Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Gurior

Search for a member

Gurior

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1102
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 9 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Gurior's page activity

Visits<b>skierak97</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 3:36am<b>DedicatedNova</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 11:59pm<b>tessabrooke06</b> - the 09/03/2013 at 7:10am<b>ninjaswaggy</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 6:23am<b>LaxBro19</b> - the 05/30/2013 at 10:52pm<b>haw008</b> - the 05/26/2013 at 12:35am<b>JillianBall</b> - the 05/20/2013 at 10:05pm<b>odod777</b> - the 05/15/2013 at 10:38am<b>AfroCircusMan</b> - the 05/15/2013 at 8:03am<b>jordinaelise</b> - the 05/13/2013 at 10:10am<b>kooldinosaur4427</b> - the 05/12/2013 at 6:47pm<b>neeena94</b> - the 05/07/2013 at 1:29pm<b>wellithappens</b> - the 05/06/2013 at 8:31pm<b>GabrielleFrance</b> - the 05/01/2013 at 6:10pm<b>Marmarfarfar</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 5:12pm<b>BrittyHope</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 12:55am<b>native_susana</b> - the 04/26/2013 at 5:55pm<b>missalice0306</b> - the 04/26/2013 at 4:45pm

Gurior's FML badges

One ring to rule them all

You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of Gurior's badges

Gurior's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were laying in his bed. I was watching the Terminator on T.V. A commercial came on in the middle of the movie. We just started having sex when the movie came back on he said "I'll be back." in the Arnold Schwartzenegger accent and rolled over to watch the movie. FML

#6705813
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17010) - you deserved it (3810)

On 12/11/2009 at 4:26am - intimacy - by Tee (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I woke up and looked in the mirror and noticed that my face was covered in glitter. I asked my wife about it and she said she put it on me while I was sleeping so that I would sparkle like Edward from Twilight when I'm in the sunlight. FML

#6494130
299 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59653) - you deserved it (6380)

On 11/28/2009 at 12:32pm - love - by IB6UB9 - United States

Today, it was the elections for Student Council President. I decided to be nice and vote for the only other competitor because it was her birthday. I lost by one vote. FML

#5876259
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16378) - you deserved it (45326)

On 10/18/2009 at 8:25am - misc - by presidont (woman) - Switzerland

Today, I had a wet dream. The problem was that I was dreaming about watching porn. I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML

#5851325
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19949) - you deserved it (3546)

On 10/16/2009 at 1:27pm - intimacy - by damnit (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was fired for not attending a mandatory meeting. I confronted my boss and told her I never heard anything about it, she told me that daily reminders had been sent out via email for weeks. She then discovered that she failed to enter my email address in the system. I was still fired. FML

#5607614
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47519) - you deserved it (2359)

On 10/02/2009 at 5:31pm - work - by Rae (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my english teacher asked me why I didn't have my project completed. Thinking quick on my feet I told her it was because my grandmother had just passed away. Apparently they go to the same country club and have known each other for years. My teacher started crying and ran out of the room. FML

#5607225
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7702) - you deserved it (65097)

On 10/02/2009 at 5:07pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went into work. After three years of working 55 hours a week they fire me by putting the contents of my locker at the front door that said "if not picked up by 10:00 am stuff will be donated." I work the night shift. I just lost three sweaters, two pairs of shoes, $60 and my job. FML

#5413535
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38913) - you deserved it (2249)

On 09/22/2009 at 1:08pm - work - by unemployed (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to cover for my coworker who didn't turn up for work. He is always late for work and I was pissed off about having to cover for him again so I said to my colleagues "He better be either in hospital or dead." Turns out he was dead. FML

#5403982
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39836) - you deserved it (12546)

On 09/21/2009 at 10:06pm - work - by mcdeez (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was at work, finishing a presentation for my boss. Five minutes after I presented it to him, his boss walked in and asked for the same presentation I had just given. My boss presented it. His boss then turned to me and asked me "what use are you around here?" FML

#5328947
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37559) - you deserved it (2379)

On 09/18/2009 at 7:08am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Iraq (Dhi Qar)

Today, while my girlfriend and I were getting it on, she suddenly stopped and yelled "STOP!". I stopped, scared I'd hurt her. She then yelled "HAMMER TIME!" and started to dance. We never finished. FML

#5286193
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27019) - you deserved it (4929)

On 09/16/2009 at 1:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, at my cashier job, I got written up for accepting obviously photocopied coupons. Last week, I got written up for "inadequate customer service" because I refused to accept the same bogus coupons from the same customer. FML

#5279131
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42259) - you deserved it (1968)

On 09/15/2009 at 7:39pm - work - by bonedregardless (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I finally agreed to the threesome that my husband has been trying to persuade me to have. We arranged it with my hot best friend, thinking I would be more comfortable with her. I ended up lying naked beside them, watching them have fun. FML

#5163523
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14001) - you deserved it (34223)

On 09/10/2009 at 2:25am - intimacy - by wallflower (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got stuck in an elevator for 45 minutes. I am an elevator mechanic. FML

#5163293
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36709) - you deserved it (6207)

On 09/10/2009 at 2:02am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I got stuck in an elevator for 45 minutes. I am an elevator mechanic. FML

#5163293
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36709) - you deserved it (6207)

On 09/10/2009 at 2:02am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I got stuck in an elevator for 45 minutes. I am an elevator mechanic. FML

#5163293
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36709) - you deserved it (6207)

On 09/10/2009 at 2:02am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: