25/2010 at 12:32pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, while grabbing a husk of corn out of the boiling hot pot, I splashed hot water on my neck, dropped the corn on my injured toe, and cut myself on the counters, all while my family laughed at my pain. FML

by klutz / 08/25/2010 at 12:14am / Canada (New Brunswick) / Miscellaneous

Today, after struggling with an eating disorder and hiding my symptoms for months, I got up the courage to tell my mom that I need help. Then she asked if an ice cream would make me feel better. FML

by nothanks / 08/22/2010 at 9:42am / United States (Minnesota) / Health

Today, I heard my mother and father having sexual intercourse, and I found out that my mother moans the same way as my girlfriend. Guess who I now think about every time my girlfriend moans? FML

by shawty / 08/22/2010 at 8:14am / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

by Bailey / 08/22/2010 at 2:58am / United States (Nebraska) / Kids

Today, at work, I stopped in my boss/boyfriend's office to find him getting intimate with a girl. He then tells me that he is cheating on me, that he is dumping me, and that I am fired. Oh, and he is keeping the cat. FML

by jemstuff / 08/22/2010 at 2:28am / United States (Maryland) / Work

Today, I found out that my boyfriend is only staying with me for the present I promised him for his birthday. FML

by arace15336 / 08/22/2010 at 2:17am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my boyfriend started to kiss my boobs. I am pregnant and started my lactation period. Now every time he looks at me he calls me milky way. FML

by ananomus / 08/22/2010 at 12:26am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I took my brother and nieces to the zoo. Two of the lions at the exhibit were mating, so I said, "They're playing leap-frog." My 4-year-old niece said, "Looks like they're fucking to me." FML

by mc_dreamy / 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, while leaving a restaurant, a little boy grabbed onto my leg and screamed, "Mommy! Don't leave me!" Then he looked up at my face, said, "Ewww," and ran away screaming in fear. FML

by superconfused16 / 08/20/2010 at 6:36pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, one of my cousins offered to sell me his mac for a low price. When I got it, I realized it was an old toshiba painted white with an apple sticker on it. My cousin still insists it's a mac. FML

by roflcopter / 08/18/2010 at 8:53pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous