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Grand_Cookie

Offline (the 04/30/2015 at 8:09am) | Search for a member

Grand_Cookie

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 17977
  • Number of comments : 206
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Grand_Cookie : I'm the gorilla, so don't ask.

Blah blah blah, random facts about me. Blah blah blah, other stuff i like. Blah blah blah, some inspirational quote. Blah blah, purple unicorns, blah.

Redheads>Jesus

Grand_Cookie's page activity

Visits<b>Pop_And_Lock</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 9:22pm<b>Psychotique</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 9:09pm<b>HairyPunisher</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 10:10am<b>jessenia123</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 1:35am<b>Camwentz</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 1:48am<b>Soccerboi15</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 4:20pm<b>wantmeasandwich</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 10:23am<b>Eyeslick</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 11:06am<b>happy2468</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 12:17pm<b>raynedropps</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 12:26am<b>roo94</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 4:08pm<b>marshm610</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 7:41pm<b>spookyboy</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 5:57am<b>sarahmsw20</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 10:52am<b>chode124</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 7:35pm<b>MrsPegg</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 12:20pm<b>Epickiller</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 6:45am<b>cdncw</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 2:07pm

Fucked!<b>MrsPegg</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 6:20pm<b>truecowboy</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 6:10am

Grand_Cookie's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Grand_Cookie's badges

Grand_Cookie's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the park and sat down on a bench to enjoy my coffee. I heard a few young girls behind me talking about how their first experience of sex was. I turned around to see how old these girls really were. One of them was my daughter. FML

#14737614
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60905) - you deserved it (7176)

On 01/27/2011 at 10:35pm - intimacy - by JordanVilleneuve (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend, who's on a diet, refused to give me a blow job because my sperm would "add useless calories" to her day. FML

#14677100
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38558) - you deserved it (13955)

On 01/22/2011 at 7:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my dentist pulled a pubic hair out of my braces. FML

#14672798
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18432) - you deserved it (51019)

On 01/22/2011 at 11:04am - intimacy - by mortified (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, whilst having sex, my husband screamed out a man's name. FML

#14671725
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52977) - you deserved it (4841)

On 01/22/2011 at 8:00am - intimacy - by fmlalways - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, my mum told me how I was only here because my dad couldn't pull out in time. FML

#14671096
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38673) - you deserved it (3208)

On 01/22/2011 at 5:03am - intimacy - by Theaccident (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while skiing, I really needed to pee. The instructor pointed me towards some bushes. I slid over to them, and pulled my panties down. My skis then started sliding back down the slope. I ended up gliding through the bushes, all the way down to the rest of the group. FML

#14670797
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30335) - you deserved it (7815) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/22/2011 at 3:49am - misc - by sandra22 - Sent from mobile version

Today, while skiing, I really needed to pee. The instructor pointed me towards some bushes. I slid over to them, and pulled my panties down. My skis then started sliding back down the slope. I ended up gliding through the bushes, all the way down to the rest of the group. FML

#14670797
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30335) - you deserved it (7815) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/22/2011 at 3:49am - misc - by sandra22 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I rode home alone on a train. I accidentally missed my stop, but wasn't worried about it. My mom did not share my optimism and actually called the train company, saying that I was "lost" and "special". They thought she meant I was retarded. They wouldn't believe me when I said I wasn't. FML

#14627865
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28788) - you deserved it (3064)

On 01/18/2011 at 4:23pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my extremely lazy roommate is in bed with the flu. Instead of getting up to get water, he's run the garden hose through his window, and instead of going to the bathroom, he's connected a siphon to his penis and run it to a 5-gallon bucket. I have to live with this idiot. FML

#14626510
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32159) - you deserved it (4701)

On 01/18/2011 at 1:35pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had an asthma attack because I was masturbating too vigorously. FML

#14614726
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17969) - you deserved it (43765) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, in high school, we had a presentation about sex, condoms, etc. After a while, the lady explained that we should get to know our sexual organs better. "For example, my daughter looks at her vagina in front of a mirror to check it out." I’m her daughter. FML

#14614725
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59550) - you deserved it (6146) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - Belgium - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I broke my nose by sneezing too close to a table. FML

#14614721
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27807) - you deserved it (7246) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - health - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, in dance class, the instructor asked me to demonstrate the splits to the group. I slid down, my legs opening wider as I descended. I then loudly farted for the full 5 seconds it took to reach the ground. FML

#14613104
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36152) - you deserved it (6028) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 11:44am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - Switzerland - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my dad’s best friend, who has been his business associate for the past 28 years, took me to a Star Wars store for my 18th birthday. He put on a Darth Vader helmet, and imitating his voice, said: "I am your father." I laughed. It wasn’t a joke. FML

#14610612
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44324) - you deserved it (3012) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML

#14610613
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43356) - you deserved it (27897) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins



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