GumpyGobbler

Search for a member

Online

GumpyGobbler

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 6 July 1934 (81 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 734
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About GumpyGobbler : "I like bitches and blunts" - Abe Lincoln

GumpyGobbler's page activity

Visits<b>demix</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 3:50am<b>FitFriday</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 12:43pm<b>mrmcleod</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 3:36pm<b>devildog562</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 2:33pm<b>Loomunati</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 4:50pm<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 9:25am<b>rt567</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 1:02pm<b>king_waldoVII</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 1:23am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 11:46am<b>Deadpool47</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 5:43pm<b>KhaleesiStorm</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 7:59am<b>DaggNabbit</b> - the 02/22/2014 at 6:06pm<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 02/11/2014 at 1:12pm<b>andy345</b> - the 02/11/2014 at 10:09am<b>Haileyed</b> - the 02/11/2014 at 8:24am<b>itzdj</b> - the 01/07/2014 at 12:18am<b>nonnieluv</b> - the 11/13/2013 at 12:47pm<b>paige146622</b> - the 08/24/2013 at 10:48pm

GumpyGobbler's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

See all of GumpyGobbler's badges

GumpyGobbler's favorite FMLs

Today, my father, who is not familiar with keyboards, had me register his new email account for him at the public library. His username choice? "Wang dang sweet poon tang". People heard. FML

by cassieleigh1 / 11/05/2015 at 12:05am / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while looking through my son's browser history, I found a Google search for "stop looking in my history u nosey cunt". I swore last week that I don't invade his privacy, so I can't even punish him for the bad language without looking like a lying bastard. FML

by Hank-T4 / 10/11/2015 at 7:45am / Australia (Victoria) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend fed a "random mushroom from the woods" to my rabbit. It then had a violent seizure and died. He claims it must have been from "natural causes". FML

Today, I got an angry call from my 7-year-old son's school. It turned out that while doing a "what I want to be when I'm older" assignment, he wrote that he wants to be an internet troll so he can make people mad and make them kill themselves. FML

by Anonymous / 09/23/2015 at 11:48am / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, I heard a noise outside in the middle of the night, so I went out for a look. I'm also pregnant and can't stop farting. I get 2 steps outside and accidentally let a huge one rip, then, from the shadows I hear "Oh my god!" and then running in the opposite direction. I farted away a prowler. FML

by Gassy / 09/21/2015 at 10:45am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband and I arrived in Barbados on vacation. We visited a club, and they had a selection of drinks with weird names. My husband ordered one called the Raging Bitch, flicked his finger towards me, and said to the barkeeper, "Might as well get something I'm used to." FML

by Anonymous / 08/04/2013 at 12:45pm / Barbados (Saint Michael) / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I went to my parents' barbecue. He knew my family is extremely religious, so what did he do? Called for silence to make an announcement, namely: "God isn't real." Cue a riot that ended in us being kicked out and me all but disowned for "putting him up to it". FML

by he's a dawk, and a cunt / 07/05/2013 at 6:29pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, two Jehovah's Witnesses rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied, "Basic reasoning?" A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits you in the eye. FML

by Goaway / 08/14/2011 at 7:20am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML

by badmom / 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy