About GoodLookingGeese : I'm too old 4 this s^it..
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Today, I sold my Xbox 360 on Craigslist. I met the dude at the mall. I gave him my Xbox and a handshake for buying. I left without the money. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14003) - you deserved it (48364)
On 05/22/2011 at 9:53am - money - by Derek Lee - United States (California)
Today, my Dad married his fiancée, who insists I call her "mom". I'm three years older than her, and went to the same high school. She's taking me shopping next week to buy me something "nice". FML
I agree, your life sucks (63466) - you deserved it (2811)
On 05/22/2011 at 5:31am - misc - by quickfingers100 - United Kingdom
Today, I woke up face-down in my grandfather's driveway, soaking wet with no pants, glitter in my hair, and holding an empty Skippy peanut butter jar. No one will tell me what happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27716) - you deserved it (15522)
On 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm - misc - by Devon (man) - United States (Vermont)
Today, I got pulled over for going about 88mph. When the cop asked why I was speeding, I replied, "I was trying to go back in time". He didn't like that answer and gave me a ticket. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9037) - you deserved it (47662)
On 05/19/2011 at 1:30am - work - by 613tanner -
Today, my girlfriend of 1 month came over and told me she wanted to talk to me. We sat down on the couch and she told me she was pregnant and that it was mine. I reminded her that we've never slept together. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56322) - you deserved it (3356)
On 05/18/2011 at 3:57am - intimacy - by Jackedup (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my mother said she called our internet provider, and told them to cancel it. In rage, I left for a friends house for a couple of hours. When I got home, she told me she was joking, and wanted me out of the house so she could eat all the ice-cream. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12191) - you deserved it (25174)
On 05/04/2011 at 5:11am - misc - by Derps (man) - Denmark (Midtjyllen)
Today, I saw a car swerving in front of me on the freeway, so I whipped out my cell to report the DUI. As soon as it started ringing, I see police lights in my rear view and got slapped with a ticket for using a cell phone while driving. After explaining why, the officer said, "Nice try." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20080) - you deserved it (19126)
On 05/03/2011 at 1:22am - misc - by AE86Turbo (man) - United States (California)
Today, after teaching my 4 year old son about the concept of "Stranger Danger," we had gone to a park full of people. When I walked up to him to tell him we had to leave, he ran, screaming "Stranger! Don't touch me!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (29106) - you deserved it (5748)
On 05/03/2011 at 1:01am - kids - by armywife980 -
Today, my drunk dad started yelling at my dog for not having a job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39210) - you deserved it (4361)
On 04/28/2011 at 11:53am - animals - by Cecilly2010 -
Today, my football coach thought it would be a good idea to get drunk, run to the other sideline, and scream, "WELCOME TO SPARTA, BITCH!" This would've been funny if he weren't also my dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29075) - you deserved it (2841)
On 04/28/2011 at 6:28am - misc - by spartanson -
Today, while buying groceries, I noticed that the lady in front of me had left a box behind. I grabbed the box and ran out the door after her. After turning around to find three employees chasing me, I noticed I had just stolen the donation box. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24795) - you deserved it (13568)
On 04/26/2011 at 12:45am - misc - by magicman - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I got a letter back from the family I will be staying with as a part of an exchange program. Apparently they own a slaughterhouse type farm, and I'm expected to kill one of their animals and eat it as a gift from the family. I'm a vegan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31533) - you deserved it (15682)
On 04/25/2011 at 10:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom
Today, I came home to find that all my porn magazines have been "censored" with a black sharpie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19673) - you deserved it (39434)
On 04/21/2011 at 2:30pm - intimacy - by Username - United States
Today, we had a tornado warning and I told my parents I loved them, just in case. My dad just said "see you in Kansas". FML
I agree, your life sucks (20014) - you deserved it (894)
On 04/10/2011 at 11:26pm - misc - by anonymous -
Today, my cab driver told me about the time he tried to commit suicide by driving off a bridge... while we were crossing a river. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33225) - you deserved it (2453)
On 03/24/2011 at 6:51pm - misc - by phantomdriver - Canada (Alberta)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
