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Gray_H

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Gray_H
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 87
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Gray_H's favorite FMLs

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

#21023934
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44414) - you deserved it (8167)

On 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my dog found out how to turn my Xbox off. So whenever he wants attention, guess what he does. FML

#21019316
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46244) - you deserved it (15923)

On 01/06/2014 at 6:00pm - animals - by Z3R0G5 (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I pulled over a speeding driver. I admit that I'd been hoping for this moment since I joined the police force; the moment a lady put her cleavage on display to get out of a ticket. Sadly, this lady was a senior citizen, and her breasts looked like two semi-deflated balloons. FML

#20977282
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43183) - you deserved it (19276)

On 12/01/2013 at 6:07pm - work - by fuck my eyeballs (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got pulled over on the highway for going over the speed limit. The cop seemed nice, and I was sure he'd let me off with a warning, until my husband piped up with, "Didn't think you folks came out this far. What, the donut store got shut down or some shit?" I got the ticket. FML

#20975844
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42242) - you deserved it (5633)

On 11/30/2013 at 2:21pm - money - by yulis (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my family and I finished moving to Texas. As if that isn't bad enough, I'll have to introduce myself all over again to everyone I meet and explain that yes, my parents really did name me Lilypad. FML

#20973574
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44647) - you deserved it (3662)

On 11/28/2013 at 11:53am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I rushed to a dentist's appointment. Once in the chair, I apologized for not having had the time to brush my teeth beforehand. He responded with, "Ah that's alright, I just took a piss and forgot to wash my hands." FML

#20937985
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43198) - you deserved it (11320)

On 10/29/2013 at 2:57pm - health - by Anonymous - Zimbabwe

Today, my husband and I were watching Jurassic Park. At the end of the movie, he commented on how amazed he was that they could "train those dinosaurs" to do exactly what they wanted them to do. FML

#20937890
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44303) - you deserved it (4581)

On 10/29/2013 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my daughter told me she is pregnant. The father is the foreign exchange student who just moved back to Germany. FML

#20887524
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47606) - you deserved it (4356)

On 09/19/2013 at 6:30am - kids - by monkey (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found my elderly neighbour on all fours in my garden eating my flowers. FML

#20836671
112 comments

Today, while cleaning my ears with Q-tips, I came in my pants. FML

#20835942
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45719) - you deserved it (16289)

On 08/13/2013 at 7:53pm - intimacy - by ANON (man) - United States (California)



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