About GuessWhatKids : I like weed and underground rap. If my comment was bad or pissed you off, good. The hivemind tendencies here in FML are ridiculous.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Today, out of habit, after scratching my balls, I then smelt my hand. It was at that moment I realized most of my gym was staring at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4315) - you deserved it (30544)
On 08/08/2012 at 10:00am - misc - by FutureMarine3658 - United States (Utah)
Today, some new people moved into the house next door to mine. The previous occupants were very loud and obnoxious day in and day out, so I was looking forward to some sanity. When I went outside, I noticed they'd parked their cars on my lawn. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15332) - you deserved it (896)
On 08/06/2012 at 1:57pm - misc - by 44magnumtime (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I found my husband's journal, and along with it the real reason he took so long to show up to our wedding rehearsals last year. According to the journal, it was because he was too busy wooing a married mother of five and sticking his "slut-banger all up in that fat booty." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21903) - you deserved it (1891)
On 07/20/2012 at 10:12pm - misc - by divorce? i think so (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8841) - you deserved it (31178)
Today, I found out that the phone number I switched to, used to host an amateur phone sex hotline. I found this out after getting several calls by teenagers, who sounded as if they were masturbating even as I yelled that they had the wrong number. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17455) - you deserved it (1057)
On 06/26/2012 at 5:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I noticed that my son only really looks like me when he's straining to take a dump. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13198) - you deserved it (2434)
On 06/23/2012 at 8:10pm - kids - by Gremlin (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)
Today, my parents made a list of all the things they could have done had I not been born. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23651) - you deserved it (2039)
On 06/19/2012 at 12:42pm - intimacy - by theunborn - France (Midi-Pyrenees)
Today, I decided to motivate myself to workout by looking at a picture of a guy with a six-pack on my computer screen while doing abs. My dad walked in after I finished and was still breathing heavily from working out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18032) - you deserved it (4808)
On 06/16/2012 at 1:45am - misc - by NotGay (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I received the photos my friend took of me proposing to my girlfriend. I'd proposed at the place we'd first met: the local zoo. When I looked them over, I noticed there was an elephant taking a poop in the background. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17220) - you deserved it (2807)
On 06/15/2012 at 1:12pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I went to meet my girlfriend's parents at her sister's play. The moment I introduced myself, I realized that her father was my probation officer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24695) - you deserved it (13468)
On 06/10/2012 at 5:16am - love - by fernie vazquez - United States (California)
Today, I was in a business meeting. I was giving a Powerpoint presentation to my boss and a few other associates. Then a notification popped up in the middle of my presentation reminding me that I needed to renew my pornhub subscription. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9961) - you deserved it (31329)
On 06/08/2012 at 7:58am - work - by WaffleMan (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my sister, knowing that I'm terrified of his face, taped a picture of Michael Jackson over our toilet. When I entered the washroom, I sprinted back out screaming. Minutes later, while in the shower, I happened to glance up at the ceiling. Guess who was grinning down at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20687) - you deserved it (7339)
Today, during the early hours, I got hungry and went to grab something to eat. I entered the kitchen, only to see my stark-naked dad sitting at the table, eating cereal and reading the paper. He just nodded at me and said, "Son." I think I need a new pair of eyes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15933) - you deserved it (1479)
Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend in bed after a round of amazing sex. He decided it would be a great time to stick his finger up my nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16361) - you deserved it (3097)
On 06/07/2012 at 12:02am - intimacy - by C0r1nn3 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, as a medical student working in a hospital, I asked a patient if he had any questions for me or his physician. His only question: whether or not my breasts are real. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14753) - you deserved it (2560)
On 04/14/2012 at 12:08am - work - by falafalo (woman) - United States
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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