Grootensliven

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Offline (the 03/12/2015 at 5:10pm)

Grootensliven

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 29 December 1995 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2609
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Grootensliven : I like monsters Lamborghini hockey and mountain biking.

Grootensliven's page activity

Visits<b>theBalloonPerson</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 11:05am<b>axfabxdisaster</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 4:53pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 6:36am<b>oops6663</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 12:01pm<b>imdone2008</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 2:01am<b>iTzCole03</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 8:44am<b>marulicko</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 5:15am<b>Tbear11</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 3:20am<b>JVVortex</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 12:18am<b>Etched</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 11:11pm<b>TheMarshmellow</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 9:57pm<b>itsjohannna</b> - the 01/18/2014 at 11:52pm<b>mareegiraffe19</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 10:50pm<b>Justified12</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 6:35pm<b>junkman6</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 3:33pm<b>SaintJupiter</b> - the 11/27/2013 at 2:57am<b>MandyCat484</b> - the 11/26/2013 at 1:30pm<b>stj5249</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 11:55pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 12:36pm

Grootensliven's FML badges

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Keen reader – Level: student ninja

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Grootensliven's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a text from an unknown number saying, "You shouldn't be eating that." I was eating a piece of chocolate, cheating on my diet. FML

by LucidNightmare / 01/27/2013 at 12:38am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, my daughter learned a new song. This would be great, except for the lisp her teacher has. I now have a child screaming about the "itchy bitchy spider" at the top of her lungs. FML

by ugh / 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm / United States (Michigan) / Kids

Today, when I got home I noticed a statue of a gnome sitting next to the door. I've had an intense phobia of gnomes since I was a child, and I can't bring myself to walk past it. It's been half an hour and I'm still standing outside. I can see my dad through the window laughing and waving. FML

by VampObsessed / 01/05/2013 at 12:30am / United States (Texas) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my ex-boyfriend of over 4 years decided to turn up outside my house at 1am, drunk off his ass, to confess his love for me. When I told him I'd moved on and am happily engaged, he cried on the grass for an hour, then tried to steal my cat. FML

by Anonymous / 12/26/2012 at 12:18pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, a woman at work was complaining about her weight. She looked pretty thin, so to make her feel better, I said that she looked small. She said "Well, you haven't seen me naked." For some reason, I replied, "Not that you know of." FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2012 at 1:37am / United States (North Carolina) / Work

Today, the guy I'm dating found out I have severe arachnophobia. He downloaded a picture of a huge, hairy spider and set it as background on my iPhone. I can't even unlock my phone, as every time I try, the spider pops up and I drop the phone. He laughs every time I do it. FML

by skinnybitch / 12/11/2012 at 1:09pm / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Love

Today, I was playing with my four year old cousin. He had a toy whale and said, "Shark!" I corrected him and told him it was a whale. He picked it up, threw it at my face, and yelled, "SHAAARK!" FML

by Anonymous / 11/24/2012 at 8:59am / United States / Kids

Today, I got into a car accident. The guy wouldn't give me his information, but instead stood there saying, "Like a good neighbor, Statefarm is there." FML

by Read The Fine Print / 11/24/2012 at 12:55am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I woke up after a night of drinking to find that while I was passed out someone stole my prosthetic leg. FML

by poserpilot / 11/12/2012 at 10:10am / United States (California) / Health

Today, whilst in an argument with my girlfriend, I told her she was the craziest bitch I'd ever met. She responded with "Challenge accepted." I'm now terrified. FML

by Andrew / 10/30/2012 at 2:08am / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, I noticed a rather small man being harassed by a rather large man, so I tried to help out and break it up. The small guy punched me in the face and said, "Mind your business!" The large guy laughed and fist-bumped him. FML

by Nice Guy / 10/29/2012 at 3:55am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while driving with my puppy in the passenger seat, he jumped out of the window. FML

by puppylove / 10/20/2012 at 3:16am / United States / Animals

Today, while mowing the lawn, I was attacked by an underground hornet nest. I now have many stings, two scared dogs, and a mower still running outside. The hornets are swarming it and some are sitting on the lever, as if to turn it off. It's like they know. FML

by Anonymous / 10/17/2012 at 4:08pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, after much reluctance due to fear of causing a huge debate, I finally posted something on Facebook about the presidential debates. However, the post sparked an argument with my mom's childhood best friend, that ended with her telling me that my dad isn't actually my dad. FML

by bastardchild_01 / 10/17/2012 at 2:22am / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to buy groceries while suffering horrible morning sickness. My nausea magnified as I stood in line behind an obese lady wearing a tank top and tiny short shorts. I lost everything in my stomach when she stuck her hand down her shorts and started scratching at her ass-crack. FML

by Anonymous / 10/04/2012 at 2:10pm / United States (Nebraska) / Health