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Gum

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Gum

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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1967
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

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Gum's page activity

Visits<b>Thursdayxo</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 3:56am

Gum's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Gum's favorite FMLs

Today, while taking a drug test for a volunteer job, I found out that I have a "shy bladder". It took me ages to pee into a cup. I was congratulated and clapped for by complete strangers when I finally left for taking a piss. FML

#2569917
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39716) - you deserved it (3927)

On 06/03/2009 at 4:06pm - work - by peeepeee. - United States (Ohio)

Today, I meant to express to my friends that I was enamored with a young saleswoman I had encountered at a store. I wanted to tell them that she was quite petite and that I am, in general, attracted to petite women. Instead I said "You know? I like little girls." FML

#2556869
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18149) - you deserved it (55640)

On 06/03/2009 at 1:23am - love - by boinger (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

#2532710
1165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83785) - you deserved it (221834)

On 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm - animals - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I flew from Chicago to San Francisco to get some of my stuff out of a storage unit. I left the keys for the padlock at home. FML

#2530639
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19471) - you deserved it (48319)

On 06/02/2009 at 12:14pm - misc - by Tom (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had to give a presentation about Adolf Hitler. I wanted to point out he was a very good speaker, and could incite a crowd. Instead, what came out was 'Hitler's oral skills made everyone go wild with excitement" FML

#2508726
299 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36143) - you deserved it (61397)

On 06/01/2009 at 7:12pm - misc - by Cail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while shopping in the FML store I bought the "Retro Sport Tee," I didn't notice you are supposed to put your own "FML" on the shirt. Mine says "Today, Your Text Here. FML." FML

#2459150
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22726) - you deserved it (75485)

On 05/31/2009 at 8:03am - misc - by deucelututi - United States (New York)

Today, I was performing CPR on a woman on her floor while her internal defibrillator kept firing, making her whole body jump. When it fired, her hand went straight up into my nuts. FML

#2271670
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49346) - you deserved it (3602)

On 05/25/2009 at 11:14am - work - by EMT_Koulianos (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. After what seemed like an eternity of waiting, he finally entered me, then paused and asked me, "what do I do now?" FML

#718937
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (129675) - you deserved it (14565)

On 03/31/2009 at 1:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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